Chitowngirl Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 So I'm 27 and have been crazy in love twice; once from age 22-23 and then again at 25-27. I've had multiple boyfriends that lasted 4 months to 1 yr but none compared to the intense emotional and physical attraction I've had for two guys I dated. How long does love like this come around? Is it every few years like my track record? Or less?
quankanne Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 I think the more pressing question you should be focused on is whether these intense relationships have staying power *if* it's your desire to have a life-partner. Because I think for most of us, the experience has been somewhat of a hodgepodge one: There are periods of intensity, and periods of dullness, and in between, a nice steady happiness-inducing state of being in that relationship. if you're looking for "intense love," I think you're setting yourself up for disappointment because it isn't realistic when you want that in a long-term relationship, and you're always going to be searching for the next "high" ..
torranceshipman Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 I'd say 3 times in my life, but they were all very different, and my partner now is definitely the only one of the 3 that would work as a lifetime partner. I guess the first of the 3 was genuine love and passion but we were very young and grew apart (started as a high school teen romance). The 2nd was a classic intense, passionate rollercoaster (great, but not maintainable, and to be honest, I kinda grew out of a lot of stuff in that R as I grew older, and became attracted to different qualities in a guy). I guess what I wanted in my 20s was too different to what I want now. This third one is just great - I feel real passion for the guy, and also real security from him, and respect that goes both ways. We have very similar interests, and are truly in love, but don't need a rollercoaster of intensity to maintain it. I guess a big difference is also that he is the only guy that I would want to start a family with as he would be a great role model to kids/make a great father (I feel ancient saying this, lol!) whereas the others would have been wrong for that role, but I guess I didn't care about that at the time, as I wasn't anywhere close to having a family, etc. So I guess maybe the big R's only come around when you're next ready for it...?
TaraMaiden Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 Twice. One when I was much younger, (in my teens) and the one I'm in now. there's been a gap of around 35 years, but it's been worth the in-between time to get to this......
sumdude Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 Just once, when I met my ex-wife in '99.. ahhhh it was a very good year. Well there were more good years than bad i suppose. Sure hurt when she ended it.
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