Limbo21 Posted February 20, 2010 Posted February 20, 2010 Why? What's her game? It's been 30 days nc, I was having a night out with some good friends when I noticed the email on my phone. It even contains an attachment? I won't read it though, what's the point of taking myself back to day 1? So far I've changed my mobile no, deactivated my facebook account, blocked all her email acounts (she kept settin new email addresses up to get around the block) & set up a new email addy to avoid her. She must have gone through all her old emails cos she has sent this latest one to an old old account. I dare not even go into my original email address as there will be many emails from her also I'm quite determined not to read, speak or respond to her, I just don't understand why she is still contacting me? Anyway - cracking night out & spent a small fortune, same she put a dampner on it
coltsfan1 Posted February 20, 2010 Posted February 20, 2010 if your determine to not read it, then has no ill effect on your evening. I also wanted to say good for you!
Odyssey Posted February 20, 2010 Posted February 20, 2010 why? most likely...validation in times of vulnerability... Does it really matter?
Meaplus3 Posted February 20, 2010 Posted February 20, 2010 It sounds like you are making every effort to have this person leave you alone.. and that's a good thing. By the sounds of things, I'd gather she must be a very needy and a lonely person.. So, continue to block as much contact as possible and ignore her. She will get the hint at some point in time. Good luck. Mea:)
GrayClouds Posted February 20, 2010 Posted February 20, 2010 Why? What's her game? It's been 30 days nc, I was having a night out with some good friends when I noticed the email on my phone. It even contains an attachment? I won't read it though, what's the point of taking myself back to day 1? So far I've changed my mobile no, deactivated my facebook account, blocked all her email acounts (she kept settin new email addresses up to get around the block) & set up a new email addy to avoid her. She must have gone through all her old emails cos she has sent this latest one to an old old account. I dare not even go into my original email address as there will be many emails from her also I'm quite determined not to read, speak or respond to her, I just don't understand why she is still contacting me? Anyway - cracking night out & spent a small fortune, same she put a dampner on it Limbo see this as her giving you a refection of your strength. Did you ever think 8 weeks ago you would be having a good night out with friends. You work vey hard to get to this point of healing so congratulate yourself. And even with her wacky loony tunes behavior at her best can on put a damper on the night. Keep on keeping on.
Author Limbo21 Posted February 21, 2010 Author Posted February 21, 2010 Coltsfan .... What it has done though is make me wonder what the hell is she asking to be so determined to get back in contact after all of my attempts in avoiding her? - thanks for the goodluck btw Odyssey ..... Guess not, suprised how much power the old relationship still holds over me. I'm now thinking about her non-stop but I do feel more focussed Mea ...... You say 'needy & lonely'. You should work on police profiling! You have hit the bullseye. Yes I am doing all I can thanks, it's been tough .... Just found myself now wondering what I would say if she asked for me back? Grayclouds ..... Damn your right, I would never have dreamed I would be feeling as bright as this 8 weeks ago! I'm even toyomg with coming of the meds? I'm starting to find the odd moment of excitement & enjoying but the real change I've noticed is acceptance that I'll never see or speak to her again & that is when the real healing takes place
Author Limbo21 Posted February 23, 2010 Author Posted February 23, 2010 Oh, Guys, guys, guys.... The email she has sent me has really shook me up. My love for this girl has just washed over me. I feel totally submerged at this time. All I want to do is reach out & tell her I love her but it's pointless. I've not even read the bloody thing! I thought I was really moving on, turning the corner ... I've got a friend who's going to read it so I can delete it & if necessary, ask him what it read in a few months. Our memories, the times we had - I was/am so passionately in love with this girl, she was MY soulmate. Everything reminds me of her- still - so many months has gone by, and I still feel the same. Just takes an email to bring it all back I can't believe how bad I've been feeling since Saturday after recieving this. Just wish I could hide away until the summer. Sorry for the post, you've all been so supportive. I just want to get over her. The best thing that's ever happened to me
Ilovecake Posted February 23, 2010 Posted February 23, 2010 the bad news is that little things like simply seeing their name pop up can take us right back to the original pain but the good news is as you keep NC and time goes by that upset feeling last just a little shorter every time. I don't know about you but at first the simple mention of my ex would send me in to a depression that lasted for days or weeks, now I get pissed, maybe a little sad but a few hours later I have forgotten all about it. That’s how I know I’m slowly getting over it.
