themusichorse Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 Hi everyone!! I am new here and I need some advice. My ex and I always fought alot about stupid things and something bad happened over christmas. I went overboard and he told me he wanted to break up with me and I threatened to kill myself. He ended up coming over to my house to come and stop me and he, he stopped me but there were three marks left on his left arm..and I felt so horrible about it and i am lucky that i didnt get into major trouble because i could have lost everything, but i still feel horrible. Everyone told me to move on and to forget about him, but I just wish i could take it back and he could forgive me. He told his parents what happened and his parents wont talk to me and his whole family hates me and doesn't support him being with me. He told me he never wanted to talk to me again and that he was trying to move on, so i finally left him alone and three days later he started talking to me and has been ever since. He will lose everything if his parents find out that he is talking to me again. But he seems to only want sex and I am not sure if thats true or not, just alot of people have told me the only reason he wants me back is because he wants sex, but he told me i am more than a sexual object to him...and that he loves me and i need to trust him. Please advice please!!!!!!!!!! Does he only want me back for sex or should i just move on??Does he want me for more than that? I have been with him for almost 2 years.
TaraMaiden Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 When there's a doubt like that in your mind, it should be a huge red flag. if the question even arises, then it's just wrong, isn't it? I posted advice in your other thread. leave this alone, move on, let him live his life, and you live yours. Cut off all contact, and be done with this. There's no point to any of it. It's always going to be this loaded with baggage. And if his parents are so dead set against you being together, then deal with it. Making stupid manipulative remarks about killing yourself shows a real neediness and lack of self-esteem. You're not emotionally healthy enough to deal with a relationship. You've got to get yourself together, because this is not the way to go. you need to speak to your doctor about counselling and be referred to someone who can help you come to terms with yourself, and concentrate on making you feel better about yourself. He can't fix anything by being with you, and you feel used.
counterman Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 First, we do not know what he wants, only he knows that. A word of advice is that some guys would say anything to get sex even if it means saying I love you and want to be with you. Some guys even cry to try to get sex. Just bare that in mind. With your ex-boyfriend, think back to when you two were together. Was it all that great? Did you guys have issues in communicating and other aspects? Think carefully about this and be completely honest with yourself. Remember, he is your ex-boyfriend for a reason and there must have been issues when you two were together. Is that really what you want again? If he does get back together with you, will you threatened to harm yourself in any way if he chooses to leave? If you are not emotionally healthy, then it is not a good idea to be in a relationship. I personally think you should move on. Focus on yourself and take care, because that is what's most important. Oh, and no contact with him.
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