jlr Posted February 3, 2010 Posted February 3, 2010 So my ex and I haven't spoken now since the last day of December 2009. We were trying to be "friends" then after several tries. Basically her relationship with the guy she met mid 2009 wasn't working - she said he liked her more than she liked him, he was racist and offensive, he borrowed like 700$ and never paid it back, etc. So she popped back up last October with a bunch of sorrys and gave me false hope (again). After several times of going on a rollercoaster after our breakup, I thought this time was different. She talked of getting her life together, etc. So I, like a sucker, went for it. Then when I built her back up again and she was strong enough to dispose of me and go back to the new bf she was supposedly "not that into," she did. She used me for emotional support and self-esteem, and when I needed her or told her how I felt, she didn't give a ****. She was the same old person, just with a better way of masking it. Anyways, I've been doing good since. Not having her around is forcing me to move past it. I've gone back to school, I moved in with friends, etc. Then, today, on a rare whim, I decided to see if she changed her email password. We always knew each others passwords, we trusted each other. I'm aware our days are through, and thought, hmm, wonder if she changed it. Anyways, she didn't. And in her inbox were tons of emails from real estate agents about the houses her and her new bf were looking at. I even looked at one and she signed it with her name and his. They started dating in May 2009, and then from like October 09 to December, she didn't even want to be with him. Their relationship wasnt "Very epic." Now, she's not just moving in with him, they're buying a house together? Really? We were together for 5 years, lived in an apartment for like 3 or so. She knows this dude like 7 months - with months of not being into it between - and she's going to ****ing buy a house with him? My heart physically hurt when I read it. And now, I'm just thinking, wow, she's really messed up. One minute she doesn't even like a dude, the next she wants to make a huge decision like buy a house with him? It makes sense though, I guess. Our relationship wasn't bad. It had it's problems. But she was always up and down, back and forth. She breaks up with me, and then 2 months later she's back and stringing me along for 6 months - having sex, telling me she loves me. Then she meets a dude, drops me from her life, and then a few months later resurfaces for moral support. Then, bam, drops me again. Now, she's buying a house with a dude she barely knows or even really likes. She just can't ever sit down with herself and sort out why she's like that. She admits it's an issue but doesn't want to every try to change it. I feel bad for the dude who's being suckered into her ****. Two months ago his GF was telling her exBF how much she doesn't like him. Really classy. And now, you're gonna be stuck with it. I cried when I saw the house thing. It hurt. I would've wanted to buy a house with her. But who's to say she wouldn't have dumped me a month after signing the lease. She's unstable. And maybe I was freed from that. Even though things like this still hurt like the day we broke up, maybe it IS for a reason. Maybe I'm not meant to be with someone who's so irrational and fickle.
Author jlr Posted February 3, 2010 Author Posted February 3, 2010 and yes, I realize it's not cool to read someone's email. However, I know I'm not gonna want to do that again after seeing that.
nobmagnet Posted February 3, 2010 Posted February 3, 2010 Hey you dodged a bullet! really darling do you need such a hot and cold using character as her in your live?? Let her screw up because you know yourself she will. Detatch and have some fun and everytime you laugh/giggle smile think..........YES i am free. my ex has just had the Karma experience. have a look my freind it on coping. Move on you sound like a good man and she dont deserve you. Nobby xx
You Go Girl Posted February 3, 2010 Posted February 3, 2010 If she's unstable with just a bf and a lease, you should be very glad you're out of that situation. Just wait until real life hits--like a mortgage, kids, job layoffs, bills, and health problems. And yeah--tell her to change her password. That will stop the urge of looking again. You don't want to be a peeping tom for the next five years of what is going on in her life. It's not good for YOU.
McGrupp Posted February 3, 2010 Posted February 3, 2010 you want me to egg the house. in that case...PM me
Green Posted February 3, 2010 Posted February 3, 2010 you blame alot of your problems on other people. Tell her you have her pw and she should change it, and don't ever check again to see if she did. Nothing good can come of this. First off never stay in contact with an ex, thats my rule.
Trialbyfire Posted February 3, 2010 Posted February 3, 2010 Is it possible that he's funding the house, hence why she's willing to buy a house "with" him? Aren't you tempted to change the password on her? Just kidding..kinda'... Stay away from her email, go completely NC. She's blatantly unstable so the sooner you move on, the better for your own emotional health.
McGrupp Posted February 3, 2010 Posted February 3, 2010 you should just post her email on 4chan or on like craigslist looking for tranny hookers. either way is a win/win
Author jlr Posted February 3, 2010 Author Posted February 3, 2010 Nobby - Thanks for the really kind words You're totally right. I think I did dodge a bullet. Trialbyfire and McGrupp - Thanks for making me laugh about this. I needed that. Laughter IS the best medicine. YouGoGirl - Thanks for the words of truth. Green - I don't know why you said I blame my problems on other people. I don't. If you've ever read my other posts, I've spent alot of time blaming myself, even for the stuff that was never my fault. She deserves blame on the things I mentioned. That's just the truth. I've owned up to my faults and taken responsibility for them. I've also made steps to change my errors. My ex, she'll own up to them all, depending on the mood, but never try to change or make amends for them. And the few times she has, it's lasted a few weeks, then she takes it all back. As for the few who mentioned that I should tell her to change her password. I don't want to contact her about this. I don't want her to know I even cared. She doesn't deserve that knowledge. I don't check her email all the time or anything. It was a fluke thing really, and boy did I learn my lesson. I'm not going to read it again, that's for sure. Thanks everyone.
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