fooled once Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 I saw this thread and enjoyed reading the comments. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t218539/ I also wondered if BS's are making changes, what changes have the cheating spouse done to make the marriage better? So that is my question, what changes have you, the BS, noticed that your cheating spouse have done to improve your marriage?
silktricks Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 jeez - so much that it's almost a different marriage - but then, I've made my fair share of changes, too. First and foremost, he talks to me. He tells me I'm important to him. He tells me almost everyday how much he love me and love being married to me. He tells me he appreciates me and comments on the positive parts of me (sometimes those parts can be hard to find). I used to think he really in his heart and soul wasn't all that crazy about either being married or being married to me. Now I know that isn't the truth. He told me just yesterday how he was scared that I didn't love him anymore, and that was in large part what caused our problems. I feel loved. I used to feel ==== accepted. It's totally different.
crazycatlady Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 This is harder for me to answer because we never had a dday. I didn't confront him about the A. However I will say that he's more interested in me coming out with him now, he wants me around. He's not trying to go anywhere alone - which I never minded, the OW was never close enough for that to matter. But he's wanting us to spend more time together. However right now, life circumstances are similar to where they were when the A happened. Job worries - he's the household provider and the thought he might not be able to is rather distressing for him. We will just have to wait and see. CCL
seibert253 Posted January 25, 2010 Posted January 25, 2010 We are both more honest and open about everything. No more secrets. I used to just bite my tongue and say nothing, no longer. If I get pizzed, I let her know. She's never been one to hold back so I KNOW when she's not happy. The best part; used to have sex maybe once a month, now it's a couple of times a week. Not complaining about that.
on1wheel Posted February 10, 2010 Posted February 10, 2010 She has changed everything except the one thing she can't...the past. She talks/answers questions when I need to, is a near perfect wife now a perfect mother, she makes me feel loved now; which she didn't do for years. I just wish she did it on her own; not after she was caught & going to lose half custody & be divorced. But I can't change how we got here, so I just try to be the best husband I can be & continue to make the ultimate parental sacrifice...staying in a marriage that could fall apart anytime she chooses to cheat again. To be honest, I don't think she will after she saw what it has done to me...I have to believe she's not that cruel.
Recommended Posts