Author canadaman111 Posted February 7, 2010 Author Posted February 7, 2010 Well the date went great!! All that could have been expected and more. She is great woman and I can't wait to see her again!!!
Author canadaman111 Posted February 7, 2010 Author Posted February 7, 2010 Well we went out for dinner. It was really nice and really good. Then we went for a walk around the waterfront. Really starting to hit it off now, and I finally got the nerve to reach out and hold her hand. Then we went to see Dear John. It was pretty good, we held hands and cuddled through out. On the way home I told her the worst part of the whole night was that it had to end. She then invited me to her house. We went there and before long i was spending the night. We shared a bed, but being the gentleman I am nothing serious happened. I told her I wanted to wait until it was the right time. What an amazing girl. probably the best night of my life. Later on today she is coming over and we are going to introduce each others kids to each other. Can't wait to meet her girls!!
soulm8 Posted February 7, 2010 Posted February 7, 2010 Wow! You two are moving super fast... why introduce the kids so early? I really hope you don't regret this.
meerkat stew Posted February 8, 2010 Posted February 8, 2010 It's understandable that you want to move fast with this one, sounds like there may be compatibility there. However, introducing the kids at this point is a very risky and generally bad idea. This is extremely premature, and why expose your kids to prospective step siblings before more water is under the bridge with you two? Why add the possibility of mishaps such as incompatibility between the kids? Congratulations on a good date, but please consider holding off for a couple of months on mixing the kids together until you actually have a relationship that is on a firm foundation.
soulm8 Posted February 8, 2010 Posted February 8, 2010 Is your divorce even final yet? I checked out your other thread and yikes... you were still in love and hoping for a new start with your wife not much more than a month ago. I'm not judging you - I just really see a train wreck in the making... hope I'm wrong.
Author canadaman111 Posted February 9, 2010 Author Posted February 9, 2010 We didn't introduce to the kids to us as a couple. There was a thing a a local gym for kids to play at. She wanted to bring her kids to it. We just introduced the kids to each other, and never said anything about us. There was no affection of any sort between us. The kids won't know anything besides we are friends. We don't plan on introducing them to the other part for a while yet.
Author canadaman111 Posted February 9, 2010 Author Posted February 9, 2010 Things have actually got a little more complicated. Sunday night after the kids were over she gave me a kiss and left. Then comes monday morning. We have been exchanging nice little texts while we are working. So i sent her one saying I have had so much fun with her and can't wait to see her again. A few hours later i get this "thanks...You are very sweet too...I think I need some time" Caught me off guard. It is not necessarily a bad thing for her to take sometime and be sure this is what she wants. I would just like to know what is up. I tried calling her last night but there was no answer, and she didn't return my call. I guess all I can do is give her sometime and see how she feels. I really have no idea what is up. She has told me she is a little scared of actually committing to someone. She is always afraid of getting hurt so I am kind of leaning to that. I really care for her and respect her and will give her a little time.
single Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 Hope i am wrong but it sounds like bad news pal, sounds like she is bailing because she is probably not over her ex or just not into you. You need to do the same forget this one and look after yourself until you are ready and over your ex. I read through your thread it all sounds too fast and i would never introduce my kids so quick next time leave it until after a few months. sorry but there will be more dates with others or maybe she will phone back but if someone was bailing like that after 2 dates i would forget them as she must have issues, has other guys she is playing or she is just not into me. Actually for me online dating is a waste of time you are better meeting people first in the real world, bars still work me well sometimes
soulm8 Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 I would just like to know what is up. I tried calling her last night but there was no answer, and she didn't return my call. I guess all I can do is give her sometime and see how she feels. She has told me she is a little scared of actually committing to someone. She is always afraid of getting hurt so I am kind of leaning to that. I really care for her and respect her and will give her a little time. I'm sorry to hear this, being the hopeless romantic that I am! But... this was way too fast. Don't call or text again until you hear from her.
Ariadne Posted February 9, 2010 Posted February 9, 2010 "thanks...You are very sweet too...I think I need some time"...I tried calling her last night but there was no answer, and she didn't return my call. She probably figured you were a step away from proposing to her after a couple of dates. I´d have gone running away from you. You sound desperate and she barely knows you. Good luck though.
sid3 Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 Too much, Too fast. Slow way down, in fact stop. She knows your interested, maybe to the point of being too interested. I suggest letting her contact you as the other poster suggested. Your ONLY hope from this point on is to keep things lite, just have fun, no serious talk, future plans, none of that. Cut the contact in half, or even more, it sounds like she got way overwhelmed with the quick replies etc. It's better to have some down time where she gets to think about you and wonder a little. I hope all is not lost, as it sounds you really like this women. I think how you act from this point forward is critical to the potential of a relationship developing. I'd wish you luck, but luck has little to do with it. Maybe think about how to avoid coming off too eager, needy desperate whatever, so you don't push her away in the future. Hope it works out for you.
Author canadaman111 Posted February 10, 2010 Author Posted February 10, 2010 Well, still haven't heard from her. I am willing to wait, but i do think she should at least tell me what is up. Whether i came on to strong, or if she is scared of committment or whatever. i just wish i knew. I am considering contacting her in a few days. Knowing full well that if I contact her it could very well be the end of things right there. I just have to decide if I am willing to take that risk.
yeex Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 I would concentrate on contacting other potential dates and not pining for this one. I guarantee you contacting her again will make it worse. You cannot talk somebody into wanting to be with you. Also if you just went on one date and she does not contact you again, that means she is not interested. Also it is quite common to not get an explanation of why they are not interested these days. Yeah the relationship went way too fast and she is realizing it. If she wants to spend time with you again, she will definitely contact you. If you try to contact her again, you will look really desperate.
skydiveaddict Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 (edited) I hope not, but the "I need some time" speech is almost always a one way ride into the "friendzone" Edited February 10, 2010 by skydiveaddict
sid3 Posted February 12, 2010 Posted February 12, 2010 You may have said something that ticked her off, IDK. It's odd that she went from contact every day to nothing.
Author canadaman111 Posted February 13, 2010 Author Posted February 13, 2010 Well i have a update. Yesterday i finally heard from her. She was avoiding me trying to figure things out. She said unfortunatly she wasn't ready for long term committment yet. We talked about it and realize everything we talked about before we met sounded great but put a lot of pressure on both of us. We just need to get to know each other at this point. She was worried i would be mad and that is why it took her so long. We have agreed to slow down big time but still want to see each other. The single biggest issue was the kids meeting last sunday. She said it went really well and everything else, but she left feeling like she was married again, which she said wasn't all bad. Just how we were all together with the kids playing and them we got them supper ready she just felt it was to quick. We have agreed the kids don't come back into it until we are both sure. I think this is great news. She could have easily just went on not talking to me if that was what she wanted. Since she comes back shows she really does like me. She said everything we did on the date saturday was absolutly great and loved every second of it. So now we are going to try to get together in the next week to two weeks. I can't wait.
Recommended Posts