poppy13 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 I had great sex with the last guy I dated. But a few months into dating I realized that he never went down on me. It wasn't a big deal because I don't particularly find it all that wonderful, but I was a little put off that he didn't even try. And yes, I DID go down on him... I casually asked him about it once and he said that I never asked him to. It made me wonder, do some guys just not like going down on a girl or does that mean he's not in to you? I'm not asking about this guy in particular, but in general. Part of me thinks it is selfish and I should dump a guy like that in the future, but at the same time the idea of the act (and maybe this is because I'm a heterosexual chick) is pretty gross to me.
boogieboy Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 I like doing all kinds of things to a girl, that isnt one of them. Cuz Im not good at it, and I can care less about getting good at it., but thats it. If I actually liked doing it, I'd go down without asking. Might be his mindset. Either that or he doesnt like your natural smell down there.
OnlyJake Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 I had great sex with the last guy I dated. But a few months into dating I realized that he never went down on me. It wasn't a big deal because I don't particularly find it all that wonderful, but I was a little put off that he didn't even try. And yes, I DID go down on him... I casually asked him about it once and he said that I never asked him to. It made me wonder, do some guys just not like going down on a girl or does that mean he's not in to you? I'm not asking about this guy in particular, but in general. Part of me thinks it is selfish and I should dump a guy like that in the future, but at the same time the idea of the act (and maybe this is because I'm a heterosexual chick) is pretty gross to me. Sounds like a guy I once dated. As soon as I brought it up with him (he said the same thing your guy did) he started going down on me. Not as often as I went down on him, he only did it once in awhile. But the fact that he obviously made a conscious effort was clearly a good thing. He also was very giving in other ways (very good with his hands). You can bet I wasn't giving him handjobs though - did that make me selfish? I think people just have their own comfort zones and skills.
Author poppy13 Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 ha okay boogie I surely hope that wasn't the case... Doesn't it seem like a double standard? I feel like it's not that weird if a guy doesn't going down on a girl, but it IS weird if she doesn't go down on him. Maybe it's a cultural thing.
paddington bear Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Just stop giving him blowjobs. He doesn't like oral sex, he shouldn't expect any for himself.
soulm8 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 I don't particularly find it all that wonderful, but I was a little put off that he didn't even try. And yes, I DID go down on him... the idea of the act (and maybe this is because I'm a heterosexual chick) is pretty gross to me. Yes, there are some guys that do not like it... but it could be that your guy was just waiting for you to give him the green light or he sensed your preference for not receiving. From what I've heard, lots of ladies don't like it. I really don't understand why you associate being heterosexual with the act being gross?? Why do you go down on him? Is that gross?
hoping2heal Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 I had great sex with the last guy I dated. But a few months into dating I realized that he never went down on me. It wasn't a big deal because I don't particularly find it all that wonderful, but I was a little put off that he didn't even try. And yes, I DID go down on him... I casually asked him about it once and he said that I never asked him to. It made me wonder, do some guys just not like going down on a girl or does that mean he's not in to you? I'm not asking about this guy in particular, but in general. Part of me thinks it is selfish and I should dump a guy like that in the future, but at the same time the idea of the act (and maybe this is because I'm a heterosexual chick) is pretty gross to me. You think it's gross that a man would perform oral sex, or having oral sex performed on you is gross because you're a "heterosexual chick"? I never knew oral sex wasn't a heterosexual enjoyable act
Author poppy13 Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 I dont know it's weird! I don't mind a guy's junk, but girl private parts gross me out a little. I'm definitely not trying to put down my own sex but that's just how I feel.
Porn_Guy Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Just stop giving him blowjobs. He doesn't like oral sex, he shouldn't expect any for himself. thats mean paddington bear
soulm8 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 I dont know it's weird! I don't mind a guy's junk, but girl private parts gross me out a little. I'm definitely not trying to put down my own sex but that's just how I feel. I used to feel the same way due to my upbringing. However... there's absolutely nothing gross about it and surprise, surprise... it feels really good if he knows what he's doing.
