Bartlett Posted February 2, 2010 Posted February 2, 2010 So the story is, been with gf now for almost 3 years. I'm 22 and she's 24 and we met on a study abroad program in europe where I'm from. She's from America - west coast. After the study abroad program, I spent the next 2 summers for 3 months each in California and we also visited each other each Christmas. We were crazy in love - emails and texts every day as well as talking most days for a couple of hours a day - it was amazing! She decided to move to Europe last year - had some trouble getting visa etc but she eventually made it over December 2008 on a 1 year visa. Anyway, it didn't work out exactly as we planned - she found it really tough to get a job and that caused it hard for her to settle in, make friends etc.. We got on really great although we were practically living out of each other pockets - I really thought she was the one. Anyway, because of employment she wasn't able to get her visa renewed and she had to head home in November. Now I'm stuck in Europe for another 2 years finishing a Masters so I can't go over there until that's finished. So we kept up the communication since but it hasn't really been the same - we talked 3 weeks ago and she doesn't think she wants to do this anymore - she said we gave it our best shot and it just wasn't meant to be. the distance is too much she says and the fact that we have another 2 years to go makes it too hard - we're only 22 and 24 and she doesn't want any regrets about this stage in her live but she still loves me and maybe in 2 years, anything can happen. I know to many people it might make sense but I'm heartbroken and I don't know what to do - I really thought she was the one and we would always figure things out. Now, it seems like she just doesn't want it as much anymore. I haven't been able to do anything since apart from think about her - we have talked a couple of times in the past week or so but it's killing me that we mightn't have a future together. I spent the last few years thinking about all the things we were going to do together - travel etc but now it seems like it's all over.. AHHHHHHHHHHHH
nrmommie Posted February 3, 2010 Posted February 3, 2010 i am so sorry, i can't imagine how painful this must be for you. i am sure all you want to do is see her and hold her and make it right. you guys are young, and you have a lot of changing that is going to happen in your life. you will not be the same person you are 5 years from now. it could be that in two years things will be different. or it could be that she has changed enough that she needs more than what she is able to get from the relationship as it is. or maybe she is just so very frustrated by how things have come about. i hope you can give her the space she needs. i know it is cliche, but truly if she is meant to be the one for you, she will be. i think you may find some peace if you hold onto that thought. if she is not meant to be the one, then be happy that you got to have what you had, and know that it will only be something that made your life better in the long run....
Author Bartlett Posted February 3, 2010 Author Posted February 3, 2010 Thanks for the response - it seems she's just fed up with the way things have turned out and doesn't think doing long distance for another 2 years is worth it when we worked so hard to be together and it didn't work out and we've no definite future plan in place now. Basically she said we need some time to be single and a little space and what better time to do that that when we're seperated by a country and ocean : ( I was willing to give it a go but I guess both of us need to be really committed to it. I really want to keep in touch with her so we don't drift apart and we can maybe work things out. But talking to her once a week or whatever is just making it tougher and it's like all I spend doing - waiting for the weekly chat to come around. People I've talked with have different opinions - some say let her go, cut contact and completely move on but others say just stay in touch and see what happens. I really want to be with her again - especially witht the way it ended it just feels like so unfinished... I just hope things work out!
Recommended Posts