cg27 Posted January 25, 2010 Posted January 25, 2010 (edited) I need some advice! I broke up with my girlfriend about five months ago mainly over bad communication between both of us, and other small things. (We dated for about two years) We have kept in contact a lot the first 4 months. I did express interest in getting back together. We would have dinner, go out from time to time, and even hug, and kiss sometimes. We decided we would exchange Christmas gifts, and she bought me a great gift. We both exchange gifts that surprised each other. The confusing part is that day, she told me she needed some time, and space to clear her head. I told her I agree, and to take the time you need. (This happened about a month ago) Right after she tells me this she holds my hand, and tells she loves me, and kisses me. A few minutes later, she jumps on top of me, and kissing me more. Then she wanted to go have sex. So we did for the first time since the breakup. I have given her space. I have not called her in about a month, and I sent one text message. She has still kept in a lot of contact with me. She usually calls me two sometimes three days a week. We talk for 10 or so minutes. She texts me about five days a week, we text back in for for a little while . She IM's me sometimes 10 - 20 minutes conversations, and even emails me from work sometimes. She will even text me asking me if I remember good times, and telling me she had a dream about me, and she wants to tell me about it. She tells me to let her make contact with me She has even come to see me three times too. I am confused. I love her, and would like to rekindle our relationship. I am getting a lot of mixed signals, and maybe false hope? Any Advice? Edited January 25, 2010 by cg27
Boundary Problem Posted January 25, 2010 Posted January 25, 2010 Can you give us more details about the bad communication? A break makes you miss each other. But doesn't fix the problems that broke you up in the first place. You obviously like each other. Why not isolate the communication problem and work on it?
USMCHokie Posted January 25, 2010 Posted January 25, 2010 If I had done what you are now doing with my ex when she gave me the "time and space" crap, I would have probably gone crazy... Right now, she misses the companionship, so she turns to you to get that since it's so easy. In truth, she probably is just biding her time with you until she finds someone else to replace you. When you get the "time and space" crap, you need to give them exactly that. Space means infinite space...no texts, no IM's, no phone calls, no dinners, no kissy kissy, and no sex. Time means infinite time...as in forever. Until she comes back and says that she made a mistake in breaking up with you and wants a relationship with you, there is no reason to take her calls or answer her texts. You are not in a very good situation here unless you're ok with her taking off the moment she finds a new guy. Don't be used...
Author cg27 Posted January 25, 2010 Author Posted January 25, 2010 A lot of bad communication was she would not tell me what she enjoyed doing. She was asking me to do almost every thing I enjoyed. It took a toll on her after a while. She told me she was doing this because she was afraid of losing me. Now that she has her time, and space she is going out and having fun. I think is is very good for her to do things like this.
sunrae Posted January 25, 2010 Posted January 25, 2010 I am confused. I love her, and would like to rekindle our relationship. I am getting a lot of mixed signals, and maybe false hope? Any Advice? Ok, You say you need to work on your communication with her... Have you told her how you feel? Have you told her you are confused? Communication needs start somewhere.. So why not start with these things and see how it goes?
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