Vegas Baby Posted February 16, 2010 Posted February 16, 2010 My bf & I have been together for more than 9 months now. We've talked about being together forever, getting married, having kids, of course a lil down the road. Well that all blew up in my face tonight & I don't think it was fair to me. I told him that I want more intimacy in the relationship & then he instantly thinks that I'm trying to "make a baby" every chance I get since, yes I admit I've mentioned it a few months back, BUT he mentioned it in the same context as me, so for him to deny me or refuse to be intimate just because he thinks that is ridiculous. I told him he's a hypocrite & then he started mentioning (since we live together) that apparently it bothers him that we talk about marriage or whatever & he thinks it's too fast? Then WHY mention it now, why say things you don't mean from before??? I told him he's going to regret saying those things tonight because it literally upset me & its unfair to put the blame on me. I don't get it. Can anyone shed some light on this??? Why does he say or do something and then later take it back? Great now he just texted me saying he doesn't think he's good enough for me and that he's sorry. See what this is doing to me? It's confusing the hell out of me and I seriously can't take this mental abuse. What's going on?
counterman Posted February 16, 2010 Posted February 16, 2010 I think that if you want to talk about something, you should be able to because if you aren't comfortable with talking about it now, then it becomes an issue later on. You want someone who you know you can have a future with and talking about marriage and having children doesn't mean it's happening right now. I think that has to be made clear. Maybe he did jump to conclusions and that's why he thought it was "too fast". Sometimes, from my experience, guys say things they don't mean to get something out of a girl. If he was dead set serious about marriage and the talk of kids, then he would be able to talk to you about it. I mean, as long as it isn't all the time and, clearly, it isn't. So, I'm guessing he didn't really mean what he said and he just said it to get something out of you. As for his text, it's a very cowardly way to suggest a break up. He doesn't have the heart to break up with you so he says that he's "not good enough"; he wants you to break up with him. He's trying to get out of this as cleanly as possible., without discussing anything, in my opinion. What are you going to do now?
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