cdt76 Posted February 22, 2010 Posted February 22, 2010 "You don't get it....I've waited my whole life to feel this miserable and if that's what it takes to stay connected to her, then that's who I have to be." Truer words I've never felt.
GrayClouds Posted February 22, 2010 Posted February 22, 2010 cdt76,that sounds good in a movie but not in real life. Staying miserable does not keep you connection to her, it just keeps you connected to your pain.
Author cdt76 Posted February 22, 2010 Author Posted February 22, 2010 But if there is nothing left inside but pain and anger, it is what I am. I don't produce it. I don't sit here wanting to feel like crap. I just am. Nothing I do can pull me out of it long enough to FORGET! I want to FORGET EVERYTHING and I can't. Even when I sleep! So I am connected to her in the most negative of ways possible and I don't see a way of turning it off. And I do want to turn it off. I sincerely do.
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