Should I get my ex back?

[Pinot Noir]

Ok.This is going to be kind of long but here it goes.I broke up with my ex about a month ago.We dated for about 5 months and for the first 4 months everything as perfect (well almost).It took her 3 months to recognize our relationship because she is not used to relationships but she got into a relationship with me anyway.Everything was so good,she almost worshipped the ground I walked on and I looked forward to seeing her.She was always really eager to see me and sacrificed other things to be with me.

 

Basically the problems started when some girls from her past started messaging her on Facebook. First I didn't say anything but they insisted on meeting her although it was clear it said "in a relationship" on her page and she told them she was seeing somebody.They just didn't listen.One girl I had an argument with because she didn't back off and my ex didn't tell her off.

Then her ex gf came into the picture.I saw her leaving really sexual messages on her page but my ex just ignored them but kept talking to her.I told her not to talk to her ex but when I said that she got pissed at me,told me they were only friends and that she wouldn't excommunicate a friend but her ex clearly wanted to be with her and I got into an argument with her also.I asked her if she wanted to get back with my gf(ex now) and she said "yeah kind of so if anything happens between us it is not my problem" then I told her we were in a relationship and that she should back off.I forwarded all the messages to my ex but she didn't listen to me.Fast forward to 2 weeks later the day we broke up she met her ex and her ex gave her heroine and tried to take advantage of her sexually and the same day my ex sent me a message saying she wanted to hang out(5 hours after we broke up).After that incident my ex stopped talking to her but a week after she added her on Facebook again because her ex overdosed at a party and she needed help so my ex took her to her apartment and helped her,cleaned her apartment etc. She told me that and then I got pissed and stopped talking to her.I sent her a last message saying I still cared about her but it wasn't possible to keep being friends when her ex was in the picture.I told her I needed to clear my head and spend some time alone because the break up really hurt me and I couldn't just stay friends with her but I told her I was always going to be there for her if she needed anything.

 

Now this ex problem and some things she did made me question if I really wanted to be with her because she also has a little drinking problem(she drunk texted me a couple of times) and she did cocaine once and smoked pot.The only thing that kept me by her side was her sweet personality and she really cared about me and liked me but her life is kind of effed up..She is a party person and the parties she goes are always wild.I never went to a party with her because those places are not my thing.

 

The other thing is she told me she broke up with me because she thought I didn't like her anymore.It is true I was kind of distant lately in our relationship but I was really upset she did the things I mentioned above.She said I didn't comfort her when she used some drugs mixed with alcohol and had a bad time after that but I had no idea how to respond to that.

I also had serious trust issues because she lied to me about some things and more importantly she flirts with every female on her Facebook page..I'm sure she has never cheated on me but the fact that she is very flirty with everyone angered me because other females didn't leave her alone since she flirted with them.She said she had a hard time ignoring people and "breaking their heart" by telling them off but only a few of her friends knew about her relationship and lots of her friends are the people she dated in the past or just slept with and right after we broke up lots of them were so happy and she told me she received dozens of messages from girls wanting to hook up with her.

 

She says she in not comfortable being close to people and she broke up not only because she thought I didn't like her anymore but she is not comfortable being in a relationship.She said she is not ready for anything serious right now but I don't understand why she got into a relationship with me in the first place..

 

Anyway..now she is angry at me because I stopped talking to her completely but I really need to heal myself and I told her that.She is really pissed and heartbroken,she says I don't care about her anymore and that I NEVER cared for her but that's not true.I do care for her I'm just too depressed because she doesn't want a relationship and all the things I went through..

 

Now she says she likes somebody but I don't know who..(we have mutual friends that's how I learned).She sent me a message telling me she missed me and she wanted to talk to me.She sent me lots of messages and called but I never answered any of them and now I feel kind of guilty.

 

Please can you help me out? Any advices appreciated.

Thanks for reading.

[threebyfate]

she is not comfortable being in a relationship

This is about the only truth she's told you, in all you've written. It's also the only thing that should matter to you. Everything else is just static.

 

Do yourself a serious favour and run away as far and fast as you can from this drama queen. If you think you're in pain now, wait until you've had another year of her eternal nonsense and lies.