MARINE_ONE Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 I will make this kinda short, but I want to give people who are just beginning this process an idea of how long things take. Granted I am sure the process is different for everyone. It has been 5 weeks today since DDay. Wow, I cannot believe how far I have come. It was sooooo f'ing hard at the beginning. For the first 2 weeks I literally cried every morning. I didn't think I would ever start to feel better. However, about two weeks ago I started feeling better each day. I will still have some mornings where I think about her.(although even when I do I realize I don't want her back. EVER!!) I can't say everyday is perfect, but gawd it is so much better than 3 weeks ago. Everyday I am finding things are getting better. I am working out again. (I think this has helped the most) I am seeing that I will have a life again, and I actually feel like it will be better than the one I had. I already spend more QUALITY time with my kids. No more being in the same house with them, but not hanging out. Now when I have them we do everything together. I think there are several reasons for this, but the biggest reason is that my stbxw is no longer the focus of my attention. I no longer have to spend every f'ing minute trying to make her happy. I no longer have to worry about her spending all our money. Wow, that is so liberating!!! My divorce is final in 8 days and I am actually happy knowing that. You could not have convinced me 3 weeks ago that I would even be okay with it, let alone happy about it. Whoever said time heals all wounds really knew what they were talking about. I can't imagine how I will feel in 6 months, but I can't wait to see either!!
whichwayisup Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 Glad that you're dealing with this well. Enjoy the days you feel great, take advantage of it..And when you have those more emotional or low days, remember they will pass, and it's just more of the grieving/loss of what "could have been." Hope your kids are doing okay.
Author MARINE_ONE Posted February 11, 2010 Author Posted February 11, 2010 Glad that you're dealing with this well. Enjoy the days you feel great, take advantage of it..And when you have those more emotional or low days, remember they will pass, and it's just more of the grieving/loss of what "could have been." Hope your kids are doing okay. Thanks!! They are doing much better. It is really weird. The more time she spends away from them the happier they seem. Except for my youngest. He is still holding out hope that we are getting back together. But I figure as long as he is loved he will eventually get over that.(fingers crossed)
theycallmeprincess Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 I am very happy to hear that you are progressing through, what I feel, is a very difficult time in your life. Please try to stay as positive as can be, love your children and rejoice in them, learn and heal from this, and I promise you will find love again.
fooled once Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 I will make this kinda short, but I want to give people who are just beginning this process an idea of how long things take. Granted I am sure the process is different for everyone. It has been 5 weeks today since DDay. Wow, I cannot believe how far I have come. It was sooooo f'ing hard at the beginning. For the first 2 weeks I literally cried every morning. I didn't think I would ever start to feel better. However, about two weeks ago I started feeling better each day. I will still have some mornings where I think about her.(although even when I do I realize I don't want her back. EVER!!) I can't say everyday is perfect, but gawd it is so much better than 3 weeks ago. Everyday I am finding things are getting better. I am working out again. (I think this has helped the most) I am seeing that I will have a life again, and I actually feel like it will be better than the one I had. I already spend more QUALITY time with my kids. No more being in the same house with them, but not hanging out. Now when I have them we do everything together. I think there are several reasons for this, but the biggest reason is that my stbxw is no longer the focus of my attention. I no longer have to spend every f'ing minute trying to make her happy. I no longer have to worry about her spending all our money. Wow, that is so liberating!!! My divorce is final in 8 days and I am actually happy knowing that. You could not have convinced me 3 weeks ago that I would even be okay with it, let alone happy about it. Whoever said time heals all wounds really knew what they were talking about. I can't imagine how I will feel in 6 months, but I can't wait to see either!! So glad to hear you are doing so well! Congratulations!!
Author MARINE_ONE Posted February 11, 2010 Author Posted February 11, 2010 I am very happy to hear that you are progressing through, what I feel, is a very difficult time in your life. Please try to stay as positive as can be, love your children and rejoice in them, learn and heal from this, and I promise you will find love again. Find love again? Hmmm.... I think I am officially a confirmed bachelor. Don't get me wrong; I will still date, but I have NO desire for another long term relationship. Been there. Done that. I have always known one marriage would be all for me, and this experience has done nothing to change my mind about that. I am fully content to live the rest of my life by myself.( with the occasional guest of course)
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