Latinguy Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 my wife keep inviting this guys from work for lunch, she even have lied to me about who invite who ( she ussually invite him). One time I ask to join the lunch and she came with the excuse that she will call me when the meeting is over, well, the meeting was over but she called me about 20 minutes later... She changed her email password ( a shared one) and sometime she sent him emails.. ( nothing wrong with that right?) . She keep invite him to lunch, even when I ask her to go out for lunch, she said, sorry <name>invite me. If the guy is out or sick, she sent email about how much she missed him and one time the guys was sick and she told him that stay home becuase she does not want get sick , but she does not mind sharing other thing with him... I am out of line here of she is coming strong with this guy...
Bleed Internal Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 she's having sex with him or planning to
Author Latinguy Posted February 9, 2010 Author Posted February 9, 2010 HE is married and no they are not having sex.
She's_NotInLove_w/Me Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 HE is married and no they are not having sex. What makes you so sure. Just because she's not having it with you? Think about it man? You and your 'marriage' are in need of a huge wake up call...
imagine Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 Tell his wife right away. Do not WARN her that you are doing this!
phineas Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 umm, your wife is blowing you off for lunch so she can go with another man? Speaking as a man whose wife did this to him & is now my STBXW i'd suspect affair. No woman even marginally intelligent or sane would think what she was doing was appropriate for a married woman.
eamherst14051 Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 Why don't you keep your mouth shut and go early or late to lunch and see what happens from a distance? Then beat the **** out of the slimly bastard!
She's_NotInLove_w/Me Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 The OP also stated in this below thread that there are intimacy issues in his household. She doesn't want sex other than once a month (or less), and he asks for it regularly. Sounds like she is at least emotionally attached to her lunch mate if not more... http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t220773/
Author Latinguy Posted February 9, 2010 Author Posted February 9, 2010 I forgot to mention that I have found in the shared home computer, search like: Impossible love How to make man to fall in love with you. Pheromones Poems about loving a married man...
Bryanp Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 I was going to say how would your wife feel if you always were going out to lunch with other women and blew her off for these other women? Now that I read your last post about finding things on your computer like poems about loving a married man; it is clear she is probably having sex with him. Her attitude indicates that she has no respect for you or your marriage. I am sorry but she is playing you for a total fool and you are accepting it.
Dexter Morgan Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 your wife isn't fit to be married. she finds time to go to lunch with other men, but not with you? if you haven't been married long, get rid of her.
mark982 Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 if he's a guy from your wifes work. i'd imagine that her employers would love to hear about this.
AsTearsGoBy Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 this is so sad but your wife is being unfaithful. that search history is absolutely damning evidence of her being unfaithful. best of luck to you.
Chrome Barracuda Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 Dude it's only a matter of time until you find irrefutable proof. Then what??? My advice dont hesitate to get to a lawyer asap. Find out your rights and start documenting because things are about to happen now that your on to her. She's either gonna be more defiant or get more sloppy. I dont think she even cares to tell you the truth. I would put him and her on blast and give her HR department a heads up! It's time you starting fighting back and getting your nutsack back in shape, your gonna need them for the fight ahead!
single Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 So sorry but the rest are right your wife is having an affair at least at em one but probably more. All the best whatever you decide to do I was in the same position but staggered along in the relationship suspecting things until I got dumped and all the blame and then I found out she had been and still is banging one of her co-workers.
Woman In Blue Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 HE is married and no they are not having sex. Never say never. Being naive will get you nowhere but having the rug yanked out from under you when you least expect it. It's quite clear she's involved with this guy.
Dexter Morgan Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 if he's a guy from your wifes work. i'd imagine that her employers would love to hear about this. only way it would matter to an employer or if the employer could legally do something about it is if his wife was the boss and the OM is a subordinate or the other way around. And what usually happens is the boss in the affair will get fired, but because of fear of reprisals from the subordinate, they usually will keep their job because even if it was consentual, the subordinate could file a harrassment suit.
Author Latinguy Posted February 11, 2010 Author Posted February 11, 2010 I am pretty sure they are not having sex, for I have been reading around (shared computer), she is the one that initiate the conversation, or lunch. Also I forgot to mention that she also wrote and email to a female friend something among the lines of " at this time I don't care to betray my principles, principles of family and everything that I was raised"... she said that was something about raising our son outside any religiuos education....... so ..
Bryanp Posted February 11, 2010 Posted February 11, 2010 I am sorry my friend but so often a betrayed spouse goes into denial which I believe you are in. You judge a person by their actions and not by their words and her actions speak volume. If the roles were reversed do you think your wife would accept your continuing disrespect and you hanging out with other women for lunch over her? You are in a fog my friend.
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 12, 2010 Posted February 12, 2010 If she knows you suspect her, she will do everything in her power to make sure you don't find anything out. Even if you did find something out, she would simply lie knowing that you want to believe her. The guy being married has nothing to do with whether something will happen or not. Trust me on that one.
mimidarlin Posted February 12, 2010 Posted February 12, 2010 Latin.. Your story is so familiar. My husband and I are separated at this moment in time all because of a "friend". I'm sure the relationship started friendly but it moved into more than friendship. The only reason it didn't progress to sex is because I caught them making out. She is married with two children, very active in her Catholic church and has a nice home. Yet she is willing to risk everything for a fling. I have asked my husband how this relationship progressed. Last spring I saw something that sent a red flag up for me but he swears he wasn't aware of how she behaved. She was sitting in a chair very close to him in his office and when I showed up unexpectedly she jumped up like she was on fire. I think she was pursuing him at this time. They had lunch together and she stopped by his office after work. This went on for months. Then she made her move. My husband is equally guilty. He may have made the first move if she hadn't beat him to it. He was obviously sending signals that he was receptive to it. Your wife is in a dangerous situation. Both of them are contemplating doing something inappropriate. They are emotionally intimate and working towards more. Investigate more and confront her with the computer evidence. Try to put a key logger program on the computer. I don't know how to do it but many LS contributors have recommended doing this.
phineas Posted February 12, 2010 Posted February 12, 2010 (edited) I am pretty sure they are not having sex, for I have been reading around (shared computer), she is the one that initiate the conversation, or lunch. Also I forgot to mention that she also wrote and email to a female friend something among the lines of " at this time I don't care to betray my principles, principles of family and everything that I was raised"... she said that was something about raising our son outside any religiuos education....... so .. Last yr on valentines day my wife met her boyfriend in a hotel around the corner from her work on her lunch hour. My wife swore to her friends up & down her BF was "just a friend" & how she would never do that after her friends found 100's of pictures of my wife with him on his myspace page. Hell, in a drunken tirade of tears she told a co-worker how I think she is cheating on me & how her BF is just a friend & that's why I kicked her out of her home. When she couldn't drive home to her apartment because she was too drunk, who did she call? Her BF. LOL! Too bad my friends work with her also & have seen OM picking her up at work. Your wife will bend reality to somehow justify her actions as not cheating. Mine sure did. Edited February 12, 2010 by phineas
seibert253 Posted February 12, 2010 Posted February 12, 2010 Latin you have 2 options here: 1. Continue to turn a blind eye on what's going on, (Ray Charles can see that your W either IS cheating, or IS GETTING READY to) 2. Gather evidence and confront her. The choice is yours.
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