pdq Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 I discovered that a woman who is attracted to a jerk is repulsive to me. I'm not angry, I'm not even hurt. I'm repulsed. Is that normal? What does that say about me? THX
skydiveaddict Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 all women are attracted to "jerks" it's whole alpha vs beta thing.
DiscoChick Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 I'm not attractive jerks. That is a complete turn off.
DiscoChick Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 I'm not attractive jerks. That is a complete turn off. Attracted to***. I'm fighting vertigo ATM
Awesome Username Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 I don't know where you all get off thinking that women prefer jerks to decent people. I wouldn't give a guy who didn't treat me well the time of day.
skydiveaddict Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 I discovered that a woman who is attracted to a jerk is repulsive to me. I'm not angry, I'm not even hurt. I'm repulsed. Is that normal? What does that say about me? THX Yes it's normal. Women go after an "aggressive" guy. It's not their fault it's just a built in instinct. they want a guy who will "protect" them
Author pdq Posted January 30, 2010 Author Posted January 30, 2010 Let me clarify; rather, than feeling angry, hurt or rejected. I actually find the woman repulsive. So my question, is that repulsive feeling normal? Has anyone else ever felt it? It seems to me that this woman who has settled for someone who is a jerk, is clearly not good enough for me. In a way, she is allowing herself to be devalued (assuming she is aware of this) and that turns me off. Does that make sense?
BobSacamento Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 Women like to think they can change a man. They give them ultimatums, and it's hilarious. They like the projects, they feel like if they can change them then they have power.
DiscoChick Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 You actually like the girl and you're jealous that the jerk got her and you didn't. At least it sounds that way, what reason do you have to be "repulsed" by the girl? That's your jealous feelings talking. He's probably not really a jerk, and I'm sure she's not repulsive. :lmao: I was thinking the exact same thing!
BobSacamento Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 You actually like the girl and you're jealous that the jerk got her and you didn't. At least it sounds that way, what reason do you have to be "repulsed" by the girl? That's your jealous feelings talking. He's probably not really a jerk, and I'm sure she's not repulsive. You are right. It really is a terrible way to look at it. You can't judge a woman by the man she dates. Perhaps he's the lesser of the evils that's ever approached her.
hoping2heal Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 I discovered that a woman who is attracted to a jerk is repulsive to me. I'm not angry, I'm not even hurt. I'm repulsed. Is that normal? What does that say about me? THX It says your smart and not attracted to women who have developmental problems
hoping2heal Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 Let me clarify; rather, than feeling angry, hurt or rejected. I actually find the woman repulsive. So my question, is that repulsive feeling normal? Has anyone else ever felt it? It seems to me that this woman who has settled for someone who is a jerk, is clearly not good enough for me. In a way, she is allowing herself to be devalued (assuming she is aware of this) and that turns me off. Does that make sense? Yep, perfect sense. Another poster said you can't judge a woman by the man she dates..I say that's bullcrap. Maybe some jerk off IS the lesser of other evils but if he's really a p.o.s and she is settling for that she is still at a point in her life where not all her crayon's are in a box either. Maybe she will learn and grow one day into a wise woman that commands respect...but she is obviously not at that point YET nor is there any promise she may ever be. Anyone who really doesn't mind crappy treatment and being discarded as an afterthought by a man does not yet have their **** together and is destined to be a hailstorm of drama and bullcrap- I don't blame you for being repulsed.
BobSacamento Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 Yep, perfect sense. Another poster said you can't judge a woman by the man she dates..I say that's bullcrap. Maybe some jerk off IS the lesser of other evils but if he's really a p.o.s and she is settling for that she is still at a point in her life where not all her crayon's are in a box either. Maybe she will learn and grow one day into a wise woman that commands respect...but she is obviously not at that point YET nor is there any promise she may ever be. Anyone who really doesn't mind crappy treatment and being discarded as an afterthought by a man does not yet have their **** together and is destined to be a hailstorm of drama and bullcrap- I don't blame you for being repulsed. It's basically judging a book by it's cover. You are judging a woman by the person she is dating. Judging her based on that is shallow. I suggest he should actually get to know her and have a conversation with her.
threebyfate Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 I see nothing wrong with being repulsed by anyone or anything, during the initial attraction phase or the first few dates.
BG1985 Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 It's basically judging a book by it's cover. You are judging a woman by the person she is dating. Judging her based on that is shallow. I suggest he should actually get to know her and have a conversation with her. Actually sounds like the OP is the jerk with his condescending attitude. I'm sure the women who fall for these "jerks" don't think that these guys are jerks. Are these jerks as judgmental about women as you are? This is directed toward the OP, not Sacamento.
SoulSearch_CO Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 Yes it's normal. Women go after an "aggressive" guy. It's not their fault it's just a built in instinct. they want a guy who will "protect" them A guy can be ASSERTIVE and PROTECTIVE without being an aggressive *******. Case in point: guy I'm dating. I don't date *******s.
BG1985 Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 Look, jerks are fun to be around. I would know because I'm friends with a few jerks. Do really begrudge women who hang around guys because they are fun to hang around?
callingyouuu Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 It's basically judging a book by it's cover. You are judging a woman by the person she is dating. Judging her based on that is shallow. I suggest he should actually get to know her and have a conversation with her. Well, it's similar to not being attracted to a woman because she chooses to spend all of her money on alcohol and parties when there are still bills to be paid at home. Sure, we could get to know the woman better, but her preference for a certain kind of lifestyle will still be the same. Our choices show who we are far more than anything else. Everything we do reflects upon who we are. If you date low-quality men, it reflects upon your expectations for yourself. You just need to decide if those type of people are worth your time. In the OP's case, those women are bottom of the barrel. Next.
hoping2heal Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 It's basically judging a book by it's cover. You are judging a woman by the person she is dating. Judging her based on that is shallow. I suggest he should actually get to know her and have a conversation with her. You learn a lot from a woman by who she dates. You can learn about her judgement, her self esteem, her self respect, her maturity and where she is at in life and what she wants. You can learn all of that right off the bat. Why not save yourself the trouble?
counterman Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 With respect to the girls I date, I probably would not know their history (of guys they have dated) before I get into a relationship with them. However, if I have seen the type of guys they date, then I probably would not judge. I have noticed that some of the girls I am acquainted with do date jerks, who seemingly do treat some people in a disrespectful way. I have also noticed that being in this relationship has "changed" the jerks somewhat and they seem.. more pleasant to be around. But of course that is not 100% of the time. I know of one girl who will only date guys she deems to be of high social status. I have seen some of these guys and they are the party animals. Needless to say, I will not date girls like that. Guys do not have to be jerks to be assertive and confident. So, girls don't necessarily go for the jerks even though it might seem that way.
BobSacamento Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 You learn a lot from a woman by who she dates. You can learn about her judgement, her self esteem, her self respect, her maturity and where she is at in life and what she wants. You can learn all of that right off the bat. Why not save yourself the trouble? Because I know that I'm not perfect and to judge people based on superficiality in order to streamline the process, well that just doesn't seem right to me.
ella23 Posted January 30, 2010 Posted January 30, 2010 I don't know where you all get off thinking that women prefer jerks to decent people. I wouldn't give a guy who didn't treat me well the time of day. Yep. No sane woman wants to be treated like crap.
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