lovesienna Posted February 17, 2010 Posted February 17, 2010 i dont even know where to begin. i met him in my first year of university in america. he was quite a catch. he had a reputation of being a player. women adored him regardless because of his irresistible charm. i wasnt one of them. i didnt bother chasing him. we talked from time to time throughout the university years. he dated around. i was with my ex of 4 years. then when i was no longer with my ex of 4 years, i was able to move on quickly than expected. i dated around, but nothing serious. then i graduated and moved back to canada. i made frequent visits to america because of my best friend and other few close friends. i often saw him at parties, often hung out with my crowd. every time i visited, he always talked to me every single day and night. few times he asked me to go to museums and few other attractions just to keep him company. then last summer, my best friend organized the road trip to florida. he came on the trip with us for the full 3 weeks. he and i talked so much that our friends got mad at us for making them wait. when my best friend asked me if i liked him more than a friend, i remember telling her with such distaste 'no way in hell'. but as 3 weeks rolled by, i found myself liking him more and more. then eventually he confessed how much he liked me and how much he truly enjoyed my company. he took me out to lunch/dinners. he even made delicious meals just for me. then on my birthday, he asked me to be his girlfriend. i was truly happy. keep in mind, i hadnt hit home run with him. so that was why i knew he wasnt playing me. he wanted me to meet his parents and his family so he paid for my flight. and then he flew to my hometown to meet my family. long distance wasnt easy. we texted each other every single day and video-phoned each other most of the nights. then somehow we talked about 'us' and i told him that i didnt want to keep up with this visiting each other for the next year or two. he agreed. so we looked for solutions. he couldnt move up here. i couldnt move down there. then without warning, he called it off. i was completely crushed. he texted me saying he hated doing this but he had to and that he hoped id see the bigger picture. i told him i had nothing to say to him but then a week later i texted him saying i couldnt even agree more and that id like us to be friends. so we remained friends. it's been 4 months now since we broke up and ive tried everything by not contacting him first, dating other guys, going out with friends, keeping myself busy but nothing worked. he kept contacting me, and he still does. two weeks ago he wanted to video phone me, so we did and it was really good to see him after so long. then right after video phone, he texted me saying that it was great seeing me again and that he wanted to do it again soon and that seeing me made him skip a beat. that threw me off and i wasnt sure how to interpret it.all i said was, 'thats good, i think.' last week on that superbowl day, he texted me throughout the game. i was surprised because he loves football and i thought he'd be too busy watching the game. and few days ago, he texted me saying his childhood dog just passed away. even though i wasnt able to be there for him physically, i was able to be there for him via texting. he texted me saying thank you for being there for him and that hes really glad im still around......
MizzBella Posted February 17, 2010 Posted February 17, 2010 The "big picture" makes sense if relocation were impossible, but is it impossible? Why can't one of you relocate?
Author lovesienna Posted February 17, 2010 Author Posted February 17, 2010 because of my non-american citizenship, i couldnt get a job there in america. economy is bad now that america's focusing on their citizens first. he couldnt move up here because he has commitments with his job and he made a promise to his parents that he'd assist them with their business. a promise that he refuses to break--which i truly understand. that left us no option but to break up.
Author lovesienna Posted February 17, 2010 Author Posted February 17, 2010 id like to add something...sorry if im not being clear earlier. i have so many things on my mind, even with my emotions all tangled up when i write about him. the thing is really...... i am confused. truly confused. this guy is not telling me how he is feeling. i mean, if a man really wants a woman to know how he feels, he would tell her straight up, not being so vague. right? i mean, the other day he shoot a text saying he just opened some fortune cookie related to being happy and that people would be content at one point or another and for us, hes happy but he expects something more. he wants to rediscover what was lost from him. then he didnt want to get into details. since then we never went back to that topic. should i tell him how i feel? will that backfire? im afraid, so afraid to get hurt again.
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