Lucky555 Posted February 13, 2010 Posted February 13, 2010 I have been in a relationship for a month. I spent a night with him and we had a great time. Everything is good except he didn't mention anything about valentines day. I think its an important day when you write someone a poem or even make a card saying how much you "care" about them. I have not brought up the subject of valentines day since we have been together a month. HOWEVER, I am feeling like being alone on that day when i am in relationship is a bit ODD! Can anyone tell me if i am right to think something about v-day should be done if your in a relationship? A card, flowers, a piece of candy!!! Just to show that person is important to you?
greatgirlfriend Posted February 13, 2010 Posted February 13, 2010 I am in the same situation, and yes a month is too early. This is why I generally avoid dating guys until the spring because of this. Now if we are still dating next Valentines Day I'll expect things (and I hope by then we are either engaged, talking about getitng engaged or living together).
Author Lucky555 Posted February 13, 2010 Author Posted February 13, 2010 thankyou greatgirlfriend! I was not sure what to expect on V-day with a month long relationship. Part of me says if he doesn't do anything then he really doesn't care at all. Another part of me says its only a month and the least I could expect is a happy v-day. We are intimate with each other so this is why i have mixed feelings.
greatgirlfriend Posted February 13, 2010 Posted February 13, 2010 thankyou greatgirlfriend! I was not sure what to expect on V-day with a month long relationship. Part of me says if he doesn't do anything then he really doesn't care at all. Another part of me says its only a month and the least I could expect is a happy v-day. We are intimate with each other so this is why i have mixed feelings. You're welcome. I'm not imtimate with my guy (we kiss and lightly touch but that's it) so I guess it doesn't bother me as much. Doesn't mean he doesn't care because he doesn't want to get together. A month is really an early dating relationship that is still struggling to see where it will go. I feel the same way about Christmas too (I don't expect a gift until I reach the three month stage).
frenchgirl Posted February 13, 2010 Posted February 13, 2010 A guy does too much and we dump him. A guy doesn't do enough and we still dump him. Then we all end up on this forum talking about it! Whether he cares or not depends on his attitude with you on a daily basis -- not just on Valentine's Day. Is he nice and considerate to you, generally speaking?
Vintage79 Posted February 13, 2010 Posted February 13, 2010 Well, what have you done for the guy? Have you bought him candy, cards, wrote him poems, etc. and are just waiting to give these items to him? Have you asked him to spend Valentine's Day weekend with you? Seriously, believe it or not, the girl has to put in some effort too. In the end, your disappointment is just as much, if not more, your fault than his, due to potential lack of effort/action on your part, potentially unrealistic expectations, or poor communication of your expectations/desires. Moreover, a lot of people could care less about Valentine's Day - it's a fictional holiday designed explicitly to sell cards and other cheesy items...basically, it's not important to many people, so failure to communicate the importance of this day to him is your fault, and as such, I would have to say most of the disappointment/blame is your fault, not his...probably not what you wanted to hear, but you need to be realistic.
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