SheSings Posted February 23, 2010 Posted February 23, 2010 Are some people really meant to be single? At 25 now (and still a virgin), I've had very little experience dating men. I'm even self-conscious of the fact that I've had so little history with relationships, as all my girl-friends will get into discussing their husbands/boyfriends and I'm left to sit there feeling awkward and left-out. I've had one relationship that lasted about four months, but never got too serious. I've had a few first dates. I don't have much chances to meet new guys, as besides work, I rarely leave the comfort of my circle of good friends, and I wouldn't be interested in meeting someone in a club or bar, since I'm horribly uncomfortable with places like that. (I really, really hate crowds.) I've been shy since I was a kid, and tend to be quiet and reserved with people I don't know yet, though I open up to people after a little bit. I really don't think I'm such a hard person to get to know or to get along with. I'm interested in trying to get into dating again, but I feel so very clueless on what I should do. Where do I begin? I think if I don't break out of this rut now, then I may just have to resign myself to life as the crazy cat lady. Help, please?
Soul Bear Posted February 23, 2010 Posted February 23, 2010 My da always warned me to stay away from women who loves cats!!! Hey you should try online. The idea to you probably seems crazy crazy crazy. I though so too before i met someone amazing You never know, you have a very high chance of meeting someone great. Or just some crazy cat guy. Either way, it's a winner both ways!! Do you feel sassy and sexy? Do you go out and drink ith friends? Do you get approached I think still being a virgin is also another part of your clulessness. Not that its a bad thing good luck!
boogieboy Posted February 23, 2010 Posted February 23, 2010 You have to get out of your comfort zone to meet guys. You will not get any progress otherwise. And your friends arent very good friends, if they arent helping you get dates.
terra Posted February 23, 2010 Posted February 23, 2010 WE have lots in common, I'm older than you now, but you sound like me at 25. I just joined lots of clubs and groups and forced myself to get out there and meet lots of new people. It was good for me because the skills that you get with meeting new people help you to be less shy with members of the opposite sex. After reading posts on LS it made me realize that there are plenty of people in our situation and there are actually a number of people without a ton of experience with relationships. Also sometimes those that have a lot of experience doesn't necessarily make them wiser. Just be yourself and have fun - leave those cats at home alone once and a while.
SincereOnlineGuy Posted February 23, 2010 Posted February 23, 2010 That last person is right. It really is a numbers game, relating to you meeting more eligible people than you tend to do now. Your being a virgin at 25 doesn't matter one bit. People forget that while math tests have "averages" and to be below them is a downer... being far to one side in terms of the 'average' age at which someone loses her virginity, is JUST statistics. You're going to do much better for yourself losing your virginity at age 28 than you would had you lost it at age 11 or so. At some point, when you do meet the right guy, you need to just be direct and clear about never having done it before... and if you let that SEEM ok in your mind, it is highly probable that he will let it BE ok in his mind. Identify the things you like to do away from work, and then make greater efforts to do them. Put yourself in the path of people who are likely to have the most in common with you. Take a class... and even if the class is all female, there are sure to be eligible males on the campus.
jhonrider19 Posted February 23, 2010 Posted February 23, 2010 I think you are just being insecure sweetie. I do it all the time, you have to trust, because if you don't the relationship wont work. It's hard, especially when we women have these little hunches about things, but the bottom line is- Who is he with?, Who does he tell he loves? Your man does things I wish my man would do and you're complaining, darn lol. I wish I had it like you sweetie. Make him only ever want to love you. and all this in love, life long talk is cute, but really, enjoy the moment. Live for right now ok. Don't think of the what ifs and may be in this situation. Let all of that go ok Good Luck.
blind_otter Posted February 23, 2010 Posted February 23, 2010 Get good with yourself before you start dating. Be happy with yourself first. If you don't, you will get into bad relationships and end up even worse off than you feel now. I know this from experience.
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