SummerLady Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 I have been divorced for almost 2 years. Don't get me wrong, that marriage was not meant to be. I am glad it ended as we had many many issues that could not be resolved. The divorce was way messy as well. But my ex saw my friend out the other day and said to her that he missed being a family. I understand that, with the kids and all that part is always hard. I am not from a divorced family so that made me sad. I would never take him back or go back but that part is painful. Anyone feel that way?
PWSX3 Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 Must be something in the air. I've been divorced for almost a year & my former W in a email told me she misses me. When we are with someone it doesn't matter if it was a good relationship or bad, if we are human we still care to some point.
Doing it Since '78 Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 Must be something in the air. I've been divorced for almost a year & my former W in a email told me she misses me. When we are with someone it doesn't matter if it was a good relationship or bad, if we are human we still care to some point. just curious, how did you respond?
Author SummerLady Posted February 11, 2010 Author Posted February 11, 2010 just curious' date=' how did you respond?[/quote'] I didn't.. I have not spoken to him. I was just crushed when I heard it. Makes me feel like a failure...Like a bad parent, like a dissapointment. what do you say?
Ronni_W Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 I've been divorced 10 years. My decision and one of the best I've ever made for myself. And. There's always going to be a part of me that's sad about it. For me it's more about just being okay with the inner conflict. I mean, it doesn't feel like a "conflict" anymore. It just is what it is. Almost like, I don't like olives...but I sometimes eat 'em. I can do both, just not at the same time.
Author SummerLady Posted February 11, 2010 Author Posted February 11, 2010 I've been divorced 10 years. My decision and one of the best I've ever made for myself. And. There's always going to be a part of me that's sad about it. For me it's more about just being okay with the inner conflict. I mean, it doesn't feel like a "conflict" anymore. It just is what it is. Almost like, I don't like olives...but I sometimes eat 'em. I can do both, just not at the same time. I understand that.....I get it. Its just weird.....
Ronni_W Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 Yes, exactly. It just gets...less weird as time goes by. At least, for me.
whichwayisup Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 It's sad because when you two got married, divorce back then wasn't a thought or a possibility. It's sad when two people fall inlove, build a life together, create a family - And it falls apart. Intentionally or not.
Angel1111 Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 When you marry, you share hopes and dreams about a life and future together. When that ends, no matter how much it needed to end, those hopes and dreams die hard. And it hurts. Every now and then it's going to come back up and remind you. But it should also remind that you did all you could and there was no way to make it work.
Doing it Since '78 Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 I didn't.. I have not spoken to him. I was just crushed when I heard it. Makes me feel like a failure...Like a bad parent, like a dissapointment. what do you say? Don't beat yourself up about it, you guys tried, and it just didn't work. I do understand where you are coming from though. It makes the whole ordeal real and fresh again
PWSX3 Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 just curious' date=' how did you respond?[/quote'] I didn't respond. She was the one that wanted the divorce not me. I've worked hard to move forward with my life & at this time I don't want to go back & get hurt again. It did make me feel good in a way, maybe she realizes it wasn't all my fault like she tried to make it sound like.
ilmw Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 I didn't respond. She was the one that wanted the divorce not me. I've worked hard to move forward with my life & at this time I don't want to go back & get hurt again. It did make me feel good in a way, maybe she realizes it wasn't all my fault like she tried to make it sound like. Good! It was the same for me. My ex has on several occassions txt me telling me how great a man I am, and what I good dad I am. She even recently called me... all weepy and apologised to me for not working harder at our marriage... All I replied was... "Ummm...thanks" and left it at that. Hey PW
Author SummerLady Posted February 11, 2010 Author Posted February 11, 2010 Good! It was the same for me. My ex has on several occassions txt me telling me how great a man I am, and what I good dad I am. She even recently called me... all weepy and apologised to me for not working harder at our marriage... All I replied was... "Ummm...thanks" and left it at that. Hey PW That is the best thing really. Its like my grandmother always use to say, "What's done is done." I guess maybe the guilt always lingers a tad, we were all raised with guilt even if we did nothing wrong. Oh well....Life goes on.
2.50 a gallon Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 Same here A month after we separated, actually I kicked her out as I caught her with an OM, she came back wanting to try again. For the next 4 years, I got cards and even gifts, for Xmas, my B-Day and Valentines day. The first couple of cards caught me off guard, as there was no return address, so I didn't know whom it was from. "Miss you", "Thinking of you", "Call Me", etc. It wasn't wierd, but it hurt, after the first couple I learned to trash them unopened.
sumdude Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 Good! It was the same for me. My ex has on several occassions txt me telling me how great a man I am, and what I good dad I am. She even recently called me... all weepy and apologised to me for not working harder at our marriage... All I replied was... "Ummm...thanks" and left it at that. Hey PW ILMW! How ya been? Long time no post! Too bad it took her so long to see it.. after everything you did to try to make it work. I haven't heard from my ex in over a year, don't expect to hear anything either. She remarried right away to the OM. At one point she did sort of apologize... sort of.
aimchase Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 Absolutely I understand! My whole family thinks my ex is a real problem who can't be trusted. Everyone tells me to get over her, and that i'll find someone far better. I know that they're right in that she has got issues and will be a problem in many ways to whoever is with her. If I was not emotionally involved i'd see that too and advise the same. But i'm not, and I do still have feelings for her that won't go. She spoke of trying again only a few weeks ago, then as quick as you like revoked that and went in pursuit of any other men that would take an interest in her. The right decision is to let it go, but it's so painful and a part of me just can't, or is at least going to take a long time. We've been apart now for seven months.
PWSX3 Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 Good! It was the same for me. My ex has on several occassions txt me telling me how great a man I am, and what I good dad I am. She even recently called me... all weepy and apologised to me for not working harder at our marriage... All I replied was... "Ummm...thanks" and left it at that. Hey PW Hello my friend, wow it's been a while. Good to hear you are still alive.:D Could you PM your email address, would like to get caught up on how things are going....:cool:
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