Depressed? I am... each and everyday

[Estranged]

So like my username suggests, i've always felt lonely. When it comes to people, i've almost always been treated unfairly.

 

Some say having a negative attitude will cause one not to have friends/long term relationships etc... Well in my case i like to think it's other way round. All i ever wanted is to be accepted and the only thing i get in return is being treated like garbage. Last time i made a so-called friend, she found nothing better than talk in my back (How i came to know that is pointless)

 

I've been so ****ing depressed lately i haven't touched my guitar for months... In fact i've lost interest in everything i loved doing. Sometimes i just think of ending it all... The only thing stopping me is my family. Even then i don't know if i'll be able to keep on living like that.

 

I hate people so much you have no idea... People really equals 5h1t

[USMCHokie]

So like my username suggests, i've always felt lonely. When it comes to people, i've almost always been treated unfairly.

 

 

Explain this...how are you being treated unfairly...? Is it because of your negative attitude? Or something else?

[The Paper Knight]

Its sounds like you suffering from depression. This is a very serious problem and you should seek help, as it may get worse. Tell your family and go seek therapy.

 

You need to work on your own self-esteem and not look so inwardly on all the negatives in your life. one method I use is to write down all the positve things in your life even it is only a few. Family, health and talents are a good place to start.

 

I have walked this lonely road myself for the last several years, as I have struggled with cfs. There are always people worse off than yourself so you need to know what is good in your life so that you can appreciate it.

 

I hope this helps.

 

Good luck

[whichwayisup]

Pick up your guitar and start playing. Sing and write music, it's theraputic, and it will make you feel good.

 

Google cognitive behaviour therapy. This type of therapy could really help you so much. With the depression, with your frame of mind, your issues, fears, negative feelings. I hope you choose to beat this battle and work hard on you. Life is what you make it to be, and you are blessed with lots of talent, you do have a family who loves you, and if you let them, they will help you through this difficult time in your life. Don't give up, things are going to get better.

[Estranged]

Treated unfairly? hmm let's see: I make the effort to talking to people i've never met in whole life and i still get the 'shy' treatment + so-called friends trash-talking me or asking why i'm like this or that. I'm currently seeing a counselor regularly but it doesn't help for ****. "There are always people worse off than yourself so you need to know what is good in your life so that you can appreciate it" Which is why i'm feeling even worse coz im a ****ing hypocrite... What is cfs anyways?

[Estranged]

Pick up your guitar and start playing. Sing and write music, it's theraputic, and it will make you feel good.

 

Google cognitive behaviour therapy. This type of therapy could really help you so much. With the depression, with your frame of mind, your issues, fears, negative feelings. I hope you choose to beat this battle and work hard on you. Life is what you make it to be, and you are blessed with lots of talent, you do have a family who loves you, and if you let them, they will help you through this difficult time in your life. Don't give up, things are going to get better.

 

Talent? Last time i checked being a pseudo-geek and playing guitar were not chick magnets... at least not for me. If it worked for others good for them, it only shows how much of a freak i am. What's pissing me off is my efforts, however big or small, never really paid off

[whichwayisup]

I know you're in a really bad place now.. I'm trying to help you.

 

Get a new therapist, this one you have isn't working for you. A therapist who is trained in CBT can do wonders, but you have to want to change, get better and do the work so you can become less shy, become more confident, and live a happier life.

 

Oh so not true..MANY women love men who play guitar!

[Estranged]

I know you're in a really bad place now.. I'm trying to help you.

 

Get a new therapist, this one you have isn't working for you. A therapist who is trained in CBT can do wonders, but you have to want to change, get better and do the work so you can become less shy, become more confident, and live a happier life.

 

Oh so not true..MANY women love men who play guitar!