GrayClouds Posted February 23, 2010 Posted February 23, 2010 Oh, Guys, guys, guys.... The email she has sent me has really shook me up. My love for this girl has just washed over me. I feel totally submerged at this time. All I want to do is reach out & tell her I love her but it's pointless. I've not even read the bloody thing! I thought I was really moving on, turning the corner ... I've got a friend who's going to read it so I can delete it & if necessary, ask him what it read in a few months. Our memories, the times we had - I was/am so passionately in love with this girl, she was MY soulmate. Everything reminds me of her- still - so many months has gone by, and I still feel the same. Just takes an email to bring it all back I can't believe how bad I've been feeling since Saturday after recieving this. Just wish I could hide away until the summer. Sorry for the post, you've all been so supportive. I just want to get over her. The best thing that's ever happened to me The fact is anything in that email, after all she has done, is just her trying to make herself look better and build her ego. She does not deserve that from you. She can neot even give you enough respect to let you go NC. Those feelings? All they are is just you letting go a little bit more. Yes is comes in wave, and they feel like love but what they are is letting go. This is good. Your doing great and keep it up.
Author Limbo21 Posted February 24, 2010 Author Posted February 24, 2010 This is why I've changed my mobile, deactivated my fb a/c and don't go into my main email address. Cos I know I'm not strong enough to be absorbing any info from her. She could even be asking for me back .... Which she's done 3 times before, then pull away when she can She's never afforded me nc. It's all about her, her needs & her desires. I really don't think she realises how much I love her & how much she has hurt me. A friend I've met through work has just split from his mrs after 5 years so we seem to bounce of each other with advice and support, but I'm shocked how 1 email (that was sent in errror I think - like one of those automated links when you join fb, sending out messages to all her contacts) can make me feel ill again. And of course, still majorly pissed off over how well off she is since we split where as I can't even afford to heat my house & pay for my 4 hour commute to work & back daily oh ****!! This is not getting any easier
GrayClouds Posted February 24, 2010 Posted February 24, 2010 Yes when the wave a pain hit it still hits hard, but remember just the other day you were say how well you were doing. The difference between the began of this whole hell and now is you have insight that it does get better. YOu have seen there is the other side to the pain. While you may not be there right, and it may be some tiem before you make perminate residents in "Painfree Land", now you know that it exist, and for you have seen it, visited it, actually had some fun there. It is there waiting and in time and some effort you will get there again. Know that give us strenght and understand to say; "wow this is sucking again but it is not forever" with that knowledge we have power and the streth to keep pushing on. You are doing great Limbo, so much better then you were, use that support of your mate, and be kind to yourself.
Author Limbo21 Posted February 26, 2010 Author Posted February 26, 2010 That helps GC, I've been focusing on times where I've not felt so bad and gues what, I think the worst has passed (for now). The email shock me up, not even read it lol it's madness, I've always had 2 emails addys (rbown48@googlemail - rbown48@yahoo) so when split up first time around I created another (rpbown48@yahoo). We got back together, split again & created a forth (rpbown48@googlemail). She knows all of them bar the last one and that's the one that got the email (she's blocked on all the others) it seems she's sent emails to all the a/c's including the last email which she doesn't know exists?!! The odds of her sending me an email to an a/c that she doesn't know I have is crazy, she will have sent emails to every r(p) bown in the whole of cyberspace. She obviously wants to contact me but it'll just be breadcrumbs She's technically insane BUT I fancy the pants of her ... It's amazing what you'll overlook when your in love. Thanks again brother, feeling much better & still haven't read any emails
Recommended Posts