If a woman doesn't want marriage or kids, do men automatically lose interest?

[OceanTropic]

If a woman doesn't have any interest in getting married or having kids, does a man automatically lose interest (if he himself has those interests)? Or does he continue to see where things might go, if she might change her mind?

[greatgirlfriend]

She might change her mind. In my 20's I was convinced I never wanted that. Now at 39 I do and it's too late for me.

[Explorer]

If a woman doesn't have any interest in getting married or having kids, does a man automatically lose interest (if he himself has those interests)? Or does he continue to see where things might go, if she might change her mind?

 

Depends on how much he's in to her

[Vintage79]

If a woman doesn't have any interest in getting married or having kids, does a man automatically lose interest (if he himself has those interests)? Or does he continue to see where things might go, if she might change her mind?

 

It depends on what the guy really wants - if he truly wants a family, then he liekly would lose interest, if he doesn't want one, the it's obviously fine. There's also a difference between short term and long term - in the short term, he'll have a good time, sex, fun, new friend, etc...no downside, the longer term vision may change his perception. I at least want the woman to be open to a famly. If not, I'll usually take advantage of the near term sitation and then move on. This is likely a gender neutral situation.

[meerkat stew]

It depends on how urgent his desire for children is compared to his desire to have sex with the woman in question.

[EnigmaXOXO]

It depends on the individual person. Personally, I’ve never found it to be an obstacle for myself when I was dating or even now with my current partner. Then again, I’ve only found myself mutually attracted to other similarly minded people. But I’ve never had anyone not want to be with me, or had a relationship end because of it.

 

However, some people want what they want and you really can’t blame them for not settling. Similarly, I don’t think you should begrudgingly take on something you don’t really have it in your heart to do just to make someone else happy at your own expense. There’s always the chance that you could meet that someone who completely changes your mind. . . or vice versa. But I recommend never entering or remaining too long in a relationship with someone solely on the hope that one day they might come around and change their mind.

[alphamale]

If a woman doesn't have any interest in getting married or having kids, does a man automatically lose interest (if he himself has those interests)? Or does he continue to see where things might go, if she might change her mind?

he would probably lose interest over time i suppose but then again its usually the women that want marriage and kids.

[You'reasian]

If a woman doesn't have any interest in getting married or having kids, does a man automatically lose interest (if he himself has those interests)? Or does he continue to see where things might go, if she might change her mind?

 

Assuming he wants to be married and have kids, he may grow to love and respect the woman, but eventually his relationship goals and his current situation would become out of sync.

 

There would have to be a pause point where the two would decide which direction they would go...

Edited January 31, 2010 by You'reasian

[stillafool]

If a woman doesn't have any interest in getting married or having kids, does a man automatically lose interest (if he himself has those interests)? Or does he continue to see where things might go, if she might change her mind?

 

 

It really seems strange to ask this considering most men complain that women are always trying to tie them down. You would think guys would come out of the woodwork for such a situation with a woman, wouldn't you?

[OceanTropic]

It really seems strange to ask this considering most men complain that women are always trying to tie them down. You would think guys would come out of the woodwork for such a situation with a woman, wouldn't you?

 

Eventually, ever man wants to settle down.

[sagetalk]

I would lose interest, but that's me.

 

BTW EnigmaXOXO, your avatar should have the girls heart in the same place as the guys. Just for the sake of accuracy .

[OceanTropic]

BTW EnigmaXOXO, your avatar should have the girls heart in the same place as the guys. Just for the sake of accuracy .

 

lol we would need to remove ANY hearts in order to be accurate

[stillafool]

Eventually, ever man wants to settle down.

 

 

Well why do they pretend they don't? You even see threads here about men asking why do women want to get married so bad as if they are running for their lives to get away from it. They say there is nothing in it for men and it is a situation that only benefits women, blah, blah, blah. Why do they act like this. Men want women to settle them down and get upset when they won't.

[greatgirlfriend]

Well why do they pretend they don't? You even see threads here about men asking why do women want to get married so bad as if they are running for their lives to get away from it. They say there is nothing in it for men and it is a situation that only benefits women, blah, blah, blah. Why do they act like this. Men want women to settle them down and get upset when they won't.

 

I'd like to know myself. The guy I am dating keeps insisting he never wants to get married but I don't completely believe him.