 

Yeah i appreciate but i guess being short thin and fkin ugly beats my so-called talents when it comes to women. I must be the only one on this fked up world who can't attract a single chick despite being a fkin guitarist. I guess no matter what they will always avoid me like cancer Concerning friends well i learned the hard way i cant really trust anyone. It's not that i dont want to change but i have the impression that the payoff will never happen. I've tried so much and always failed

[The Paper Knight]

Treated unfairly? hmm let's see: I make the effort to talking to people i've never met in whole life and i still get the 'shy' treatment + so-called friends trash-talking me or asking why i'm like this or that. I'm currently seeing a counselor regularly but it doesn't help for ****. "There are always people worse off than yourself so you need to know what is good in your life so that you can appreciate it" Which is why i'm feeling even worse coz im a ****ing hypocrite... What is cfs anyways?

 

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome - believe me you don't want your worst enemy to have to suffer this.

[whichwayisup]

THis is why I strongly urge you to seek CBT. It's a different type of therapy and one that WILL help you change your attitude, help you gain self confidence, self love, self respect.

[Estranged]

THis is why I strongly urge you to seek CBT. It's a different type of therapy and one that WILL help you change your attitude, help you gain self confidence, self love, self respect.

 

Well, i was suggested to see a shrink by none other that my current counselor herself. I'm not expecting anything grand though... that whole alienation is killing me slowly but surely

Edited February 14, 2010 by Estranged
used wrong term

[The Paper Knight]

Well, i was suggested to see a shrink by none other that my current counselor herself. I'm not expecting anything grand though... that whole alienation is killing me slowly but surely

 

I agree with whichwayisup and seek CBT. I will be doing a course this year myself. Don't worry you are not the only guy out there dancing with the devil.

[pie2]

I'm so sorry for your pain. I think that humanity will always disappoint, in one way or another. Most everyone will hurt you at one point, if they're around long enough. My suggestion is to fill up some free time by volunteering at a local non-profit agency, or church. For example, at a homeless shelter, woman's shelter, Special Olympics, etc. You'll be putting your energies into people who can appreciate your help, and you'll realize that life could be a lot worse.

 

I know you're suffering right now. But it can, and will get better. Just don't give up!

[Estranged]

I'm so sorry for your pain. I think that humanity will always disappoint, in one way or another. Most everyone will hurt you at one point, if they're around long enough. My suggestion is to fill up some free time by volunteering at a local non-profit agency, or church. For example, at a homeless shelter, woman's shelter, Special Olympics, etc. You'll be putting your energies into people who can appreciate your help, and you'll realize that life could be a lot worse.

 

I know you're suffering right now. But it can, and will get better. Just don't give up!

 

Well just seeing them and how they are able to cope with their problems when they are even worse than mine will make matters worse. It just makes me ask myself wtf i'm doing in this world.

[josie54]

Hey there,

 

Women do like musicians--or creative types in general. We like humor. We like to laugh. But we also will avoid negative vibes, consciously or subconsciously. My guess is that even when you're approaching people, you're somehow convinced that it's going to go badly. If that comes across (and I'm sure it does), people will try to avoid that vibe--i.e., they'll try to avoid you. Negative also attracts negative, so the people you are bringing into your life might be just the sort to do what you expect them to do--turn on you.

 

And let go of the "ugly" part--looks are irrelevant when it comes to depression. There are plenty of people out there who aren't classically beautiful who draw people to them because their inner selves are positive and bright. So, I think you've got to focus on fighting your depression first, and reaching out to people second.

 

I wholeheartedly agree that you should keep up with therapy to treat your depression (switching therapists if the one you have isn't working). You might also try taking a class in something, just to learn something new and focus on something outside yourself. I also agree that you should try to volunteer somewhere--teach kids to play guitar at a camp, build a Habitat for Humanity house, help with Special Olympics as someone else said, work at a shelter--whatever. Just work with a group toward a larger goal and get outside your own head for a while.

 

I don't think that seeing that their problems are worse will make you feel worse--I think that seeing how they cope with their problems and get on with life in spite of their problems might just give you the push you need. Remember, positive attracts positive. You're afraid their positive attitudes will make you feel worse, but I think surrounding yourself with an atmosphere of hope and activity will rub off on you, if you'll only put yourself in that environment.

