aroll32 Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 From my simple experience I seem to agree. Haven't had one girl that doesn't eventually hurt me in some way or another or just stop making contact. Your thoughts?
dyzfunctioned Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 False. I've felt the same way before but it's just an excuse. I know plenty of nice guys who have gotten the girl, myself included. Perhaps what you meant to say is nice-guys-who-are-overly-shy-and-lack-basic-social-skills finish last, in which case you're probably right. Have some confidence in yourself, get out there and meet some people. It's hard to get a girl when you portray yourself in a manner that leaves friendship as the only considerable option. Not saying that you are one of these guys, but I've been one of these guys and I've seen/experienced enough "nice guys" getting the girl to know that it is false, and that if there's a reason a nice guy isn't getting the girl, it's not because he's nice but rather due to lack of confidence, social skills, etc. etc.
Brady_to_Moss Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 This is true. Nice guys ALWAYS finish last...thats why i ignore and treat women poorly and you know what? They like that more than me being nice to them...its amazing you can treat someone like ****..and they like you...yet you show any intrest or anything..you are screwed.
h_man Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 "Being a bad boy" is silly and stupid. It's all about confidence and self respect. If girl isn't interested NEXT her. If nice guy will change his attitude he will seem like an idiot. Be yourself. NEVER change your yourself because of a girl. If you go after bad guy mentality then you will finish last and nothing good comes in relationship. Too much wanna be bad boys out there. Don't be another one. Worst thing that one can do is change his personality against his actual will. Your love will come. Don't search it desperately. It will find you. Just be yourself.
Tony T Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 If I see one more nice guy thread in this forum I will blow up into a thousand pieces and my parts will rain down upon this entire earth and there will be nuclear winter for two million years!!!
Awesome Username Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 If I see one more nice guy thread in this forum I will blow up into a thousand pieces and my parts will rain down upon this entire earth and there will be nuclear winter for two million years!!! Take a tip from Tony. Girls like badass guys who cause nuclear winters.
sagetalk Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 What a jerk does well is keep her guessing and provide loads of excitement and drama. You are obviously not creating any of these. The more attractive the women you go after, the more options she has. You have to stand out. Women love to feel emotion (any kind of emotion). If you come off flat, you will lose to jerks. Why? because they create negative emotions , which trumps the no emotions that you are generating. Get out there and get your gf thinking about you all the time and saying and thinking, "what is he thinking?", "does he like me?", "is there any girl better than me that's after him?", "does he think I'm attractive?", "would he marry me?", "I wonder what he's doing now?", "why hasn't he texted/called back yet?", "if I wear this will he like it?", "I hope he had a great time on our date, but I'm not sure", "why did he say that?", "I could never be just friends with him", "he confuses me", "I don't understand him", "he does things I don't like, but I can't stop thinking about him". The list could go on forever. My guess is your girlfried's were not saying any of those quotes above. Be mysterious, be weird, be aggressive, be bold, be puzzling, but most importantly follow these two rules: 1. do not ever get stuck as a non sexual/romantic friend after you have gone on a date 2. make her feel emotions by the boat loads (try to keep them positive ). If you do both those things you will never have to complain about being a nice guy again. You'll be too busy telling women to get lost you're already in a relationship with a hottie .
randall Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 The 'nice guys' on forums seem to be the kind who are nice to girls even when the girl is clearly not interested in them. These nice guys are always there for the girl, buying her things, doing things for her, listening to her complaints ,etc. They then get all angry when the girl doesn't want to go out with them. They don't realise that pushing your niceness onto someone who isn't interested is more annoying than nice (for the other person).
hoping2heal Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 From my simple experience I seem to agree. Haven't had one girl that doesn't eventually hurt me in some way or another or just stop making contact. Your thoughts? I think this is a very common excuse made by people who are not insightful enough to look at the real reason why a woman doesn't want to date them.
alphamale Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 the majority of men have no idea how to deal with women...its all about knowing how to make them respond emotionally
meerkat stew Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 Nice guys definitely do finish last. We wait until she finishes to finish ourselves.
sagetalk Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 the majority of men have no idea how to deal with women...its all about knowing how to make them respond emotionally Once their emotions kick into full gear, and you know what you're doing, they are toast.
TheLoneSock Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 From my simple experience I seem to agree. Haven't had one girl that doesn't eventually hurt me in some way or another or just stop making contact. Your thoughts? You have to hurt them before they can hurt you dude. It's all part of the game, duh! Just kidding. But yes they do tend to finish last more often than first. It's not always the case but if you're in your 20's and around girls that aren't looking to settle down, you're likely to get stung a few times if you're not careful. Just have as much respect and self esteem for yourself as humanly possible, and people will recognize that. People will treat you how you want to be treated, you just have to make them.
threebyfate Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 If I see one more nice guy thread in this forum I will blow up into a thousand pieces and my parts will rain down upon this entire earth and there will be nuclear winter for two million years!!! Add in the nice girls or nice people threads, and I couldn't agree with you more!!