[OceanTropic]

Well the problem is not so much that the woman says she doesn't want marriage or kids; the problem is that pretty much any woman not yet married who has not yet had kids yet says she doesn't want to get married nor have kids is an extremely confused person. I'm assuming the lady in question is say in her early to mid 20's.

 

At best, she should be saying: "I don't want marriage or kids for right now. I'll leave the option open for the future and if the right guy comes along."

 

Anyone, man or woman, having never been married and never had kids, again assuming they are relatively young, absolutely has to have a screw loose absolutely rule out ever having marriage or kids in the future.

 

 

Not true. I know some adults (mid to late 40's) who still don't want to settle down or have kids. Normal people without any "loose screws". I will admit, very few, but they do exist, and they are mentally stable lol

[callingyouuu]

Well why do they pretend they don't? You even see threads here about men asking why do women want to get married so bad as if they are running for their lives to get away from it. They say there is nothing in it for men and it is a situation that only benefits women, blah, blah, blah. Why do they act like this. Men want women to settle them down and get upset when they won't.

 

Half true. They want to settle down at some point, but just not....yet. Guys typically don't have a game plan for when that point will be, in large part because that sets a time limit on how long they can be free from the confines of changing diapers. Understandably, that makes their family-oriented female counterparts pretty worried about the future. Rather than hear all of the nagging about when they'll be "ready", it's easier for guys just to say that they'll never settle down, which is how they feel at the time, but after a while they'll be ready.

 

We just don't like to think about that right now.

[boogieboy]

If a woman doesn't have any interest in getting married or having kids, does a man automatically lose interest?

 

Please show me the way to this Unicorn woman.....

[stillafool]

Half true. They want to settle down at some point, but just not....yet. Guys typically don't have a game plan for when that point will be, in large part because that sets a time limit on how long they can be free from the confines of changing diapers. Understandably, that makes their family-oriented female counterparts pretty worried about the future. Rather than hear all of the nagging about when they'll be "ready", it's easier for guys just to say that they'll never settle down, which is how they feel at the time, but after a while they'll be ready.

 

We just don't like to think about that right now.

 

But, men get upset when women don't want to think or talk about marriage and kids It's like they want it to be on the woman's mind but not on theirs.

[stillafool]

Note, I am not saying that a young woman MUST have marriage and children as a goal in life. I am saying anyone that young who RULES IT OUT is not thinking rationally. Most likely they have been sold a bill of goods by feminists or something who tell them, falsely, that women don't need marriage and children to have a fulfilling life.

 

Well, I decided in my early 20's that I didn't want kids and am in my late 40's and never once regretted my decision. I have friends who feel the same way and all of us are married. I decided I didn't want kids when I watched my mom work so hard for us and my dad. I just didn't want that type of life.

 

The problem is that biologically it starts becoming more difficult to have and raise healthy children after about age 35 for women, and after age 40...you are really taking some chances. Also, the older one is, the more tiring it is to raise small children. It's a lot easier for a 25 year old to chase a toddler around the house all day than it is for a 42 year old.

 

I agree with you on this. If a person (man or woman) decides to have children they should do it while they are young.

[Woggle]

Deep down most men want marriage and a family but the chances of marrying a woman and it actually working out are very very slim so men decide not to take a losing gamble. In cultures where family is more valued men are not so scared of commitment because they know it actually means something from the woman's end as well.

[phineas]

Deep down most men want marriage and a family but the chances of marrying a woman and it actually working out are very very slim so men decide not to take a losing gamble. In cultures where family is more valued men are not so scared of commitment because they know it actually means something from the woman's end as well.

 

I did.

Now after 2 kids i'm divorcing.

She was cheating.

At 38 i'm done having kids.

Any woman interested in me who wants kids is wasting her time with me.

 

I am not opposed to remarrying, but for me the point of marriage was to start a family.

 

I already have my kids.

If the next woman I meet has kids & doesn't want more I see no reason for marriage anytime soon.

[stillafool]

Deep down most men want marriage and a family but the chances of marrying a woman and it actually working out are very very slim so men decide not to take a losing gamble. In cultures where family is more valued men are not so scared of commitment because they know it actually means something from the woman's end as well.

 

Then why are men complaining when a woman isn't interested in marriage and kids? They should be happy.

[stillafool]

I am not opposed to remarrying, but for me the point of marriage was to start a family.

 

 

The why remarry if your only point to marrying was for kids in the first place?