sparky26m Posted February 8, 2010 Posted February 8, 2010 well i was doing soo well,,really starting to enjoy life again,,not mr miserable as i have been since she ended it in december,,, story is i was a jerk and left her( we lived together) last year as i was scared of commitment im 26 and wanted to live my youth!! idiot i know anyway she took me back in september but i wasnt focusing on it enough ,didnt talk to her for 2 weeks cos of silly work and she decided after 2.5 yrs enough was enough now i totally respect and understand ,,i was an idiot,,i got what i desreve and im learning more about myself through this experiance,,but what narks me is she wanted to see one guy after like a week basically scared him off as she wanted a relationship there and then,,then after xmas and 4 weeks of us being proper over ,,she is back with her ex of 8 yrs ago!! i dont know why,,maybe she real loves him,,always did,,but i still care for her and dont want her to get hurt,,and everyone even her told me he was a bad bf to her,,but she says he has changed! anyway saw her 2 weeks ago and paid her money i owe her ,,trying to sort my lie out etc,,we hug it out and it was cool nc for 2 weeks now she tells me there is post there for me! i know she is being nice ,,but as a guy moving on,,u dont want to see her texting u with kisses and asking if im ok and to take care its bs and i told her thanks but i changes my addresses and to bin the mail,,asked her if she had my passport as im going away on hols and now her attitude changed to one word answers,,uoset that im going away and moving on,,, what im supposed to feel like crap 4 ever!! no i want to be happy and after all she is the one desperate to prove she moved on,,fb status in a relationship etc etc and i did make mistakes of going on fb but i stopped them my mum told me bout her in a relationship,,so i looked and she has changed her settings and i cant see anytihng(( i deleted her btw)) why block me if u dont care what im doing? maybe her bf told her too,,anyway i have massivley digressed,,how can i stay nc if she keeps popping uo about silly little things,,but i guess she is just being nice ?
benjo0101 Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 My friend, I know the exact pain you are going through. My advice, which is ironic as it probably came from this forum anyways, is to force yourself not to reply. Get exactly what you need, passport etc from her but try and do it without seeing her. Send your mum round or something. Sounds lame, but if you see her you'll probably feel worse. Forget what she thinks, if she wants to make you feel like crap then to hell with her! You are yourself and noone else! Don't let her manipulate you, show her your moving on! Be strong man! I wasn't, I broke the back of it, now I feel like I'm in control. Still confused, but totally in control. Ever wanna talk jus shout.
twinklecat Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 Hey there sparky26m, I'm sorry for your loss, trust me though it will get better but it does take time Best thing for it is to go nc, stay away from her don't check fb, and if people try to talk to you about her and the new relationship, just tell them you're not interested. It's hard but it really is better for you, than torturing yourself. Use the nc to let go and focus on yourself, how you can grow and learn from this whole experience. ~Twinkle
Author sparky26m Posted February 9, 2010 Author Posted February 9, 2010 thanks benjo 4 advice,,yes im sending her a stamped envelope to send me bk passport,,,listen i messed up and pushed her away soo many times esp in last 6 months,,,i moved out etc ,,was selfish when she needed me i wasntt there after an operation she had,, i was a scared confused guy then,now i work on my issues with councelling etc,,but i just dont know why she is so desp to be in another long term thing so soon after us she says i lost her in summer and she got used to not having me around,,i understand that,but why come back in september when i asked her and tell me u want kids etc and will love me 4 eva,,,then all finished i do stay off fb,,trust me its been real hard,,i was getting healed i feel but her contacting me just blew me out,,,then i hear her current bf has met her family and friends already,,,after 4 weeks!!!!!!!!!!!1wtf now i know this girl is insecure as she wanted to movee in with me after 2 months!! but i do still love her ,but i guess i lost her trust and she wants comfort and security which she doesnt think i can give her,,,,just annoys me why girls have to be with someone,,,be single and get over that last person!!! oh and just to add an even stranger twist she poked my mum on fb!! wtf!! my mum messaged her on fb b4 xmas saying she was sorry and im an idiot and my ex said there were too many issues and she couldnt fight 4 it on her own and that its 4 the best right now? and now she is kinda saying hi to my mum dude girls are strange creatures,,that ive learned thru all this
Sadbutrelieved Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 Try to ignore. NC is the best way, really.
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