PJKino Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 A friend of mine told me the other day a few people were hanging out and another "friend" of mine asked my good friends wife trying to joke around would u rather be with either: and he said my name or another member of the group whos known as a really ugly guy She begrudgingly said if i had to pick one of them and said my name If a male freind and wife of my best freind who loves me speaks of me like this i cant be attractive.. Im glad i dont apprach women and save myself embarrasment of rejection
OpenGL Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Well I'm definately not ugly, about average at best, but here is the thing. It's better to be tall and ugly than short and good looking.
amagordos Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 How do you look like? Anyways it doesn't matter. You should feel pretty within yourself or handsome. Don't let others perceptions of you affect you that much. Like with me, i got teased a lot in school, were most people thought i was ugly. I let it get to me and in effect that led me to having frequent panic attacks. My self-esteem was in the dump. Please forget what they think. I know am glad that i didn't look like the other girls and that is why they singled me out. I have a big nose and that makes me unique. Find what makes you unique and use it as an asset.
torranceshipman Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Dude, lose the poor me attitude, it could be a lot worse. Besides, do you really think a married woman is going to pick one of you guys with glee? Having to 'choose' one of you guys is embarrassing for her, esp in front of her H, even if you were all joking around.
Author PJKino Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 Besides, do you really think a married woman is going to pick one of you guys with glee? Having to 'choose' one of you guys is embarrassing for her, esp in front of her H, even if you were all joking around. Yeah but shes a pretty upfront women who talks about guys she thinks are attractive in front of her husband
Author PJKino Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 How do you look like? Anyways it doesn't matter. You should feel pretty within yourself or handsome. Don't let others perceptions of you affect you that much. Like with me, i got teased a lot in school, were most people thought i was ugly. I let it get to me and in effect that led me to having frequent panic attacks. My self-esteem was in the dump. Please forget what they think. I know am glad that i didn't look like the other girls and that is why they singled me out. I have a big nose and that makes me unique. Find what makes you unique and use it as an asset. I hear you,just sucks to think people think eww when they think of u physically
Satisfaction Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 A friend of mine told me the other day a few people were hanging out and another "friend" of mine asked my good friends wife trying to joke around would u rather be with either: and he said my name or another member of the group whos known as a really ugly guy She begrudgingly said if i had to pick one of them and said my name If a male freind and wife of my best freind who loves me speaks of me like this i cant be attractive.. Im glad i dont apprach women and save myself embarrasment of rejection It doesn't matter if you are good looking or not. You should approach women though. Ask your trustworthy female friends for advice for the best way to go about this.
Author PJKino Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 It doesn't matter if you are good looking or not. You should approach women though. Ask your trustworthy female friends for advice for the best way to go about this. The only trusthwrothy female friends i have are my friends wives and one of em was the one who begrdugingly picked me
cognac Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Sorry to hear that OP, but if you're tall go to bed soundly knowing that "between PJ and cognac, I'd pick PJ again". I used to think I was ugly and believed that was the reason girls were not as interested as i thought they should be. But honestly, when I look in the mirror 7 out of 10 times I see a decent looking guy. I remember one time in high school i was in class and our teacher was splitting us into groups, and some girl yelled out: "WOW, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO PUT ALL THE GOOD LOOKING PEOPLE IN THAT GROUP!" that I was in LOL. In fact, I know that if I was 6 feet tall I would probably take a new woman to bed every single night when you combine my alright looks and killer personality. My tall good looking friend who gets women looking at him all the time, but has no self confidence and lower than average interest in women (prefers booze and video games) makes me think about how God only gives bread to the toothless Then agian maybe if i was in his boat, i wouldn't think twice about women since he knows that there will always be someone around when he's in the mood, rather than taking shots in the dark and praying for a miracle like a 5'7 guy whose broke. Don't act all pissy and offended man. If you're ugly, so be it. I've been put up in the "who would you rather" cruel games women like to play and GOD ONLY KNOWS the type of things the young women I've known say about me behind my back, I don't even want to know.
ella23 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Look, nobody is universally ugly or good looking. Looks are subjective. So you're not going to unattractive to every woman out there. And anyway, if looks were all that mattered, don't you think a very significant percentage of the population would be single?
theBrokenMuse Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 As someone who is ugly myself I will tell you that once I was able to give myself permission to just be me and stopped giving a damn about other people's expectations, I noticed a change in how other people treated me. When we don't value ourselves highly it shows, no matter if we realize that we are sending out that vibe or not and if we don't value ourselves highly other people are more likely to follow suit. I am not saying that you have indicated that you have that problem as I once did or anything, I am just throwing this advice out there because it's so very common among those of us who aren't considered very physically attractive by today's societal standards.
