Jump to content

dont know whats best for me to do anymore


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

my gf of three years broke up with me about four months ago....but still calls a couple times a day....and says she hopes we can work things out and still get married one day but that things arent right just yet....she hasnt been seeing anyone else...and doesnt want me to either even though she says there s nothing she can do if i decide thats whats best for me......she even comes and stays the night and we cuddle and kiss (but i wolnt have sex with her even though she wants to)...she says she feels immature still and wants to grow up and be independent for a while before we take the next big step of living together(i just bought a house...she is 22 i am 25)...everytime i tell her how scared this situation makes me she acts like me feeling like a safety net and her finding someone else is crazy and says that s not how this is going to go she is still in love with me and doesnt want to do this without me???she says whatever actions i choose she accepts but doesnt like the idea of me dating and not talking to her....i really dont know whats best here???help

Posted

Huh....with that story I wonder why would she ever bother to break up with you to begin with.

Posted

At the end of the day what do you want?

 

Do you want her at 50% or do you want her at 100%?

 

Because if you want her at 50%, keep doing what you are doing (i.e cuddling, hanging out etc...)

 

If you want her at 100% it's going to involve taking a bigger risk....

 

DROP OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH. Even for a week. Don't contact her in anyway. Explain to her that with you it's all or nothing.

 

If she comes back it will be for the right reasons. What she needs to tell you is, "I'm sorry. I made a huge mistake and I am willing to do whatever it takes to make this relationship work". Period.

 

People don't say that they want to get married to someone "one day" and then fall off the face of the earth. It just doesn't work that way.

 

Let her see what she has been missing. I know it's difficult but you cannot make yourself readily available to her. And if she doesn't contact you during that period and say what I mentioned above...she was NEVER serious to begin with. Good luck.

×
×
  • Create New...