Angel1111 Posted February 19, 2010 Posted February 19, 2010 The gym is a good idea. Also, try to get out in nature and get some fresh air (as long as it's not sub-temps there). It helps a lot. So, how are things going? Are you doing ok? Is he trying to contact you? What happened with the stuff you needed to get from him?
Author EYECANDY000 Posted February 19, 2010 Author Posted February 19, 2010 The gym is a good idea. Also, try to get out in nature and get some fresh air (as long as it's not sub-temps there). It helps a lot. So, how are things going? Are you doing ok? Is he trying to contact you? What happened with the stuff you needed to get from him? Things are going good. I was almost tempted to text him last night and ask 'what did I do to deserve this?' But I decided not to. I'm sure it wouldn't have made a difference, and I'm sure I wouldn't have gotten the answers I wanted. As far as his things, he hasn't asked for his key to his house back. He hasn't asked for the monies I owe him. and he still has my wii game . Which I just said forget it. Every since Valentines day and I told him that I needed time and space he hasn't contacted me.
betamanlet Posted February 19, 2010 Posted February 19, 2010 For real, he sounds like kind of a jerk. Hence why he has a girlfriend?
Kamille Posted February 19, 2010 Posted February 19, 2010 Hence why he has a girlfriend? Hence why he no longer has one.
Hot Carl Posted February 20, 2010 Posted February 20, 2010 I think a random kiss from a charming stranger would make everything better.
Author EYECANDY000 Posted February 20, 2010 Author Posted February 20, 2010 I think a random kiss from a charming stranger would make everything better. You think so?
New_Life08 Posted February 20, 2010 Posted February 20, 2010 Oh jeez you two stop flirting...you're makin me sick!! LOL!!
Author EYECANDY000 Posted February 20, 2010 Author Posted February 20, 2010 After 12 days of not initiating contact. I finally let let my emotions get the best of me and I broke down and texted him. I asked him what I did that was so wrong to deserve such pain. He responded and said ' I didn't do anything wrong' I said I was sorry for texting him, and he don't have to worry about future messages, and I know its nothing he can say to ease the pain. And good luck with everything. After a few minutes, I wanted to ask a few questions like if I didn't do anything wrong why did he end it? I texted him and asked if he was busy and if I could call but no response yet. I don't know why I allowed myself to hurt all over again
Hot Carl Posted February 20, 2010 Posted February 20, 2010 It's not too late to change your mind. Turn off your phone and go hang out with a friend or something. Nothing good will result from getting in touch with him.
Kamille Posted February 20, 2010 Posted February 20, 2010 After 12 days of not initiating contact. I finally let let my emotions get the best of me and I broke down and texted him. I asked him what I did that was so wrong to deserve such pain. He responded and said ' I didn't do anything wrong' I said I was sorry for texting him, and he don't have to worry about future messages, and I know its nothing he can say to ease the pain. And good luck with everything. After a few minutes, I wanted to ask a few questions like if I didn't do anything wrong why did he end it? I texted him and asked if he was busy and if I could call but no response yet. I don't know why I allowed myself to hurt all over again Eyecandy, I hope you're feeling better. Right now you're in pain and, as any healthy human being would do, you're trying to figure out what you did to cause the pain so you can avoid doing the same thing again. Only - your ex is right... You didn't do anything. It isn't you. All it is is that you two weren't right for each other. Stop asking yourself what you did wrong. I would delay any analysis of your relationship until a time when you feel better. Try to just let it go. But if you must torture yourself with reminiscing, switch the question up... don't ask yourself what you did wrong, ask yourself what made it so this didn't work. Focus not on yourself, but on the relationship and its red flags. the bottom line is this though: There is nothing wrong with you. This guy just isn't your guy.
txsilkysmoothe Posted February 21, 2010 Posted February 21, 2010 I don't know why I allowed myself to hurt all over again That's the thing about making contact. The pain is renewed and you seldom get the response you want. Then you realize you just gave away all your power and control. One day at a time! You have alot of support!
Author EYECANDY000 Posted February 21, 2010 Author Posted February 21, 2010 That's the thing about making contact. The pain is renewed and you seldom get the response you want. Then you realize you just gave away all your power and control. One day at a time! You have alot of support! thanks guys.. we spoke and he stated that he still loves me and that he just wants to take it slow and be friends. I told him that right now I cant be friends, maybe in the future. Stated that everything just moved so fast when we met. which is true. he asked if we could hang out before he goes out of town (tuesday) . and I said I wasnt sure.
