OpenGL Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 Here is the problem with women: By definition, most women are "average" (in looks and/or personality/social status). So when choosing who they want to pursue, they get the following choices: 1. Good looking guy who is a loser in life. 2. Average looking guy who a winner in life. 3. Nobody. They of course want the good looking guy who is a winner in life, but those men don't give these women the time of day (look at MissJoness's thread for proof of that). Here is where the problem comes in. Most girls choose option 1, the rest choose option 3 until they can attract the good looking winner just or settle for option 1. Under no circumstances will they choose option 2 until they are 45 and washed up. There is absolutely no room of being average looking in a girl's mind, regardless of themselves being average. They will either pick a good looking loser or be single until they can attract the good looking winner.
OceanTropic Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 Not true. If a guy is a winner in life, and is somewhat good looking, I would pursue him. Who wants to be with an idiot who knows nothing about life? That would be embarrassing. "Yeahh he's hot but he's a dumba**." I would rather be with the average guy who can show me the world and teach me many things. "He's a great guy! Cute too."
alphamale Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 the available pool of good looking "winners" is quite small
Clep Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 I disagree. I am an above average looking winner with lots going for me. I have seen a couple of average looking guys that were winners. I saw one really good looking guy that was just full of ego and that didn't last long. I also saw one good looking loser. haha. I don't care at all having the best looking but someone who treats me well.
MarieMarie Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 I've never thought that looks mattered all that much when it comes to my choice in guys. It's more about personality and chemistry for me. Trust me, I've been on one or two dates with plenty of good-looking winners and just felt no chemistry.
MarieMarie Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 Also, OpenGL, no offense - but I think an attitude like yours can drive women away pretty quickly. You may not even be saying anything overt, but if you EXPECT women to be shallow and devious right from the get go, they can probably sense it. And back to the original topic - I think there are a lot of average looking men out there who get attention from women because they are confident, kind, and respectful. Confidence can make someone seem more attractive.
bananaboat11 Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 the available pool of good looking "winners" is quite small X x 10^-1000000000000000000000000000 edit: holy ****.. did I just do that? I'm such a dork
bananaboat11 Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 Also, OpenGL, no offense - but I think an attitude like yours can drive women away pretty quickly. You may not even be saying anything overt, but if you EXPECT women to be shallow and devious right from the get go, they can probably sense it. And back to the original topic - I think there are a lot of average looking men out there who get attention from women because they are confident, kind, and respectful. Confidence can make someone seem more attractive. A good woman worth dating can smell insecurity 50 yards away... confidence 10 yards away... arrogance 5 feet away... and money 100 yards away. ha
Woggle Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 Attitude is 90% of the game when it comes to women. If you let them know you can have a perfectly happy life without them things will fall into place. Even if these over entitled princesses who think they deserve to be treated like a queen when they have done nothing to deserve it will drive themselves nuts trying to attain the unattainable. The less you love a woman the more she loves you.
D-Jam Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 How do you explain me then? I'm 36, not 45. I not only found Ms Right, but I had several other women who wished my GF had not snagged me first. Very pretty women I might add. I'm not above average looking (my pic). I'm still a nice guy at heart, just not a doormat. My GF is two years younger than me, and lord knows she probably would have had other options for men if she had not met me. So how you explain my change of fortune I keep telling of? I don't make a massive Ferrari or BMW style paycheck. I don't have a body and face like David Beckham or Jude Law. I don't go hopping to the A-List parties and/or jet set around the globe. The problem is your logic. You think ALL women are the same because of the few you've met and dealt with. What about the obese woman who wouldn't pick #1? What about the single mom who maybe had her share of #1 in a marriage that ended in divorce and now is looking for a #2 that would respect her? You will have to accept that there are women out there as you describe. They want David Beckham or Jude Law and believe anything less is settling. So they will hook up with the bartender who can't hold a job because he's gorgeous, or they hook up with the shallow yuppie who can't seem to commit, or they push away all men and claim they are happy alone and will not settle in life...hanging with those like them pretending they are the cast of Sex and the City. I've seen them...guess what? THEY'RE STILL SINGLE. They haven't found Mr Adonis. They are slowly figuring out that they are not as "all that" as they believe. So imagine I was single and we all hit 38...and these women are suddenly checking me out. What do you think I should do? a) "Pump them and dump them" as "sweet revenge"? b) Give them a real shot in a RL? c) Walk away and seek a better class of woman? The answer is C. A just gets you laid, but you grow to hate women even more. B just gets you hurt, because you knew who this person was beforehand. C is the answer because no matter what those particular shallow women are NOT WORTH YOUR TIME. You and others want to believe you're lesser beings because they can get men left and right and they won't have you, as if "getting them" is a sign of achievement. You need to more think that there are better women out there. The librarian type who perhaps doesn't get out much at all. The church girl who looks bland at first sight, but you might suddenly think she's beautiful when you get to know her. Believe me, I was "eh" about my GF's looks when I first met her...because I was still stuck in that mentality of nice chest, angelic face, long dark hair, sexy fashion. I got out of that and gave things a shot. Now I see the women I used to pursue as just plain ugly. You and cognac and others can keep making excuses and keep blaming women. MeganDoll and MissJones and the rest can keep blaming men. The commonality you all have is that your complaints WON'T CHANGE ANYTHING. So you can hit 45 and you'll still be rejected...because of your mentality and attitude.
