LikeABirdWhoFlew Posted January 25, 2010 Posted January 25, 2010 (edited) My ex fiance just called me on the phone and left a message because I would not answer it. She basically said that she would like to get lunch or dinner sometime soon and that she hopes everything is alright. She knows I quit my job (we worked together so she heard it through the grapevine) and am planning on volunteering in Peru for 6 months coming in Feb. or March. Well, I was the one who broke up with her, but realized I made a mistake. Less than a month later try to talk with her about it (last Oct.) but it turns out she meet someone online with in 3 weeks of us breaking up and moved in with this guy. My Ex then cheats on the new guy she moved in with, with some guy in a band. I want my ex fiance back so badly. Why is she calling me? I take it things are not going well for her. Seems she can't go 1 months without making attempts to contact me. I told her last month (final time we talked) that I loved her and wanted to be in her life. She didn't say anything so I take that as her not being interested. Any advice? ps I told her nurmerous times not to contact me anymore Thanks, D Edited January 25, 2010 by LikeABirdWhoFlew
Howitzer Posted January 25, 2010 Posted January 25, 2010 Are you able to clarify with her what her intentions are?
TheLoneSock Posted January 25, 2010 Posted January 25, 2010 but it turns out she meet someone online with in 3 weeks of us breaking up and moved in with this guy. My Ex then cheats on the new guy she moved in with, with some guy in a band. I want my ex fiance back so badly. To a healthy human being, these two statements would be completely contradictory. This girl isn't a catch at all.
Author LikeABirdWhoFlew Posted January 26, 2010 Author Posted January 26, 2010 I have no idea what her intentions are... I suspect she wants to know that I still love her. I will not call or contact her in any way to give her that satisfaction. She knows how to contact me if she is serious about wanting to talk about things. And yeah, I have to agree, she doesn't sound like a catch as I have previously described her. Crappy thing is I still love her and think of her often. D
Author LikeABirdWhoFlew Posted January 26, 2010 Author Posted January 26, 2010 Wow, she just text messaged me and said that she would like to sit down and talk with me before I leave for my volunteering stint in Peru. I didn't respond to her text. I don't know what she wants but I am almost sure it's not about getting back together. Maybe it is, I have no clue. But one thing I do know is that I refuse to keep making an ass of myself and giving in to her "wants" and "needs". For God sake, she moved in with her rebound. What an idiot! Sher can't be happy... Why do you think she wants to sit down and talk for? I mean it's been 5 or 6 months since the breakup. Is she scared I will find someone in Peru? Any advice or thoughts? thanks, D
Howitzer Posted January 26, 2010 Posted January 26, 2010 You know, I might sit down with her in this case. I'm not sure how resentful you are of her, or how bad the break up was. Sure, she did move in with a guy, then cheat on him. But I'm sure she was very emotionally confused at that time. I guess I would just be a little curious about what she has to say. However, it is very important that you keep clear your thoughts and wishes about her. The last thing you want is for her to hint at getting back together, and the thought of it consuming you for the six months when you're supposed to be getting away from it all.
Author LikeABirdWhoFlew Posted January 26, 2010 Author Posted January 26, 2010 However, it is very important that you keep clear your thoughts and wishes about her. The last thing you want is for her to hint at getting back together, and the thought of it consuming you for the six months when you're supposed to be getting away from it all. I honestly don't think it's worth exploring because of exactly what you said. If she hints or plays games about it, then I spend 6 months in Peru thinking about her. In fact, I think that's most likely what she wants. Me to think of her. I think she is scared I am falling out of love with her. She is very co-dependant. This was a major issue with our relationship. I've been on 7 dates or so since my ex, but no one catches my eye. When the one girl out there who does catch my eye and I am really really into her, then and only then will I allow my ex to contact me. If my ex want's to get back together, then she must state that point blank. I don't have time for the ups and downs of her crap and feelings towards me. D
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