tigereyes1428 Posted February 21, 2010 Posted February 21, 2010 i would not hang with him - how hurt were you by him not answering your message asking if you could call him - then times it by a zillion and thats how you will feel after you hang out with him and the day is over - protect your heart honey - nothing good can come of delaying the inevitable here which is that its over and you need to build new life without him in it xx
Author EYECANDY000 Posted February 21, 2010 Author Posted February 21, 2010 i would not hang with him - how hurt were you by him not answering your message asking if you could call him - then times it by a zillion and thats how you will feel after you hang out with him and the day is over - protect your heart honey - nothing good can come of delaying the inevitable here which is that its over and you need to build new life without him in it xx I really do hate that I opened that wound back up and texted and called him. He called me today to see how I was doing. And at first we had a civil conversation. But I kept bringing up how he's hurt me, and how it still hurts. We got into an argument about me not buying his xmas gift that I promised I would get for him once the merchant had it in stock. He stated that I promised it and I'm going against my word. Told him I didn't feel the need to buy it for him considering the fact that we aren't together. I tried to stop the convo and tell him clearly this isn't what I want. I don't want us to be on bad terms. And he said well ill continue to give you your space and we ended the convo... What the hell was I thinking... I do need to be back at my peacful place when I felt free. And it didn't hurt. I started it back up again.
Hot Carl Posted February 21, 2010 Posted February 21, 2010 Wow. He's guilt-tripping you about a Christmas gift when you're in pain and discussing your relationship? Was it your life's dream to end up with a wanker? If not, then any anguish you feel over this guy shouldn't last long. There are better guys out there, EC. My impression is that you could find one, if you want one.
Angel1111 Posted February 21, 2010 Posted February 21, 2010 It seems that you have forgotten the whole reason behind the discussion that led to the break-up. He only broke up with you as a pre-emptive measure because he knew you were most likely going to break up with him. And you should have. I understand that you feel connected to him still, but the truth is he was somewhat verbally abusive to you and you seem to have completely forgotten that, and have decided to focus on the break up. He made you feel bad about who you were, he made you feel dumb for little things that were completely non-issues. But he's done a great job on you because he constantly has you second-guessing yourself. The way he was talking to you before the break up tells me that this would've gotten way worse down the road. I might've said this before but I'm going to say it again - this is the point where women get themselves in so much trouble with men. This is the deciding point where they lose the thread. He's a rotteon bf, he will be a rotten husband. He isn't the guy for you. He doesn't respect you - he only acts like he does when things are going a certain way, like when you're broken up. And the fact that he mentioned the xmas gift just shows his level of immaturity and how he likes to play you. I wish you would wake up and step out of this self-pity mode. If you don't, you're just going to continue to go downhill. And if the two of you get back together, the same old stuff will start all over again. Whenever there are bad signs in a relationship, they don't get better. If you continue to ignore those signs, you will end up in a bad relationship. It's your call.
Author EYECANDY000 Posted March 11, 2010 Author Posted March 11, 2010 I guess I was wrong to think it would be different this time around. Well everyone who states that they miss their ex and wants to get back with them, let me be the first to say thats its a bad isea. It wILL NOT WORK OUT! yes, you miss that person, but the same problems resurface.. Well as many of you know, my ex contacted me a little less than a week ago and stated that he missed me and wants to see me. I agreed to see him and we had a really nice time. The last few days we have spent every day with each other, until I started asking him where did I stand with him? He stated that he wants to take things slow and see where things go. I asked him what are we seeing? he already knows how I am and vice versa. Well we had a very emotional conversation about "us".. Well as we continued to talk I asked questions about his "ex" girlfriend and if she is still in the picture. Well he stated that they are just friends.. Which I find hard to belive. and I cant comprehend how they are just friends when she has done a lot of underhanded s&it to him. but yet he still forgives? anyways I told him if he wasnts to continue to talk to me and see where things go then he needs to cut all ties with her. I said its either her or me.? He thought about it.. and it seemed like he couldnt make a decision and so I made one for him. and he hung up.. well I guess I get what I deserve.. i know I shouldnt have responded back but I was foolish enough to think that it would be different. The positive thing is this time it doesnt hurt. I feel like i made a mistake and I need to move on.. I realize that they are exes for a reason.
craw Posted March 11, 2010 Posted March 11, 2010 as third party observer, who has barely read this thread, I would just like to say you deserve way better and someone who actually respects you. doesn't make you feel "stupid". **** this guy, find your friends n forget - go solo travelling whatever. don't feel bad - you didn't do anything, don't feel guilty and stop blaming yourself.
ADF Posted March 11, 2010 Posted March 11, 2010 After reading your account of the gas station fiasco, I think one of two things is likely: 1) Your BF is the biggest jerk in the world. I've met people like him before, people who get set off at the slightest thing. They are in a near-constant state of frustrated agitation. Being around them for more than a short time is utterly exhausting. 2) Your Bf wants out of the relationship for whatever reason, but doesn;t want to tell you so directly. So, he is engineering stupid fights, which he will use to rationalize a breakup in the near future. Good luck.
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