Estranged Posted February 13, 2010 Posted February 13, 2010 I don't know if it 100% fits the purpose of this forum but anyway... I've managed to actually fulfill a lifelong dream (whether i deserve it or not is another story) So i just assumed that things would be better after that, especially concerning relationships. I've been single for all my life and a hopeless part of me is still searching for that special someone, or just anything. In a nutshell, however positive my outlook is, my journey always ends in failure. So now im feelin sad and i'm having these suicidal thoughts coming back to me again and i feel like such a fkin hypocrite for feeling that... Don't bother to answer if you don't want to. I just needed to write everything down... and im certainly not worth it - Estranged
Tony T Posted February 13, 2010 Posted February 13, 2010 You write that a "hopeless" part of you is still searching for that special someone. Well, if you abandon all hope you won't find anyone. Get a positive attitude and don't put a time limit on it. Some people wait many years for the right person to come along. You should give yourself a great deal of credit for not settling. Now, put on a smile, get yourself some hope and get out there and live. Don't look so hard. People can sense desperation. Just let it happen...I promise it will.
You'reasian Posted February 13, 2010 Posted February 13, 2010 I don't know if it 100% fits the purpose of this forum but anyway... I've managed to actually fulfill a lifelong dream (whether i deserve it or not is another story) So i just assumed that things would be better after that, especially concerning relationships. I've been single for all my life and a hopeless part of me is still searching for that special someone, or just anything. In a nutshell, however positive my outlook is, my journey always ends in failure. So now im feelin sad and i'm having these suicidal thoughts coming back to me again and i feel like such a fkin hypocrite for feeling that... Don't bother to answer if you don't want to. I just needed to write everything down... and im certainly not worth it - Estranged Life is a constant journey. You've got a negative attitude about things - see, you've fulfilled a lifelong dream (congratulations - whatever that is) and then you say your journey ends in failure - which is clearly not true, considering you just fulfilled a lifelong dream . Keep achieving goals, meeting people and developing relationships. It will happen.
Author Estranged Posted February 13, 2010 Author Posted February 13, 2010 Life is a constant journey. You've got a negative attitude about things - see, you've fulfilled a lifelong dream (congratulations - whatever that is) and then you say your journey ends in failure - which is clearly not true, considering you just fulfilled a lifelong dream . Keep achieving goals, meeting people and developing relationships. It will happen. yeah but life doesn't stop at fulfilling this dream... developing relationships??? pfff last time i trusted someone new, i found out that c**t was talking in my back... i wouldn't normally care but i really thought she liked me (as a friend, i wasn't into her) obviously i have zero interest in talking to her again... this was a period when i was regaining faith in society and bam! big time disappointment. i still socialize though, just to keep appearances but i soooo don't trust nor like anyone...
You'reasian Posted February 13, 2010 Posted February 13, 2010 yeah but life doesn't stop at fulfilling this dream... True. Life goes on. developing relationships??? pfff last time i trusted someone new, i found out that c**t was talking in my back... i wouldn't normally care but i really thought she liked me (as a friend, i wasn't into her) obviously i have zero interest in talking to her again...this was a period when i was regaining faith in society and bam! big time disappointment. i still socialize though, just to keep appearances but i soooo don't trust nor like anyone... Tieing one woman's behavior to 'faith in society' is unbalanced. Why not tie your actions and contributions and those around you or around the world even to faith in society? Take your time searching for that quality woman and bam! she'll be like no other woman you've had before in a good way... Trust is a great thing. Your response seems more of a reaction to your recent upset. Time can help you overcome this.
Author Estranged Posted February 13, 2010 Author Posted February 13, 2010 yeah i guess feeling suicidal over that b**** and society in general is even more unbalanced but i still can't stop thinking about that huge let down... and no therapy didn't help
scatterd Posted February 13, 2010 Posted February 13, 2010 HAVE YOU BEEN ON AN ANTI DEPRESSENT I KNOW I FEEL LIKE IT MT SELF SOMETIMES BUT I DONT TAKE ACTION BECAUSE USALLY IT CHANGES FOR THE BETTER.
Author Estranged Posted February 14, 2010 Author Posted February 14, 2010 no i never tried and never will... i guess that kind of crap will make me too delusional like make me starting to think society doesn't suck for e.g.
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