Littlemonster Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 Hi, ive been seeing a girl recently for about 7 weeks, it all started off a bit dodgy because she had just finished a relationship so it was all very slow. I really like her and have never found someone that i feel completely comfortable being around and she feels the same, we get on so well when its just the two of us. Its awkward at the moment though because when we go out she worries about her ex's friends seeing us together so i get no attention atall. She says to me she has a lot of issues like depression anxiety and abandonment issues. She goes through phazes where shes very full on with what she says, for example: "i really do think you the one" or "i cant wait for our future together" And then a week later she'll be very blunt and not interested and show me no affection atall, she says its because she doesn't want to open up too much because shes been hurt so many times in the past that shes scared it will happen again. Also, i know this ones a bit petty but when she texts me she only puts one kiss at the end, but everyone else gets 3 and sometimes a heart. Ive mentioned this to her and she says there just friends and kisses dont matter, but they do a bit. I'm on the edge of giving up, but whenever i show signs of it she gets really upset and worries about loosing me. I really want to be with her but dont know how to deal with all this. She says to me not to worry myself and that she wants to be with me its just going to take time. And i need to give her space. But i read on the internet about abandonment issues and i seem to relate to it more than her, she just dont seem interested sometimes. Help?
cognac Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 Hi, ive been seeing a girl recently for about 7 weeks, it all started off a bit dodgy because she had just finished a relationship so it was all very slow. I really like her and have never found someone that i feel completely comfortable being around and she feels the same, we get on so well when its just the two of us. Its awkward at the moment though because when we go out she worries about her ex's friends seeing us together so i get no attention atall. She says to me she has a lot of issues like depression anxiety and abandonment issues. She goes through phazes where shes very full on with what she says, for example: "i really do think you the one" or "i cant wait for our future together" And then a week later she'll be very blunt and not interested and show me no affection atall, she says its because she doesn't want to open up too much because shes been hurt so many times in the past that shes scared it will happen again. Also, i know this ones a bit petty but when she texts me she only puts one kiss at the end, but everyone else gets 3 and sometimes a heart. Ive mentioned this to her and she says there just friends and kisses dont matter, but they do a bit. I'm on the edge of giving up, but whenever i show signs of it she gets really upset and worries about loosing me. I really want to be with her but dont know how to deal with all this. She says to me not to worry myself and that she wants to be with me its just going to take time. And i need to give her space. But i read on the internet about abandonment issues and i seem to relate to it more than her, she just dont seem interested sometimes. Help? Sounds like me. Only change 7 weeks to 7 months. By the way, I haven't gotten anywhere with her yet and I still get the "more time" garbage but she is gradually pushing me away. Don't waste your time, is my advice.
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