 

I know that's a tough step to take, though, when you're depressed. You don't have any energy right now. But you have to find the energy to take the first step, and then momentum will help you from there. Also know that there are many people who are fighting depression right now. It's a disease, like heart disease. If you look at it like a disease that deserves to be fought, I've found that can be helpful as well to help you take action.

[Estranged]

Hey there,

 

Women do like musicians--or creative types in general. We like humor. We like to laugh. But we also will avoid negative vibes, consciously or subconsciously. My guess is that even when you're approaching people, you're somehow convinced that it's going to go badly. If that comes across (and I'm sure it does), people will try to avoid that vibe--i.e., they'll try to avoid you. Negative also attracts negative, so the people you are bringing into your life might be just the sort to do what you expect them to do--turn on you.

 

And let go of the "ugly" part--looks are irrelevant when it comes to depression. There are plenty of people out there who aren't classically beautiful who draw people to them because their inner selves are positive and bright. So, I think you've got to focus on fighting your depression first, and reaching out to people second.

 

I wholeheartedly agree that you should keep up with therapy to treat your depression (switching therapists if the one you have isn't working). You might also try taking a class in something, just to learn something new and focus on something outside yourself. I also agree that you should try to volunteer somewhere--teach kids to play guitar at a camp, build a Habitat for Humanity house, help with Special Olympics as someone else said, work at a shelter--whatever. Just work with a group toward a larger goal and get outside your own head for a while.

 

I don't think that seeing that their problems are worse will make you feel worse--I think that seeing how they cope with their problems and get on with life in spite of their problems might just give you the push you need. Remember, positive attracts positive. You're afraid their positive attitudes will make you feel worse, but I think surrounding yourself with an atmosphere of hope and activity will rub off on you, if you'll only put yourself in that environment.

 

I know that's a tough step to take, though, when you're depressed. You don't have any energy right now. But you have to find the energy to take the first step, and then momentum will help you from there. Also know that there are many people who are fighting depression right now. It's a disease, like heart disease. If you look at it like a disease that deserves to be fought, I've found that can be helpful as well to help you take action.

 

Well. I recently tried speed dating, just faking positive emotions. It actually kinda worked. i've even been told there that i "had a nice smile"... yeah right So the 'best' thing that happened that night was ME giving MY number. can you believe that... and yeah i mentioned my hobbies. Guess they all want to avoid me like cancer no matter what...

 

I'm not against trying something new, as long as children ain't involved. I so hate them too. But it's gonna be hard without a fkin job...

 

I may try seeing a shrink. I've got nothing to lose. Yeah i'm sick and i'm a freak.

[Malenfant]

So like my username suggests, i've always felt lonely. When it comes to people, i've almost always been treated unfairly.

 

Some say having a negative attitude will cause one not to have friends/long term relationships etc... Well in my case i like to think it's other way round. All i ever wanted is to be accepted and the only thing i get in return is being treated like garbage. Last time i made a so-called friend, she found nothing better than talk in my back (How i came to know that is pointless)

 

I've been so ****ing depressed lately i haven't touched my guitar for months... In fact i've lost interest in everything i loved doing. Sometimes i just think of ending it all... The only thing stopping me is my family. Even then i don't know if i'll be able to keep on living like that.

 

I hate people so much you have no idea... People really equals 5h1t

 

 

other people wont change, the only thing that will make your life any better is how you handle the way people behave. the therapy will help with that.

 

believe me, i really do know how much you hate people. i've been there.

[Estranged]

other people wont change, the only thing that will make your life any better is how you handle the way people behave. the therapy will help with that.

 

believe me, i really do know how much you hate people. i've been there.

 

i can't really think of another way of how to deal with the standards set by society... i'm just hoping therapy can do something...

[whichwayisup]

what you put into therapy is what you get out of it.

 

If you want to change, become happy, self confident, then you'll keep an open mind and let the therapist guide you. It's hard work, but it DOES pay off!

