Sad Valentines Day

[confused_pjl]

I had originally added this to my original post a couple of days ago and didn't get many replies. Any feedback, opinions and/or suggestions you may have will be helpful.

 

So Valentines day was very TOUGH for me. I couldn't avoid it if I tried. All my friends and family talking about celebrating with their SO and every TV show talking about VDay. I was super depressed during the day.

 

In my earlier post I thought my EX was already on her business trip to Decatur. I found out that she actually only left yesterday. I've had NC for not even a week yet and this is killing me. I'm trying to be strong. Reading the posts on here and the replies to my entries are really helpful, thank you to all of you who have given me advice and are helping me cope and move forward.

 

I had to tell my mother to support my NC as well. She is constantly checking my EX's FB to see what's she been up to, what her status is and what photo's (if any) have been posted. This sets me back just as much as if I looked at it myself. My EX still has photos of me on her FB profile, is this normal? Is she keeping them on because my friends and family are still FB friends with her or is it because she wants them there? Should I ask all my friends and family to remove her from FB or just tell them to keep what ever they see to themselves?

 

On another note, I had a date last night. This girl added me to FB 3 weeks ago and started talking to me on MSN and TXT'ing me shortly after my EX left me. I'm obviously still hurting from what my EX did. I thought having the attention and comfort of another woman would help me move on. Well, it did temporarily. I enjoyed her company, we even fooled around a bit. As soon as she left I started thinking about my EX again. Is it a good thing for me to start seeing other women so quickly or is it going to make me feel worse in the long run?

 

I also can't help still thinking that there is hope. I know I shouldn't and I need to move on. I'm trying, but its hard. I keep thinking that the 2 weeks she will be away will make her realize what she gave up. I've been going to the gym, hanging out with friends/ family and trying to keep myself busy. I'm starting to realize that I will never understand why she did this and how she could leave me for such a different person, polar opposites to be exact.

[akeachi]

Sorry to hear about your breakup.

 

Its better to be on your own on valentines than be with your ex like i was!! To finally ask whats going on after a holiday and a week with one anouther to be told - he cant commit to a relationship right now.

 

Go NC - seriously. i came on here people told me to steer clear- i didnt. I'm back to square one!! On the plus side i now know it will never work.

 

He STILL has photos on FB of us i dont know why! i just de tagged myself. Im not friends with him anymore on F.book i was for a while but i dont see the point, i only saw stuff that would get me upset - if i hadnt of seen it i wouldnt have known.

 

When my EX before the recent one dumped me i started dating three months after, i had one date with a really nice guy we txtd a lot but i still compared him to my ex then i found my now ex nick he just blew me away with his looks and his desire to commit to someone. Literally after that date i never thought about my ex in the same way. I was over him. BUT i never got over the fact that we ended, so when the red flags flew on the new r.ship i ignored them because i didnt want to b single again or admit defeat.

 

So what i now plan to do is just try and let go of BOTH failed r.ships and not look for a replacement. Im going to sweep myself off of my own feet so that im ready for the next guy and if the next guy doesnt work out- cya later cuz im fine on my own and wont settle for second best!! I think its important to be happy with yourself. Right now the only thing that makes me happy is the thought of being back with my Ex and having those first dates etc - which i need to change.

 

Im on my second day of NC which is hard because he is willing to come and spend time with me etc and refuses to put closure on it himself. But its better this way its awful and its lonely but its better.

 

She may miss you she may not. Ultimately though she took a long look at you ad all your qualities and decided she doesnt want it. So chances are she may be feeling lonely or whatever. but i would put £20 on it saying it wont be what you want even if she does and it probably wouldnt last

 

Your mum needs to remove her as a friend - they have nothing in common anymore her business is her business. Its not for you to know. Some exs like to stay friends - personally i think its weird and never works, even when ive been the dumper i refused to stay friends becasue i knew he wanted something more and i didnt want that.

 

Just be you!! go to the gym go for runs remove EVERYTHING that reminds you of her if you cant bin it (i cant!) then put it away somewhere. What you dont want are new memories. just put a full stop on the end of it - eventually you'll get bored of thinking of something that happened months ago.

 

You'll get there