littlewhiterose Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 Have you ever had someone blow so hot that they blow themselves out of the water? I met someone the other night and i'm just trying to understand WTH happened. The introduction was more of a networking thing. The idea of anything else had not crossed my mind yet but I kept an open mind. The more we chatted about the industry & stuff, the more we found we found we had in common. Because I was still in network mode, I kept it professional and friendly. And so was he, or so I thought. Although he told me he was currently in the industry, when he introduced me to one of his friends, his friend let it slip that he was actually "retired" (Red flag#1). That's when he went full speed with the come-ons (Red flag#2). We had exchanged numbers earlier but when it came time to leave, he kept asking me to call him the next day- several times, in regards to some business things we had talked about. And just as I was leaving, he says "you know, i can go as fast as you want, or as slow as you need to go" and threw just a lot of complements- to the point where I was wondering if he was even being sincere at all. I found it a bit overwhelming and a little confusing but driving home I thought maybe I was just being overly protective of myself. Maybe I was just blowing the whole thing out of proportion. Maybe I could loosen up a bit??? I just had reservations because of our first meeting and the speed of everything. So I called him, and again it was the same thing, him throwing brash come-ons -all over again (red flag #3). I had mentioned an industry event I was going to today and he asked me to call him if I was going, he was free all day, he would drive down from two cities away (50 miles) to meet up. I was hoping to surprise him with maybe grabbing a drink or dinner afterwards, as part of me loosening up and getting to know him better. I called him today and it went straight to VM. And I haven't heard back since and the event's over now. I was willing to get to know the guy a little bit better despite the weird/awkward beginning... but slowly. In time. So WTH? I guess my question is, can someone blow way too hot that they blow themselves out of the water? Like, when it doesn't go their way? or in their time?
Hot Carl Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 He'll call you back when he recovers from his 7 day drinking binge and figures out how to get home.
D-Lish Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 I think when you sense someone is a little "off" that you should trust your instincts. You over reasoned and second guessed yourself despite your internal warnings he was bad news. Whenever I have done the same thing, I've only re-affirmed my initial reaction. My advice would be to ignore him if he tries to return your call- which he most likely will at some point, on his own terms.
skydiveaddict Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 He'll call you back when he recovers from his 7 day drinking binge and figures out how to get home. LOL Yea if he remembers her. Stay away from this guy. You can do alot better than him.
Author littlewhiterose Posted February 15, 2010 Author Posted February 15, 2010 I think when you sense someone is a little "off" that you should trust your instincts. You over reasoned and second guessed yourself despite your internal warnings he was bad news. HA! You're right about that. That's exactly what I did, and I think I convinced myself that I was writing him off too quickly. I think he freaked out when he realized the event he tried to commit himself to fell on Valentine's day. I couldn't have cared less that it was but still...
D-Lish Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 HA! You're right about that. That's exactly what I did, and I think I convinced myself that I was writing him off too quickly. I think he freaked out when he realized the event he tried to commit himself to fell on Valentine's day. I couldn't have cared less that it was but still... As humans, we under-estimate our instincts. I've over-reasoned and rationalized things in the past, over-riding my instincts... I have to say it's resulted in bad choices or let-downs. I would just write him off- there is something "off" about someone that comes on too strong too quickly.
Author littlewhiterose Posted February 15, 2010 Author Posted February 15, 2010 He'll call you back when he recovers from his 7 day drinking binge and figures out how to get home. ... eww, PASS! I would just write him off- there is something "off" about someone that comes on too strong too quickly. and Oh yeah, written off! but Man! He had great connections! I met a couple that night...oh well.
D-Lish Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 and Oh yeah, written off! but Man! He had great connections! I met a couple that night...oh well. Who knows if he was just blowin smoke out his ass about that too- as you mentioned someone else said he was "retired" and your antenna went up regarding that.
Author littlewhiterose Posted February 15, 2010 Author Posted February 15, 2010 Yeah, true. That's entirely possible. I just don't think he was entirely "reading" me or the situation, otherwise he may adjusted his game plan. He kind of just went balls to the wall. His friends were much more laid back and cool. I guess I got the firecracker of the bunch.
D-Lish Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 Yeah, true. That's entirely possible. I just don't think he was entirely "reading" me or the situation, otherwise he may adjusted his game plan. He kind of just went balls to the wall. His friends were much more laid back and cool. I guess I got the firecracker of the bunch. You didn't "get him" you gravitated towards him. Why? And you read him right away by your own admittance my sweet little rose:) You just chose to ignore the red flags.
Author littlewhiterose Posted February 15, 2010 Author Posted February 15, 2010 You didn't "get him" you gravitated towards him. Why? And you read him right away by your own admittance my sweet little rose:) You just chose to ignore the red flags. Yup, initially from a networking standpoint. D-Lish, you're so right! Damn it! I'm BUSTED! I guess the bigger question is how/why I bypassed my intuition which I usually follow. I guess I put waaay more value on the networking part instead of seeing what was going on right in front of me. D-Lish, thanks for helping me see that.... you're awesome!
D-Lish Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 Yup, initially from a networking standpoint. D-Lish, you're so right! Damn it! I'm BUSTED! I guess the bigger question is how/why I bypassed my intuition which I usually follow. I guess I put waaay more value on the networking part instead of seeing what was going on right in front of me. D-Lish, thanks for helping me see that.... you're awesome! There is just always something to be said about trusting your instincts- you only have to remember that for the next time. I've only got some good advice because I've already made similar mistakes in my past. If I blocked my own vagina the same way I advise others to- I'd be golden:)
Author littlewhiterose Posted February 16, 2010 Author Posted February 16, 2010 I'm like that too, to a degree... or at least I used to be. So he just text me. TEXT! Not even call, which to me seems suspect-Saying "sorry I got your call really late yesterday, did you end up going?". Text? Whatever dude...
Vertex Posted February 16, 2010 Posted February 16, 2010 Am I the only one that thought this thread was going to be about something else?
Author littlewhiterose Posted February 20, 2010 Author Posted February 20, 2010 Accccck! he text me again. Any suggestions on what I should do or say?
Recommended Posts