Author poppy13 Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 I grew up with 4 brothers so maybe that's the reason for my thinking.
soulm8 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Perhaps... I find ensuring I'm clean before the act helps me put the negative thoughts to rest.
OnlyJake Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Doesn't it seem like a double standard? I feel like it's not that weird if a guy doesn't going down on a girl, but it IS weird if she doesn't go down on him. Maybe it's a cultural thing. To be fair, cooters are kind of hidden, while penises are more like appendages. I say as long as they're both clean, who cares? Just stop giving him blowjobs. He doesn't like oral sex, he shouldn't expect any for himself. There's always this solution
stevejohnson1976 Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 Just stop giving him blowjobs. He doesn't like oral sex, he shouldn't expect any for himself. yup.. I on the other hand, LOVE it...
rina_r Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 I used to have the same problem with my b/f. So we had a talk. He said he thought most girls did not like it. I said i did. Problem was fixed.
GAchasen Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 Yes, there are some guys that do not like it... but it could be that your guy was just waiting for you to give him the green light or he sensed your preference for not receiving. From what I've heard, lots of ladies don't like it. I really don't understand why you associate being heterosexual with the act being gross?? Why do you go down on him? Is that gross? Maybe some women don't like it, because the men weren't doing it right! LOL...It is the most amazing, when it is done well:)
Stung Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 Just stop giving him blowjobs. He doesn't like oral sex, he shouldn't expect any for himself. Word. Everyone is allowed their sexual preferences and all that, but this would be a dealbreaker for me, personally. I loves me some sex and I consider it a very important part of any relationship. I've actually never run across a guy who wouldn't give oral...or even someone who thought I needed to ask. Would he expect you to have to ask every time? I would find that a real turn-off. I don't expect it every day but IMO oral should be regular and enthusiastic, for both parties. My husband loves it, and I love that.
Vintage79 Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 I don't mind doing it - but it tastes kind of gross...at least in the beginning.
OnlyJake Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 I don't mind doing it - but it tastes kind of gross...at least in the beginning. It's not as though women don't deal with "the taste" of a dick either.
Vintage79 Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 (edited) It's not as though women don't deal with "the taste" of a dick either. I'm not going to try to claim that the guy tastes good either (I have no idea - but I can't image that it tastes like a fine red wine)...I don't think those parts are designed to have an amazing flavor... I actually like doing it though - and the ladies definitely appreciate it - it's a win, win, sans the first 5 seconds. That said, yes, I think the guy is selfish if he expects oral from you, but doesn't reciprocate. If he doesn't expect it, then it's not necessarily selfish. IF he's not giving it to you - ask...as mentioned, there's a bit of a not-so-tasty barrier to entry, but then it's all good. Edited January 23, 2010 by Vintage79
Stung Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 I don't mind doing it - but it tastes kind of gross...at least in the beginning. This is a personal thing...I have never thought it tasted gross, unless there was a hygiene problem.
Vintage79 Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 To each their own - I don't think I've done that to girls with hygeine problems...at least I hope not! It's certainly bearable - I can see how some guys would probably like it, and some guys would definitely dislike it. I'd imagine it's similar with girls doing similar activities to the guy...I've had some girls who love to swallow every thing and say it tastes awesome, and some who nearly gag.
Absolutely Curtains Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 To each their own - I don't think I've done that to girls with hygeine problems...at least I hope not! It's certainly bearable - I can see how some guys would probably like it, and some guys would definitely dislike it. I'd imagine it's similar with girls doing similar activities to the guy...I've had some girls who love to swallow every thing and say it tastes awesome, and some who nearly gag. There's a lot more to put in your mouth if you're a girl doing it to a guy though...
Satisfaction Posted January 23, 2010 Posted January 23, 2010 Well I suppose if you really like it and he hates it, then it could be a problem. Maybe he is worries he doesn't know what he is doing properly? You could try talking him through it and see how it goes? In a previous life I tolerated a guy who was completely clueless but thought if he kept going for hours it was fine. In a way I'm grateful because some days I just need to think back on how crap and suddenly being single doesn't seem so bad anymore!
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