Funky Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 hey forum. I need some advice, help, anything!! k so I was with this girl for 3 years, we had a house, trying to add to the family since she already had a son and I thought everything was great until she dumped me, sold the house. while we still lived together she started dating and sleeping with some other dude and continued doing so until about 1 month before she decided to come back. She really broke my heart and I was in millions of pieces. on my part I started dating someone after we were out of the house and called everything off because I could stop thinking of her. just wanted to give a bit of background... now she's come back begging for me, closed her fb, changed cells, sees a psych all to prove everything to me aboit how much she loves me and regrets everything. I have no idea what to do, I love her but she hurt me so much. I go on dates and feel guilty, no girl I've met compares. Yet we broke up more then once and I don't know if things would really change even though she said they would... I said I need time to think and she said its either yes or no.. What to do, so confused!!!
Author Funky Posted February 10, 2010 Author Posted February 10, 2010 its been pending 3 months and we've talked almost everyday since she came back, she's tired of waiting on my decision
Sadbutrelieved Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 She needs to realize you can't just jump right back into it. If she's really serious, she will let you come to a decision without trying to rush you.
Ronni_W Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 its been pending 3 months and we've talked almost everyday since she came back, she's tired of waiting on my decision Yup. You need to make a decision. All you can do is base it on the information, instincts and feelings that you currently have...including your own desires and needs, your own assessment of her sincerity and commitment to her therapy work, etc. What else do you need from her, in terms of commitments, promises, goals, priorities? On top of that, consider your own current relationship skills and effective coping strategies -- do YOU have what it takes to be a good partner and resolve future differences, problems, conflicts in interest, etc.? You're never going to have a guarantee that things will work out perfectly. You just have to make your best-informed decision...and add some Trust and Faith. If you think the missing ingredient might be your 100% forgiveness of her prior bad acts, I'd suggest the book 'Forgive for Love' by Fred Luskin. (And if that interests you, it's on major sale at BookCloseOuts.com) Best of luck. It's a difficult decision...but you're gonna gotta make it. In your heart of hearts, what do you REALLY want to do?
kwyser Posted February 12, 2010 Posted February 12, 2010 Nobody can answer this except for you. You need to sit down and think ong and hard about what you really want and if she can give that to you, then make your decision.
Recommended Posts