BreakingUpIsCrap Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 This is yet another text book reason why NC must never be broken. After 22 days days of amazing NC that led to two communication attempts by the dumper, I have crashed and burned spectacularly. The success of the NC freed up my mind to be able to take an objective outsider's view of our failed 18 month relationship. That coupled with meeting up with some mutual friends that have known my ex for awhile painted a very odd picture of said lass. So I started piecing all that together with my experiences with her and found a very scary picture of BPD. I also found out that she's a habitual liar basically told me the biggest whopper ever. Her ex (father to her kid) died many years ago. Turns out chap's very much alive and prefers to remain "dead" just to get away from her. I wonder what happened there then. Anyway, it eats away at me for days on end, the major whoppers and this BPD thing as all descriptions basically match my experience, the false accusation, the amazing highs of euphoria, the constant switching form I love yous to I hate you etc. Basically, I am more or less convinced she's BPD. I'd started off with bi polar, but suspect hers is milder than that. So anyway, I decided to (against better judgement), firstly respond to her feeble apology, by saying thanks for the message, but please observe my NC etc etc. What I got back was her typical fiery response, calling me names etc. This is when things got out of hand, I responded saying amongst other things, that I actually worked out what the underlying issue was with her, and that I wouldn't be taking notice of anything else she says. At one point I did explicitly tell her I suspected BPD. This morning I have received 20 (yep two zero) email calling me all sorts of stuff, with one telling me that she's a married woman now and that I needed to observe NC!! Please note, we've had this long break up session spanning months...since last September. The last one basically called me mad, and that I needed to check into some asylum. Now my NC is shattered and I am back to square one. Feel free to kick me
sunrae Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 Nah, No one here should kick you... Take it as a learning experiance and move on... To me this just screams "be THANKFUL, you are no longer in that relationship".... And now you truely see her true colors.. Today is a new day, another new beginning, to a wonderful life.
DustySaltus Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 This is yet another text book reason why NC must never be broken. After 22 days days of amazing NC that led to two communication attempts by the dumper, I have crashed and burned spectacularly. The success of the NC freed up my mind to be able to take an objective outsider's view of our failed 18 month relationship. That coupled with meeting up with some mutual friends that have known my ex for awhile painted a very odd picture of said lass. So I started piecing all that together with my experiences with her and found a very scary picture of BPD. I also found out that she's a habitual liar basically told me the biggest whopper ever. Her ex (father to her kid) died many years ago. Turns out chap's very much alive and prefers to remain "dead" just to get away from her. I wonder what happened there then. Anyway, it eats away at me for days on end, the major whoppers and this BPD thing as all descriptions basically match my experience, the false accusation, the amazing highs of euphoria, the constant switching form I love yous to I hate you etc. Basically, I am more or less convinced she's BPD. I'd started off with bi polar, but suspect hers is milder than that. So anyway, I decided to (against better judgement), firstly respond to her feeble apology, by saying thanks for the message, but please observe my NC etc etc. What I got back was her typical fiery response, calling me names etc. This is when things got out of hand, I responded saying amongst other things, that I actually worked out what the underlying issue was with her, and that I wouldn't be taking notice of anything else she says. At one point I did explicitly tell her I suspected BPD. This morning I have received 20 (yep two zero) email calling me all sorts of stuff, with one telling me that she's a married woman now and that I needed to observe NC!! Please note, we've had this long break up session spanning months...since last September. The last one basically called me mad, and that I needed to check into some asylum. Now my NC is shattered and I am back to square one. Feel free to kick me A great site for you is www.bpdfamily.com The difference between Bi-Polar and BPD is that someone who is Bi-Polar knows that there is something wrong with them and it can be easily controlled with medication. A lot of people with BPD had a traumatic experience happen to them at the onset of the disorder. Most of the time it is because of some form of abandonment. Fell free to PM me if you need any further guidance. I'm sorry you had to go through this, just stick to NC from now on.
DenverBachelor Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 This morning I have received 20 (yep two zero) email calling me all sorts of stuff, with one telling me that she's a married woman now and that I needed to observe NC!! Please note, we've had this long break up session spanning months...since last September. The last one basically called me mad, and that I needed to check into some asylum. She sounds bat**** crazy. No offence since she's your ex and all -- but she really does sound absolutely nuts. 20 e-mails? Wow. I don't know which button you pushed but it definitely set her off.
Author BreakingUpIsCrap Posted January 21, 2010 Author Posted January 21, 2010 A great site for you is www.bpdfamily.com The difference between Bi-Polar and BPD is that someone who is Bi-Polar knows that there is something wrong with them and it can be easily controlled with medication. A lot of people with BPD had a traumatic experience happen to them at the onset of the disorder. Most of the time it is because of some form of abandonment. Fell free to PM me if you need any further guidance. I'm sorry you had to go through this, just stick to NC from now on. Thanks for this. Here's a thread that surprised... http://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?PHPSESSID=8e80d44553ff0189a15fb8b84311372f&topic=110777.msg1087364#msg1087364 " Offline Posts: 236 Re: when bpds act happy « Reply #2 on: Yesterday at 06:49:17 PM » Quote from: atwittsend on Yesterday at 06:47:38 PM I think they are happy when their actions tell you they are. If they tell you how happy they are (like in their new relationship) they are just trying to convince themselves. ha thats what she did when she ran off to this new guy. "hes such a better boyfriend then you ever were!" in like 3 weeks of dating him "
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