bananaboat11 Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 How do you explain me then? I'm 36, not 45. I not only found Ms Right, but I had several other women who wished my GF had not snagged me first. Very pretty women I might add. I'm not above average looking (my pic). I'm still a nice guy at heart, just not a doormat. My GF is two years younger than me, and lord knows she probably would have had other options for men if she had not met me. So how you explain my change of fortune I keep telling of? I don't make a massive Ferrari or BMW style paycheck. I don't have a body and face like David Beckham or Jude Law. I don't go hopping to the A-List parties and/or jet set around the globe. The problem is your logic. You think ALL women are the same because of the few you've met and dealt with. What about the obese woman who wouldn't pick #1? What about the single mom who maybe had her share of #1 in a marriage that ended in divorce and now is looking for a #2 that would respect her? You will have to accept that there are women out there as you describe. They want David Beckham or Jude Law and believe anything less is settling. So they will hook up with the bartender who can't hold a job because he's gorgeous, or they hook up with the shallow yuppie who can't seem to commit, or they push away all men and claim they are happy alone and will not settle in life...hanging with those like them pretending they are the cast of Sex and the City. I've seen them...guess what? THEY'RE STILL SINGLE. They haven't found Mr Adonis. They are slowly figuring out that they are not as "all that" as they believe. So imagine I was single and we all hit 38...and these women are suddenly checking me out. What do you think I should do? a) "Pump them and dump them" as "sweet revenge"? b) Give them a real shot in a RL? c) Walk away and seek a better class of woman? The answer is C. A just gets you laid, but you grow to hate women even more. B just gets you hurt, because you knew who this person was beforehand. C is the answer because no matter what those particular shallow women are NOT WORTH YOUR TIME. You and others want to believe you're lesser beings because they can get men left and right and they won't have you, as if "getting them" is a sign of achievement. You need to more think that there are better women out there. The librarian type who perhaps doesn't get out much at all. The church girl who looks bland at first sight, but you might suddenly think she's beautiful when you get to know her. Believe me, I was "eh" about my GF's looks when I first met her...because I was still stuck in that mentality of nice chest, angelic face, long dark hair, sexy fashion. I got out of that and gave things a shot. Now I see the women I used to pursue as just plain ugly. You and cognac and others can keep making excuses and keep blaming women. MeganDoll and MissJones and the rest can keep blaming men. The commonality you all have is that your complaints WON'T CHANGE ANYTHING. So you can hit 45 and you'll still be rejected...because of your mentality and attitude. If you're ever around the University of Massachusetts Amherst shoot me a message. I'm so buying you a drink for this post b/c it is SO true in every respect. Well spoken man.