 

Please, do yourself one favour..Begin today. Stop putting yourself down and giving yourself names. You're not a freak. You're a normal guy who has self esteem issues, a guy who has problems, like everyone else in this world, and is going do something about it.

 

Try CBT, it really will help.

[Estranged]

ok that shrink sucked. a 30 mins appointment? WTF. the only thing i got from that is confirmation of my depressed state. pfff i didn't even bother mentioning that CBT stuff. i was too pissed off. he did propose anti-depressants though which is of course outta qs. i think i'll go to my counselor 1 last time and see what's coming out of it...

[skydiveaddict]

ok that shrink sucked. a 30 mins appointment? WTF. the only thing i got from that is confirmation of my depressed state. pfff i didn't even bother mentioning that CBT stuff. i was too pissed off. he did propose anti-depressants though which is of course outta qs. i think i'll go to my counselor 1 last time and see what's coming out of it...

 

 

I would listen to him about the anti-depressants.. I was VERY depressed last time I got back from Afghanistan. The dr. put me on meds and within a month I was my old self again.

[whichwayisup]

Why didn't you mention the CBT?

 

Anyway, please google cbt and your city, some names of therapists should come up in a search, or call your local hospital, do a search for anxiety clinics too. BE active here. Getting pissed off and fed up isn't going to help you, if anything , it'll just push you backwards if you don't fight hard.

 

IT could very well be this shrink you're seeing isn't the one to help you.

 

What happened during that 30mins? Also, I do find it odd that the session was short, usually it's an hour.

[Estranged]

I would listen to him about the anti-depressants.. I was VERY depressed last time I got back from Afghanistan. The dr. put me on meds and within a month I was my old self again.

 

He gave me the 3 types of side-effects associated with anti-depressants and seriously i don't wanna go thru that BS, especially not now

Why didn't you mention the CBT?

 

Anyway, please google cbt and your city, some names of therapists should come up in a search, or call your local hospital, do a search for anxiety clinics too. BE active here. Getting pissed off and fed up isn't going to help you, if anything , it'll just push you backwards if you don't fight hard.

 

IT could very well be this shrink you're seeing isn't the one to help you.

 

What happened during that 30mins? Also, I do find it odd that the session was short, usually it's an hour.

 

I don't know. anyways, i think i'll just google that... Well during those 30 mins he basically asked me a few qs about myself. I also thought it would be an hour Strange though, seeing some **** band on tv made me want to pick up the guitar again. and this time i actually did, instead of just telling myself i'll do it tomorrow and never do it. my playing was sloppy at best but i didn't really forget anything, and i just felt better doing it. Don't know if i'll be in the same mood tomorrow though...

Edited February 18, 2010 by Estranged

[GrayClouds]

So like my username suggests, i've always felt lonely. When it comes to people, i've almost always been treated unfairly.

 

Some say having a negative attitude will cause one not to have friends/long term relationships etc... Well in my case i like to think it's other way round. All i ever wanted is to be accepted and the only thing i get in return is being treated like garbage. Last time i made a so-called friend, she found nothing better than talk in my back (How i came to know that is pointless)

 

I've been so ****ing depressed lately i haven't touched my guitar for months... In fact i've lost interest in everything i loved doing. Sometimes i just think of ending it all... The only thing stopping me is my family. Even then i don't know if i'll be able to keep on living like that.

 

I hate people so much you have no idea... People really equals 5h1t

 

Therapy will help.

 

There is other things that will to:

 

Exercise, yes I know you do not want to but get out for at 30 mins and burn some calories. Walk, run and lift. Push yourself to being tired. It is one of the most productive thing you can do to help depression.

 

Eat Well, make it your job to eat regularly and good health foods.

 

Take Vitamin suppliment of B's, D and omega 3's

 

Try St. John Wart or SAMe.

 

If those do not help get on meds, most side effect usually last only for a few weeks, and as long as your eating well and experiencing with gain is not an issue.

[whichwayisup]

I agree with GC!! Completey!