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Posted

Hey,

 

I recently started a relationship with a girl I had met online and known for years. We live about 4-5 hours apart, so just far enough to make it difficult to meet.

 

We've only been on a couple of dates but we got along great and we talk online most of the time. In that respect things are going amazing, but we are finding it hard to find time for each other because our schedules clash so much. Weekdays aren't possible because of work commitments, and our weekends are booked up for months (either me or her). The time we spend together in person is amazing. Our relationship online is good too though.

 

But basically put, she's joining the army soon, and will become even more unavailable. I'm finding it really difficult to cope with this, I haven't said anything to her about it because I don't want to affect her decisions. She had wanted to do this before I met her. She's expressed that she'd like to be posted abroad too.

 

I feel a bit threatened by how little we'll be able to see each other. Our relationship is still quite young but I really feel a connection with her and I hope she feels the same way. We haven't really talked about how we'll cope, we've just been looking for days when we can still meet.

 

Does anyone have any ideas that could help me feel better about it? I don't want to lose her and it feels like she's slipping away with all this time we won't be able to see each other. :(

 

Thanks

Posted
Hey,

 

I recently started a relationship with a girl I had met online and known for years. We live about 4-5 hours apart, so just far enough to make it difficult to meet.

 

We've only been on a couple of dates but we got along great and we talk online most of the time. In that respect things are going amazing, but we are finding it hard to find time for each other because our schedules clash so much. Weekdays aren't possible because of work commitments, and our weekends are booked up for months (either me or her). The time we spend together in person is amazing. Our relationship online is good too though.

 

But basically put, she's joining the army soon, and will become even more unavailable. I'm finding it really difficult to cope with this, I haven't said anything to her about it because I don't want to affect her decisions. She had wanted to do this before I met her. She's expressed that she'd like to be posted abroad too.

 

I feel a bit threatened by how little we'll be able to see each other. Our relationship is still quite young but I really feel a connection with her and I hope she feels the same way. We haven't really talked about how we'll cope, we've just been looking for days when we can still meet.

 

Does anyone have any ideas that could help me feel better about it? I don't want to lose her and it feels like she's slipping away with all this time we won't be able to see each other. :(

 

Thanks

 

I am sorry nobody has responded to your question. I think the only way you are going to feel better about it is to talk it over with her and see what she has to say about it. Tell her your concerns, she might be feeling the same way you do. Also, tell her how you want to help support her and ask how you can make this easier for her as well. Together you can find ways to brainstorm about what you both want or expect and what you might do to help make this easier for both of you. Good luck!

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Posted

Well, turned out she doesn't actually want to join the army. It was just a way for her to try and get away from her situation where she lived.

 

Now she's all depressed and a little scary so going to go see her ASAP. Will let you know how it goes. Thanks for the reply though, was less worried after I'd just given it some time.

 

I guess you just have to live for the moments you get together, rather than living in anticipation of the next.

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