Jacky Posted February 17, 2010 Posted February 17, 2010 1 year and 3 months for me. Start in december
ladydesigner Posted February 17, 2010 Posted February 17, 2010 We were co-workers for 1+ year and really good friends. I would say it was an EA during that time (I didn't know what it was). Turned PA after he got laid off. PA started June '08 lasted 1.5 months. Then we remained friends for another year after that. I established NC in August of '09 and have remained so to this day.
carhill Posted February 17, 2010 Posted February 17, 2010 The title didn't specify OM or OW, so... Began April 1985; first long hiatus began March 1993. Resumed August 2007. Most recent hiatus September 2009. Marital roles reversed over the years.
Author jennie-jennie Posted February 17, 2010 Author Posted February 17, 2010 The title didn't specify OM or OW, so... Began April 1985; first long hiatus began March 1993. Resumed August 2007. Most recent hiatus September 2009. Marital roles reversed over the years. Of course I meant to include OM!
skylarblue Posted February 18, 2010 Posted February 18, 2010 Started seeing MM two weeks before Thanksgiving 2004. There was no courting period. PA started the day after we met.
oncall4u Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 I have actually been in an affair for 15 years... time flies We still speak several times a day, and see each every week. I swear sometimes he acts more like my H...more then my H does!
Author jennie-jennie Posted March 13, 2010 Author Posted March 13, 2010 I have actually been in an affair for 15 years... time flies We still speak several times a day, and see each every week. I swear sometimes he acts more like my H...more then my H does! Hi, oncall4u! Welcome to LS! May I ask if you are happy being the married other woman? If you are happy, I think it is neat that your affair has lasted so long!
Chingaling Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 Hmmm, I think we are at about twenty years pretty much... One of those re-connected things nobody believes in. We were together through high school until I was 21. He married someone else and moved away - absolutely broke my heart. He tracked me down after his divorce a few years later but by then I had married. We have been "in touch" ever since but it is only very recently that I admitted to him that I do want more... so we are working on that. I am hoping it will be soon...
Heather1 Posted March 14, 2010 Posted March 14, 2010 EA about a year, first kiss Sep 2008 & sex 2 months later. We go back & forth, right now off & NC because I'd like to have a full blown A & he's guilty as he could be. I think the statistics aren't that accurate, because besides you all, no one knows what's happening w/ me. I have found the reasons for A, the dynamics during, and the withdraw period to be extremely accurate. I'm just trying to stay positive about my outcome. If this is not what he wants, then I'm willing to let him go. so now I'm in withdraw!
wheelwright Posted March 14, 2010 Posted March 14, 2010 It started in my head June 21st 2008 - I knew I'd fallen. Three months till we connected from then - Sept 28th. Then lasted until June 21st 2009 (my DDay). Or for him, June 14th (his DDAy). So A lasted 9 months, or exactly a year depending how you look at it. He and his BS agreed to break up briefly May 8th. He broke my heart on May 10th when it became apparent he was going to work on his M. We had both been thinking about the other for years before any of this - low level. I know all the days of the week of said dates. Can't remember the date we first had sex - but definitely remember all the other details of this event. At this point, I have spent 21 months thinking about that man all the time, in one way or another. This June 21st I will stop that.
oncall4u Posted March 15, 2010 Posted March 15, 2010 I am actually happy... it just works for us. There are reasons why we both have stayed married... our work schedules work out well and we literally have a love shack! Which makes it really easy and hard to stop! We do not talk to each other on Saturdays or Sundays... but he sneaks in a good night text every night - 7 days a week. Sometimes I still cant believe it has last all this time.
oncall4u Posted March 15, 2010 Posted March 15, 2010 Hi, oncall4u! Welcome to LS! May I ask if you are happy being the married other woman? If you are happy, I think it is neat that your affair has lasted so long! I am actually happy... it just works for us. There are reasons why we both have stayed married... our work schedules work out well and we literally have a love shack! Which makes it really easy and hard to stop! We do not talk to each other on Saturdays or Sundays... but he sneaks in a good night text every night - 7 days a week. Sometimes I still cant believe it has last all this time.
Author jennie-jennie Posted March 15, 2010 Author Posted March 15, 2010 I am actually happy... it just works for us. There are reasons why we both have stayed married... our work schedules work out well and we literally have a love shack! Which makes it really easy and hard to stop! We do not talk to each other on Saturdays or Sundays... but he sneaks in a good night text every night - 7 days a week. Sometimes I still cant believe it has last all this time. I think this is something to realize, that the good part of some affairs lasts a lifetime. :love:
Hazyhead Posted March 15, 2010 Posted March 15, 2010 I can answer this question definitively now, and for that I am grateful. 15 months. I often wonder about the reliability of statistics like this, how the hell do they quantify it? Who do they ask? What about all those (I wonder if this is far more than not) that remain undisclosed?
ladydesigner Posted March 15, 2010 Posted March 15, 2010 At this point, I have spent 21 months thinking about that man all the time, in one way or another. This June 21st I will stop that.I like this wheelwright. Can I jump on this bandwagon? I think I will do the same. On July 21st, the day my XAP ended things with me, I will purge him from my mind completely
ContemplatingTheEnd Posted March 16, 2010 Posted March 16, 2010 I have officially just entered the long-term affair category, as of March 13. It is easy to remember when we met because we met on Friday the 13. I should have taken that as a bad sign...... A couple pathetic attempts at NC but none as of late. I am absolutely amazed at the affairs that have lasted 10+ years. As bad as this sounds, I wish I could be happy in this type of situation because I have fallen so hard for my MM. But alas, we are in different stages in our lives and I'm single and still need/want to find that man I spend my life with... whether that's married or not, who knows. Believe it or not, I'm a bit cynical about the idea of marriage at this point.
Author jennie-jennie Posted March 16, 2010 Author Posted March 16, 2010 I have officially just entered the long-term affair category, as of March 13. It is easy to remember when we met because we met on Friday the 13. I should have taken that as a bad sign...... A couple pathetic attempts at NC but none as of late. I am absolutely amazed at the affairs that have lasted 10+ years. As bad as this sounds, I wish I could be happy in this type of situation because I have fallen so hard for my MM. But alas, we are in different stages in our lives and I'm single and still need/want to find that man I spend my life with... whether that's married or not, who knows. Believe it or not, I'm a bit cynical about the idea of marriage at this point. So very true. I just had a talk with my teenage daughter about marriage. I asked her what she thought about the marriage vows. She said "You state your intention and hope to stay together with another person. But if things change, you are not bound by them to stay." I told her she is wiser than many adults. :love: I love her!
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