rose45 Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 I was supposed to go on a second date last night..he called me wednesday and asked and also said i could call or text him. I call saturday and he called me back a few minutes later and asked what i wanted to do later etc i said he can decide so he said dinner and we agreed for about 8:30 The first date went really well, i have another thread on it..we met from online, met at a bar then he took me to a cafe, drove me home..we kissed and made out a little. He called last minute saying he got a bad phone call about a family member(don't want to give specific details of who etc) got into a fight over this and this and he got arrested..and how his other family member called him up crying etc so he said he has to go get him from jail. And i said wow im sorry and i still sounded nice and happy and pleasant b/c i didn't want to be mean about it. He said i am sorry i feel terrible and he said would call me later but i figured that wouldnt happen b/c i know situations like this---and if its true..it can take a long time for this type of stuff if someone is brought in late at night, on a holiday weekend etc I hope he didn't blow me off completely...he has still been going on the dating site..it was one date so i can't expect him not to i guess and i have been checking as well..i saw that he on the site about 4 hours ago. I am hoping he didn't blow me off. Should i text or call him tomorrow just to ask how is his family member? I am really tempted to do that..is that such a horrible move?
You'reasian Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 I was supposed to go on a second date last night..he called me wednesday and asked and also said i could call or text him. I call saturday and he called me back a few minutes later and asked what i wanted to do later etc i said he can decide so he said dinner and we agreed for about 8:30 The first date went really well, i have another thread on it..we met from online, met at a bar then he took me to a cafe, drove me home..we kissed and made out a little. He called last minute saying he got a bad phone call about a family member(don't want to give specific details of who etc) got into a fight over this and this and he got arrested..and how his other family member called him up crying etc so he said he has to go get him from jail. And i said wow im sorry and i still sounded nice and happy and pleasant b/c i didn't want to be mean about it. He said i am sorry i feel terrible and he said would call me later but i figured that wouldnt happen b/c i know situations like this---and if its true..it can take a long time for this type of stuff if someone is brought in late at night, on a holiday weekend etc I hope he didn't blow me off completely...he has still been going on the dating site..it was one date so i can't expect him not to i guess and i have been checking as well..i saw that he on the site about 4 hours ago. I am hoping he didn't blow me off. Should i text or call him tomorrow just to ask how is his family member? I am really tempted to do that..is that such a horrible move? Why text or call? Tell him you would like to see him face to face. People rely too much on texing these days.
alphamale Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 Should i text or call him tomorrow just to ask how is his family member? yes u can do that
D-Lish Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 I'd leave the ball in his court to contact you since he was the one that cancelled the date. It's safe to say if he calls to reschedule, he's interested- if he doesn't, he isn't.
Author rose45 Posted February 14, 2010 Author Posted February 14, 2010 (edited) should he have called by now? or its a little weird because its valentines day and we arent really together; only one date. was it bad i still sounded pleasant and happy on the phone with him cancelling? its hard with online dating because me seeing that he was on the site a few hours ago, it makes me anxious about him meeting someone else..i really liked him..so i guess i wonder if i should take the chance and call tomorrow since he has seemed interested so far. I was debating about today but its valentines day and i shouldnt make myself so available to text him today and ask about his family? Edited February 14, 2010 by rose45
Art_Critic Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 Being that he had been on the dating site multiple times since his cancellation then I would think you were blown off with a lie. He may have just blown you off because of Valentines Day but I doubt it..
D-Lish Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 Being that he had been on the dating site multiple times since his cancellation then I would think you were blown off with a lie. Yes, I wondered this as well. That's why I wouldn't contact him to see how things went. I am always suspicious of people that go into too much detail with excuses- it makes me believe they have something to hide.
Author rose45 Posted February 15, 2010 Author Posted February 15, 2010 that's a pretty weird lie..it wasnt really too much detail..it was like a minute phone call and he explained it like it was the truth(of course there are pathological liars out there lol)..could have just said got caught up with work or something i dont know if i am making excuses but i figured why would he not have time to check the site out or the e-mail etc..i dont know if he considers it weird to contact me today because its valentines day..our date that was supposed to happen yesterday was just a regular date..no mention of valentines was really mentioned and i wasnt looking at it like that either. one friend said she doesnt think its bad to call and 3 others say he cancelled last minute even if it was for a good reason..he should call you
Art_Critic Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 that's a pretty weird lie..could have just said got caught up with work or something So weird it is working.. you believe it.. If you really think the guy is still interested in you then why not call him and ask out last night panned out ?
You'reasian Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 So weird it is working.. you believe it.. If you really think the guy is still interested in you then why not call him and ask out last night panned out ? get ready for 1) an excuse...lol or 2) a scenario update that will lead to nowhere
Author rose45 Posted February 15, 2010 Author Posted February 15, 2010 so you think what he said was a total lie and bad situations dont come up? it actually baffles me how someone would lie about someone going to jail lol..so im trying to see the positive and thats its the truth i guess art..call him up valentines night?..shouldnt i wait a few days?
Art_Critic Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 Rose.. I think the part you are not seeing is that he isn't chasing you.. He was the one that canceled.. if he was interested in chasing you further then he would've updated you and kept you in the loop.. He hasn't done that.. Instead he has gotten online and continues to try and find someone to date.. If he saw you as a potential then he would be calling you instead of getting online. Sorry.. this is just how I see it.. I think at this point if he calls you then it will be only as a backburner deal..
D-Lish Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 so you think what he said was a total lie and bad situations dont come up? it actually baffles me how someone would lie about someone going to jail lol..so im trying to see the positive and thats its the truth i guess art..call him up valentines night?..shouldnt i wait a few days? No one can say for sure if he was lying. You're certainly somewhat suspicious or you wouldn't be asking for advice about it. You also saw him online when he was supposed to be out dealing with his cousin... He cancelled, he should be the one to call and reschedule, bottom line. It's alright to give someone the benefit of the doubt, but the ball is in his court to call you. If he is into you, nothing will stop him from calling for a second date, right?
Author rose45 Posted February 15, 2010 Author Posted February 15, 2010 very true! I think thats the problem with dating sites though..b/c if u are just "dating" you are going to continue to look on the site because why not? its so early on and you probably figure the other person is doing the same but thats a whole other thread. Thats why i think i feel more inclined to call him. i actually feel bad..i should have said let me know how everything goes..to show i am concerned etc
D-Lish Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 very true! I think thats the problem with dating sites though..b/c if u are just "dating" you are going to continue to look on the site because why not? its so early on and you probably figure the other person is doing the same but thats a whole other thread. Thats why i think i feel more inclined to call him. i actually feel bad..i should have said let me know how everything goes..to show i am concerned etc But that's exactly why you shouldn't call him. Sometimes people feel the need to keep reminding someone they are interested in, that they are available - that will rarely work in your favour. You don't want to give him the impression you are an option. Trust me, wait and see if he calls - it's up to him to do so since he cancelled.
hopesndreams Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 Even if he does call you again, be wary. It sounds as though you are an option if he can't get anyone else to date from "the site". Also, why are you driving yourself crazy for this guy after only 1 date???
Leia Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 Even if he does call you again, be wary. It sounds as though you are an option if he can't get anyone else to date from "the site". Also, why are you driving yourself crazy for this guy after only 1 date??? My thoughts exactly. Why don't you go on that site and start looking around for other potential men?
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