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How do I stop?

broncosfrk83

By broncosfrk83
in Coping

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broncosfrk83 Established Member

broncosfrk83

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I cant stop thinking about her. I realize that our break up is the best for me because now i can go find someone who will give me the happiness she did but with out all of her problems. But still shes all i dream about. I think i only want her back because I just want someone. Yes i love her still and would love for none of this to happened and i hate things will never be the same between us again but it is what it is. I cant get over the fact that shes out partying right now while im at home in pain. I gotta get out and hang with friends but I fell so hard for her that i neglected my friends and spent all of my time on her, was the wrong thing to do. I realize it gets better with time but ive always been someone who hung onto things to tightly. She is not mine, never will be, and she doesnt want to be. Its just im truly not confident that i wont find someone else and that when i do they want even compare to her. I have been hanging out with family A LOT lately but even when im with them and im trying to distract myself she is still the only thing on my mind. Its been a month now and i know im not ready for a relationship yet but since me and my ex have felt "weird" and distant for like 6 months now, i feel ready to date again and i get happiness from making others happy. But it seems all my confidence is gone and I want to get out and meet people but its hard for me. Im extremely shy and dont see myself just going up to a girl i think is cute and start talking to her. Idk what to say or anything, ive always been that way. Any advice would help. Will me going out on dates help? I just feel crapy cause i wasted a lot of i love you's and alot of kisses on my ex when she says we have felt like "friends" to her and our spark was gone. That truly cuts deep i was giving myself to someone who i thought was giving themselves back but really werent.

 

ANother thing to add is that i blocked her on facebooka and so did some of my family. The last was my step sister and after she did i got a text from my ex say" hey did you say anything to your sister about me? Because she removed me from facebook and i just wanted to kno if i should expect this from everyone else you kno?"

 

Why does she care? She dumped me and now is acting like a slut that parties all the time. Just dont get why she reall thought she had to text me that. I never responded to it and im not going to.

Edited by broncosfrk83
Ilovecake Established Member

Ilovecake

Posted
Posted

I was in the same boat with the friend thing. For a long time after my breakup I was afraid to contact anyone because I either didn't stay in touch with them or they were mutual friends to me and my ex. I figures that my ex was hanging out with all our mutual friends just because he was the more social one and they would not want to talk to me.

 

After a while I got so sick of sitting at home depressed that I decided to just pick up the phone. I could not believe how happy my old friends were to hear from me. Because I stepped out of my comfort zone and took a a chance not only have I reconnected with some great people but I also made some amazing new friends.

 

As far as the mutual friends, some of them just hang out with my ex some are just hanging out with me, some talk to both of us but are really respectful not to bring up the ex to me.

 

I guess the moral of my story is PICK UP THE PHONE, YOU'LL BE GLAD YOU DID. :)

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