Hot Carl Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 I'll have to give this some thought. I thought it was important to be nice to people in life. Particularly women.
hoping2heal Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 (edited) I'll have to give this some thought. I thought it was important to be nice to people in life. Particularly women. It IS. I can think of many "nice guys" in my time who wanted a shot- both genuinely nice people, and doormat type nice guys. I was never interested but NOT because they were nice. I LIKED that part about the trully nice guys (doormats aren't actually being kind, just have no self esteem so you can't compare). Sometimes we just couldn't relate to eachother in the way I need or we just didn't click, our sense of humor were too opposite to "get" eachother, our life experiences made us so different it was hard to understand where the other came from, different ideals and values. It was never ever because they were nice and kind and respectful of me. EVER. Someone told a bad joke once about treating a hot girl like crap and you will get her to like you..that was HIGH SCHOOL. In the REAL WORLD it doesn't work like that and women who trully do seek unhealthy relationships suffer from mental illness. SO, I said it once I will say it again; being nice has nothing to do with it. It's just an excuse (and a poorly thought, lame one at that) for men to complain instead of accepting why the girl REALLY wasn't interested. Edited January 31, 2010 by hoping2heal
sagetalk Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 1. Someone told a bad joke once about treating a hot girl like crap and you will get her to like you..that was HIGH SCHOOL. In the REAL WORLD it doesn't work like that and women who trully do seek unhealthy relationships suffer from mental illness. 2. being nice has nothing to do with it. It's just an excuse (and a poorly thought, lame one at that) for men to complain instead of accepting why the girl REALLY wasn't interested. 1. As much as I'd like to agree with you, it does have truth to it. With many girls, the worse you treat them the hotter/desirable you are to them. It's a fact. Do I want to date those girls, no. But there are lots of them and they are usually very physically attractive. 2. I must disagree again. I'm not bitter, nor am I unreasonable, but when facts stare you in the face you must be weary of them. Look at all the posts from girls on this forum. Take note of the ones where the girl is asking how she can hold onto the guy. I have not seen a single post where the girl is posting about how she can keep "nice guy" x. They always describe the guy as: cheating, rude, lies, selfish, bad attitude. However, when they ask the question how can they get rid of a guy, it's much different in the way the guy is described: "He's really nice everyone, but I don't want to have sex with him anymore", "He's a great guy, really", "best boyfriend I've ever had", "sweetest guy in the world", "love to cuddle with him", "sweetheart, love him to death", "don't want to hurt his feeling cause he's a great guy". I wish I were making this up. Go look it up for yourself.
Lizzie60 Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 I can't stand a 'too nice guy'... I wipe my feet on his back... They are usually spineless... insecure.. clingy... lack self-esteem.. greasy and full of zits..
BettyBoop Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 Usually, the guys who says "nice guys finish last" are creepy weirdos with extreme emotional needs and insecurity issues judging from my experience...
hoping2heal Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 (edited) 1. As much as I'd like to agree with you, it does have truth to it. With many girls, the worse you treat them the hotter/desirable you are to them. It's a fact. Do I want to date those girls, no. But there are lots of them and they are usually very physically attractive. 2. I must disagree again. I'm not bitter, nor am I unreasonable, but when facts stare you in the face you must be weary of them. Look at all the posts from girls on this forum. Take note of the ones where the girl is asking how she can hold onto the guy. I have not seen a single post where the girl is posting about how she can keep "nice guy" x. They always describe the guy as: cheating, rude, lies, selfish, bad attitude. However, when they ask the question how can they get rid of a guy, it's much different in the way the guy is described: "He's really nice everyone, but I don't want to have sex with him anymore", "He's a great guy, really", "best boyfriend I've ever had", "sweetest guy in the world", "love to cuddle with him", "sweetheart, love him to death", "don't want to hurt his feeling cause he's a great guy". I wish I were making this up. Go look it up for yourself. Yes, I KNOW there are girls out there like that. I said- the ones who ARE like that are mentally ill. I wasn't trying to be funny or making a joke I was serious. Just because they are "hot" "smokin'" or "very physically attractive" doesn't make it any less so that they have some mental illness going on where they cannot exist outside of anything but an unhealthy relationship. What many people define as "drama" are usually very mentally unstable and unhealthy people who grew up with a lot of turbulance and never healed from it. EDIT: I will further clarify that when I state mentally ill; I am referring to any state in which a person is not mentally or emotionally healthy. As a friend pointed out that doesn't necesarily mean "mentally ill" so okay- correction they are either mentally ill OR they have serious issues to be resolved- abuse issues- daddy issues- mommy issues- you get the point. Capeche? Edited January 31, 2010 by hoping2heal
Itzo Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 Yes, I KNOW there are girls out there like that. I said- the ones who ARE like that are mentally ill. I wasn't trying to be funny or making a joke I was serious. Just because they are "hot" "smokin'" or "very physically attractive" doesn't make it any less so that they have some mental illness going on where they cannot exist outside of anything but an unhealthy relationship. What many people define as "drama" are usually very mentally unstable and unhealthy people who grew up with a lot of turbulance and never healed from it. Every person have their OWN understandings ... So I will ask you this .. How healthy person would react upon this situation? Everyone in life have their own issues from the childhood, and when people experience some set back, they begin to build a WALLs to their personalities as protective mechanisms that eventually prevent them from getting the relationship they want. When you say, they are mentally ill, it is a little bit exaggeration ... don't you think? So regadring what I said, what do you understand my "healthy person"?
OceanTropic Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 Women equally get hurt by guys, and being "nice" has nothing to do with it.
hoping2heal Posted January 31, 2010 Posted January 31, 2010 Every person have their OWN understandings ... So I will ask you this .. How healthy person would react upon this situation? Everyone in life have their own issues from the childhood, and when people experience some set back, they begin to build a WALLs to their personalities as protective mechanisms that eventually prevent them from getting the relationship they want. When you say, they are mentally ill, it is a little bit exaggeration ... don't you think? So regadring what I said, what do you understand my "healthy person"? Not sure if you did or didn't see my edit where I corrected myself and said the person may not be "mentally ill" but they did have serious issues to be resolved. does that further answer your question?
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