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Confessions... 3 months NC


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Posted

I don't know if maybe I'm doing this because of stages and its one of those things, or if its just 100% the truth and I've been denying it... but here goes.

 

I broke up with my ex almost 8 months ago. I did it because I wanted him to sit down with me and spend some 'alone' time together in that otherly world I seemed to fall into with him.

When in reality, I should have said to him, 'Hey let's spend some time together, I'm feeling kind of distant from you'... we ended things.

I guess I thought he was actually going to put up some fight.. but he didn't.

Hell, he next week, I was telling him I still loved him and didn't want to lose him.. that the words out of my mouth were wrong.

It was too late, and the damage was done. He was all about a friendship.. but nothing more.

I stuck with him for a while, hanging out etc, but my emotions got to me when he revealed 3 months down he was falling for another woman. It hurt a lot because it was a woman who he mentioned briefly before and I should have seen it coming. He also told me he was falling out of love with me before the breakup... but somehow I don't or don't want to believe that.

 

Anyways, I fear I'll always regret this because it truly was a big fault of my own. I can't play victim 100%. I still love him a lot and I'm almost happy for him to be with someone who actually loves him and won't put him through that stuff.

I'm hoping that by admitting this to you all, will maybe help lift all these emotions.

I don't want to regret this forever... it would seriously be the only thing I ever regretted...

 

thanks all.

Posted

I dont think you should feel guilt. It happened and it took both of you to make it fail. Its sad. Lowly had backed off so far in our relationship I couldnt have got him back and it could be the same for you. You will never know. The point is you have learnt from this and in your bright future will be better because you will see the signs. I will too.

 

I tried, you tried.

 

Nobby xx

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