randall Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 (edited) ...and he said my name or another member of the group whos known as a really ugly guy She begrudgingly said if i had to pick one of them and said my name At least you are ahead of the other guy! I was very unattractive when I was in school and was definitely the guy people would regard as the ugly one. Of all my high school and university friends I'm the only one who is still single (not married or with a partner). If you're not the ugliest person in a group the chances are you can get a girlfriend. Groups consisting of mostly married or partnered people aren't likely to have more than one person who is an utterly hopeless case. It's not impossible, just unlikely that a group consisting of mostly couples will continue to hang out with several guys they consider ugly loners. Edited January 22, 2010 by randall
Satisfaction Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 The only trusthwrothy female friends i have are my friends wives and one of em was the one who begrdugingly picked me You need to try and make new friends then! Anyone at your job? School? Make an effort to people who seem interesting. Think of effort like spreading jam on a sandwich. Not too much not too concentrated in one person. If you try and people don't reciprocate, just stop. They could get concerned scared etc if they think you are trying to force your friendship on them. Pop into your local library and look for books on the topic. I would say use the internet but its full of people trying to con you into attending useless, expensive seminars. If you can easily spot things like that then try the forums that tend to use excessive amounts of acronyms like PUA AFC IOI most of the advice they give and their attitude to women is appalling but they do offer encouragement and support which will help alot until you can figure things out properly for yourself. Don't worry about being an alpha or beta anything. Use what you have right now. Make yourself a better, more confident version of yourself its your support network that helps you along. I don't think you should consider that woman part of it.
Author PJKino Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 You need to try and make new friends then! Anyone at your job? School? Make an effort to people who seem interesting. Think of effort like spreading jam on a sandwich. Not too much not too concentrated in one person. If you try and people don't reciprocate, just stop. They could get concerned scared etc if they think you are trying to force your friendship on them. Pop into your local library and look for books on the topic. I would say use the internet but its full of people trying to con you into attending useless, expensive seminars. If you can easily spot things like that then try the forums that tend to use excessive amounts of acronyms like PUA AFC IOI most of the advice they give and their attitude to women is appalling but they do offer encouragement and support which will help alot until you can figure things out properly for yourself. Don't worry about being an alpha or beta anything. Use what you have right now. Make yourself a better, more confident version of yourself its your support network that helps you along. I don't think you should consider that woman part of it. I hear you but to obe honest the women who begrudignly picked me didnt brign it up it was a Male friend trying to inditgate things is what i heard from my friend. SO its not like the women did it in front of me and if she doesnt think im attratcive i cant kill her for it
Author PJKino Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 . Groups consisting of mostly married or partnered people aren't likely to have more than one person who is an utterly hopeless case. It's not impossible, just unlikely that a group consisting of mostly couples will continue to hang out with several guys they consider ugly loners. Why would couples care if the single guys they hang out with are ugly or not?
HLUB Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 A friend of mine told me the other day a few people were hanging out and another "friend" of mine asked my good friends wife trying to joke around would u rather be with either: and he said my name or another member of the group whos known as a really ugly guy She begrudgingly said if i had to pick one of them and said my name If a male freind and wife of my best freind who loves me speaks of me like this i cant be attractive.. Im glad i dont apprach women and save myself embarrasment of rejection If you really feel that way then you are. Not to be offensive. But hey, not everyone in the world can be perfect and good looking. You just gotta have confidence in yourself, besides, sometimes, 9% chance of the time, beauty isn't what everyone is after.
RedDevil66 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 to me ugly is on the inside. If you're not attractive physically, that does not equate to ugly Now, there are many thing you can do to make yourself attractive. If you have bed teeth, get them fixed, if your hair is falling out, shave your head. Have a stylish women help pick out some cool clothes. Now having said this, one of the hottest men in Hollywood is Russell Crowe and let me tell you, he's physically NOT attractive, but he is, see what I'm saying!
Ruby Slippers Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Yeah but shes a pretty upfront women who talks about guys she thinks are attractive in front of her husband Talking about random guys and talking about your husband's friends are two different things. A woman would not even want to hint that she's attracted to any of his friends. This could explain her begrudging admission. You just need to keep looking. I have been amazed when some of my exes have revealed some of the stinging comments about their appearance they have carried around for years -- in some cases since junior high! I guess we all do. I have been with guys that I thought were totally gorgeous, and they thought they were average at best. Keep your hopes up, keep looking, and you'll find a keeper who thinks you're awesome just the way you are.
Author PJKino Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 Talking about random guys and talking about your husband's friends are two different things. A woman would not even want to hint that she's attracted to any of his friends. This could explain her begrudging admission. You just need to keep looking. I have been amazed when some of my exes have revealed some of the stinging comments about their appearance they have carried around for years -- in some cases since junior high! I guess we all do. I have been with guys that I thought were totally gorgeous, and they thought they were average at best. Keep your hopes up, keep looking, and you'll find a keeper who thinks you're awesome just the way you are. Thanks appreicate it and hear what youre saying.. But for a male friend of all people to bring it up to try to insitgate and for him to notice im ugly then a women who really cares for me to say well i guess if i had to pick one well that doesnt bode well for me
Orchid8 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 It's better to be tall and ugly than short and good looking. Sad but very true.
kimflute26 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 seriously????????? I would take the short good looking guy over the tall ugly one any day!
ella23 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 (edited) Sad but very true. are you serious? It really depends on the guy. I wouldn't make such a general statement. Edited January 22, 2010 by ella23
donnamaybe Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Put a pic up in your profile and I'll give you an honest assessment.
donnamaybe Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 seriously????????? I would take the short good looking guy over the tall ugly one any day! I DID take the short, good looking guy!
Orchid8 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 (edited) LOL.. Yah.. that was a general statement but that's just my opinion. Edited January 22, 2010 by Orchid8
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