Crazy Magnet Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 How do you explain me then? I'm 36, not 45. I not only found Ms Right, but I had several other women who wished my GF had not snagged me first. Very pretty women I might add. I'm not above average looking (my pic). I'm still a nice guy at heart, just not a doormat. My GF is two years younger than me, and lord knows she probably would have had other options for men if she had not met me. So how you explain my change of fortune I keep telling of? I don't make a massive Ferrari or BMW style paycheck. I don't have a body and face like David Beckham or Jude Law. I don't go hopping to the A-List parties and/or jet set around the globe. The problem is your logic. You think ALL women are the same because of the few you've met and dealt with. What about the obese woman who wouldn't pick #1? What about the single mom who maybe had her share of #1 in a marriage that ended in divorce and now is looking for a #2 that would respect her? You will have to accept that there are women out there as you describe. They want David Beckham or Jude Law and believe anything less is settling. So they will hook up with the bartender who can't hold a job because he's gorgeous, or they hook up with the shallow yuppie who can't seem to commit, or they push away all men and claim they are happy alone and will not settle in life...hanging with those like them pretending they are the cast of Sex and the City. I've seen them...guess what? THEY'RE STILL SINGLE. They haven't found Mr Adonis. They are slowly figuring out that they are not as "all that" as they believe. So imagine I was single and we all hit 38...and these women are suddenly checking me out. What do you think I should do? a) "Pump them and dump them" as "sweet revenge"? b) Give them a real shot in a RL? c) Walk away and seek a better class of woman? The answer is C. A just gets you laid, but you grow to hate women even more. B just gets you hurt, because you knew who this person was beforehand. C is the answer because no matter what those particular shallow women are NOT WORTH YOUR TIME. You and others want to believe you're lesser beings because they can get men left and right and they won't have you, as if "getting them" is a sign of achievement. You need to more think that there are better women out there. The librarian type who perhaps doesn't get out much at all. The church girl who looks bland at first sight, but you might suddenly think she's beautiful when you get to know her. Believe me, I was "eh" about my GF's looks when I first met her...because I was still stuck in that mentality of nice chest, angelic face, long dark hair, sexy fashion. I got out of that and gave things a shot. Now I see the women I used to pursue as just plain ugly. You and cognac and others can keep making excuses and keep blaming women. MeganDoll and MissJones and the rest can keep blaming men. The commonality you all have is that your complaints WON'T CHANGE ANYTHING. So you can hit 45 and you'll still be rejected...because of your mentality and attitude. Well said! Not to mention, very true. While there are in fact some women who only want some super stud muffin rich guy, I have never believed that was the majority. I'm sure most guys want some nympho model type too, but that's not reality either. Why some people on the board think the opposite sex is going to somehow change to meet their needs is beyond me. If people don't want to date a stereotype, then stop pursuing the stereotype. How hard can that possibly be? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. If a man doesn't think I'm the hottest thing since slice bread, I'm not going to date him. I'm sure women pick up on the fact that man of these complaining men consider the girl to be "average" and not "hot".
meerkat stew Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 OP's post is a good simplification of dating realities for men, and D-Jam's reply is the course of action required to deal with those realities. The resentment for men comes from the fact that average women can continue to have an active and fulfilling social and sexual life while they pursue what they want, while average men have much more trouble doing so. Sure, it's not fair. Move past it or resign. Having viewed your other recent thread, I can all but guarantee you that if you made the same time investment in meeting new women that you are contemplating making in WoW, the same hours, that you will have more dating options than you can handle.
temple Posted January 20, 2010 Posted January 20, 2010 OpenGL, if you consider yourself 'average looking' and stick to this rather silly maxim, why not date ugly women? Problem solved.
Author OpenGL Posted January 20, 2010 Author Posted January 20, 2010 OpenGL, if you consider yourself 'average looking' and stick to this rather silly maxim, why not date ugly women? Problem solved. The only women I consider ugly are obese women. I'd be perfectly happy dating a non-obese woman who is average/below average looking. The problem is those women only want options 1 and 3 too.
betamanlet Posted January 20, 2010 Posted January 20, 2010 The only women I consider ugly are obese women. I'd be perfectly happy dating a non-obese woman who is average/below average looking. The problem is those women only want options 1 and 3 too. You should thank your lucky stars you don't live in DC. The situation is so bad here that I constantly see well off guys, who are very in shape with over overweight/obese women. They might all not be clinically obese, but are darn close... You don't see the reverse unless the guy is millionaire rich...
alphamale Posted January 20, 2010 Posted January 20, 2010 The only women I consider ugly are obese women. I'd be perfectly happy dating a non-obese woman who is average/below average looking. The problem is those women only want options 1 and 3 too. i don't know if you've ever noticed OpenGL but the vast majority of couples are matched up equally in looks, background and socio-economic aspects.
Author OpenGL Posted January 20, 2010 Author Posted January 20, 2010 i don't know if you've ever noticed OpenGL but the vast majority of couples are matched up equally in looks, background and socio-economic aspects. I'm not obese (10% body fat), college educated, in a professional job making good money. Are you saying I am likely to end up with someone similar?
alphamale Posted January 20, 2010 Posted January 20, 2010 I'm not obese (10% body fat), college educated, in a professional job making good money. Are you saying I am likely to end up with someone similar? most likely
temple Posted January 20, 2010 Posted January 20, 2010 I'm not obese (10% body fat), college educated, in a professional job making good money. Are you saying I am likely to end up with someone similar? I don't see any good reason why you shouldn't. I think the problem here though, lies in your disbelief.
Author OpenGL Posted January 20, 2010 Author Posted January 20, 2010 I don't see any good reason why you shouldn't. I think the problem here though, lies in your disbelief. You're funny.
Author OpenGL Posted January 20, 2010 Author Posted January 20, 2010 You should thank your lucky stars you don't live in DC. The situation is so bad here that I constantly see well off guys, who are very in shape with over overweight/obese women. They might all not be clinically obese, but are darn close... You don't see the reverse unless the guy is millionaire rich... You see the same thing in CA.
Recommended Posts