abdellost Posted February 12, 2010 Posted February 12, 2010 (edited) its been almost 3 weeks since i last talked to her. she broke up,due to stress and her willingness to be able to do what she wants (never held her back, she held me back from doing so much that i ended up doing the same to her) anyways i keep getting responses from people saying she was never loyal, shes cheating blah blah blah. People that dont know us or our relationship. her best friends who used to be my friends yelled and got mad at me for thinking she cheated, but they didnt even know we broke up until i went and cried to them.(our relationship was always meant for only us, no one knew anything personal about us, even best friends). i asked her those questions and she just went outraged saying if i think that ,then the last 5 years i never knew her. ANYHOW i never received full closure. she just shut me off completely and its killing me. we always talked about our problems but this time she just ended it very hurtful and gave me no chance to talk to her. we never took a break or slept mad at eachother. i send her an email with just closure,questions if theres someone else (i dont think so because how she was always on me,holding my hand, hugging my arm and crying that she never wants me to be hurt or mad at her even during an argument which we broke up the next day due to being part of it),and just closure on how she gave up on us after 5 years. bad move? i know i shouldnt contact but i wanna go on with my life and without closure its killing me. She never really checks her emails. I know she has internet connection but so far she hasnt logged on. i dunno. Just want closure. or should i give it another week then email it to her? i went to her college 3 weeks ago a few days after the break up for closure and understanding, she was so mad saying shes not herself and this is not who she wanted to be. that she did love me and i did mean the world to her but she cant go on pretending who shes not.she doesn't get the fact that she made us like this,controlling everything. We were perfectly fine,we had bigger arguments days before, like huge arguments. Actually we had a really bad argument a few days before the small argument because i hurt her and she thought i meant it.(normal couple arguments). so if it was someone else, she would have broken it off before right? Edited February 12, 2010 by abdellost
katelyn98 Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 In my opinion, u should give her sometime to calm down, to relax(same to u). hang out with some friends and stuff. Maybe u should give her a few days if not a week or more. I dont think u should give her too much time just incase she forgot about all this. Give her a few days, tat should be enough =)
Author abdellost Posted February 15, 2010 Author Posted February 15, 2010 Its been 20 days lol. nothing so far. I know she cant call or text because shes overseas at the moment for the last 15 days, but she has internet and could have emailed me back. i dunno
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 Put it this way: i keep getting responses from people saying she was never loyal, shes cheating blah blah blah. People that dont know us or our relationship These people have no reason to lie. Your girlfriend had every reason to lie. so if it was someone else, she would have broken it off before right? I would wager a large sum of money that she was laying the groundwork with another guy(s?) weeks before you broke up. People like this rarely break up first. They make sure they have a firm hold on someone else, and then break up.
blackbear_703 Posted February 15, 2010 Posted February 15, 2010 Hi abdellost-- Getting an e-mail from her in regards to closure may not bring the closure you seek. If she does reply to the e-mail, she may not be honest with you about being with another guy or the reasons for breaking up since she doesn't want to cause you anymore pain or because she feels guilty over breaking up with you. She could dance around the subject(s) and/or give you more vague reasons about why she broke up. Or she may not reply at all. Either way, you may never know the true reasons why she broke up with you...even after asking her straight up. It's even possible that if she is honest with you, the answers could be painful and devastating to hear.... All in all, the best thing you can do to find closure is to focus on finding peace in your heart and letting go of whatever you two had. It will take time, but you can do it without knowing exactly why things happened the way they did. It seems like half the time, true closure is difficult to find and we are only left with partial answers as to why they left us. If you do decide to e-mail her, just don't expect a reply back, or at least a truthful, thorough one. As for your mutual friends, what did she tell them about the break-up? It could be she did not give them an honest answer either, which would explain why they gave you an earful over the break-up and why they didn't know about it period. Good luck and hope this helps.
Author abdellost Posted February 16, 2010 Author Posted February 16, 2010 Thing is everyone, if you read my first and main thread, you would have understood what was going on clearly. Its just a long story that i did not want to bring it up. I couldn't see her 2 days before the break up, and she would cry because we haven't seen each other for a week! (it was actually 3 days but she kept saying it felt like a week lol). so i told her i might not be able to come and see her for long. she asks me just to stand in front of her house until she drives by so she can see my "gorgeous smile". Thing is, we're young, 20/19. together for 5 years. and her mom didnt like we were together ( we are overseas, Egypt to be exact, so the social life is much different). we had to sneak around to see each other, always tense and stressed cause of her mom. (couldnt talk to the mom until i finished college and had a career, Bs i know). but she was always happy when she was with me. she always said that i make her feel like there is no problems in the world and she would never stop laughing or smiling when i was with her. She really made me feel like i was so special to her. Thats why if she was seeing or considering another guy, she wouldn't have been all over me like this. She was traveling for the first time overseas for 2 weeks to see her dad so she was always sad and EXTRA LOVING because she was scared to miss me. we had a small argument, that seemed to be the last straw for her, so she broke it off and said some stuff i didn't understand, thats why i need closure. But i did make a new saying, "if anyone ever left you, its because of someone else. Because they think theirs someone better for them". its a bout rough, but i dunno, i feel like that now.
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