Perhaps Posted February 16, 2010 Posted February 16, 2010 So, my ex decides to call - I ignore it. Then, my friend tells me she's asking him how I am. When he goes ahead and lets her know that Perhaps is doing exactly as you told him - he's leaving you alone. All of a sudden, she gets all defensive - "why do you give me attitude.. i just wanna know how he's doing" and leaves.The nerve of this chick... Seriously? After spending a year, begging her to give up alcohol and weed and smoking and being her little doormat, I found LS and took your advice and went NC. Well, another thing that helped was that she found me annoying, stopping her from having fun. So I left. Now, she wants to know how I'm doing, hoping I'm okay. She didn't give a rat's backside when I sat on the phone, crying when she was high. So, I get a call from a blocked number two minutes after my friend told me what had happened. I couldn't resist. Her: Hi... *pause* Me: Hi. *long pause* Her: busy? Me: Yes. and I hung up. I know some might say that was a bit rude of me but trust me, most of you would agree with me when I say that every single moment I've spent alone in the past 2 months, every time I'm in the shower, I've caught myself thinking up a scenario where she comes back, crying, apologizing, and I spit a smarta** one-liner, leaving her shocked. Well, after I hung up, I felt bad and I texted back saying 'Sorry about that.. phone died. Hope all's well.' She texted back saying everything's fine. But ugh, how can she knowingly use me, and call back like nothing ever happened. And when she gets told that it I'm doing what she wanted, she has the NERVE to get angry? She won't say sorry - she knows she's hurt me and I've told her so before. Why can't some people just realize, be mature and admit to their wrongs?
bananaboat11 Posted February 16, 2010 Posted February 16, 2010 I commend you, sir. Well done on being strong. I hate my ex (at the moment)... but I probably would've given in. Thank you for doing something I wouldn't have the heart to do.
DustySaltus Posted February 16, 2010 Posted February 16, 2010 It's all about the craving to have power over you. Some people may interpret this as an opportunity for a second chance but I have a feeling you are a lot smarter than that. Maybe she realized she made a mistake but her pride won't ever allow her to apologize. And you know what, who cares? Because that's who she is and she's not going to change. You've changed though, I can tell from your words and that's a great thing. I do believe in Karma and the fact is you needed to go through something like this in order to know what you really want. We all need to stop the cycle at some point and you did a good job of that. Continue moving forward and good things are in store for you. DS
jlr Posted February 16, 2010 Posted February 16, 2010 Oh man, been there, done that. Our exes sound quite similar. My ex went through the "high all the time" phase after we broke up, and wasn't there for me. But I was always her doormat and there for her. I feel you. And I had the same situation with a mutual friend, her asking how I was. I know how frustrating it is. You made the right choice. I wish I would've made the choice you did, because the way I handled it (like a wimp), it ended up bringing nothing but Stay strong.
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