should i send this? will this give me the dignity back?

[eternal.denied84]

ex,

 

looks like i have had enough of you..these are few last words i wanted to say to you.

 

if you will look yourself in the mirror you would find what a hypocrit you are..you broke up with me saying i made you feel insulted whereas the truth is that its you who always created the platform and provoked me enough to do so.

 

after all that when i sincerely apologized to you and said that it won't happen ever again..you never listened to me..i begged,cried and pleaded but all in vain.

 

i feel disgusted to see that even after all your lies,cheating, and insults you have given me..its me who goes back to you to work out the relation whereas you didn't even think twice to say that you never loved me and all those things we shared doesn't mean to you much and i should get a new girl..your words pinch me everyday and night. It really makes me wonder that people like you exist on the earth who are downright selfish,mean and horrible.

 

you have shown your true colors.I feel ashamed that i begged you for another chance ignoring all your bull****s..whereas any other guy on this earth should have left you alone to rot in hell.

 

well, asking you for second chance proves my sincerity and loyalty for the relationships and that proves that i am very big when compared to you..you are such a low girl i have never seen before.

 

thx

 

 

PS: I have bene on NC for 2 times broken from her side for bull**** reasons and everytime it made me go back to square one and made me feel pathetic about myself.I am again on NC from past 4 days.

[NOM]

I wouldn't do it. In my humble opinion, and I'm not criticising, your letter sounds like a plea for her to take you back....as if you're offering her all these things you describe in yourself. This might not be the case, but it comes across like that, to me at least.

 

If you want her to understand how much she hurt you, continue with NC. Your silence will be the epitome of your indifference toward her, which should open her eyes.

[RedDevil66]

Stay NC, this is the BEST way to keeping your dignity.

 

No words are the strongest

[alphamale]

dude (i assume you're a dude) - this letter reeks of desperation. please do not send it. silence and NC are your best weapons

[LovelyDaze]

All are correct...stay NC and don't send that letter. All it will do is tell her you still want to be present in her life in some form.

 

Telling her off won't help you or her. The best thing to do to prove your integrity is to stay completely silent. Silence after a breakup screams louder than any letter, phone call, or text can.

 

You know what she will think if you stay NC?

"Wow(insert your name) is not calling me...he must have a life or something."

Most exes hate this and will come out of the bushes to contact YOU later. It has happened to me several times including my last ex. Thing is, they only do it to feed you dry crumbs so they can keep you hanging..don't fall for it.

[D-Lish]

Omg, don't send that letter.

Your silence is the most effective way to keep your dignity.

 

Silence says "I don't care"... That is way more effective than sending the e-mail that clearly says you are in your own private hell missing her (which is exactly what your letter intimates).

[Zeegagge]

Don't send it.

[New Again]

No, you shouldn't send that.

 

No, it won't give you your dignity back. It will just dig you in deeper. Ignore.

[richardcruz]

Eternal,

 

Don't send the letter. Although right now it may seem that sending it will have some kind of healing property, it won't. I promise you that if you fold it up (assuming that it is in physical form) and open it a year later, you'll be happy you didn't send it. After a breakup, dignity can be restored through silence. It is the best way. Words will mean very little to her right now and depending on how cold she is, she will just go and tell her friends how you're still making a big deal out of it.

 

Here is a short story for you..

Two years ago, I had an ex gf who decided to leave me. I cried (alot) and begged in front of her. I wanted her to make the pain stop, but the more I would say to her, the more like crap she would treat me. Finally one day I decided to go to her work after months of being a floormat. It was pouring sheets of rain. I decided to get out of my car and go meet her outside her car as I knew she would be finishing her shift. We'll turns out that she got of a little early and as I was waling towards the parking lot, I see her car. She pulls up to make the stop right next to me. I wave at her. She looks at me for a couple seconds and she steps on the gas as I was grabbing for her door handle. I turned to see her taillights driving off as I stood in the rain drenched from head to toe with tears in my eyes. This is the stuff movies are made off.

Anyways, about a year and a half later, my friend and I were talking and my ex somehow comes into the conversation. He then starts to tell me how he wanted to me to know something but he couldn't tell me at the time because I was going through depression from the breakup. We'll it turns out that my friend's supervisor works at the same office that my ex worked at and remembers her talking about some guy named Cruz that she had dumped and that she was so glad to be out of the relationship. She also remembers her saying how pathetic this guy was with the crying and how she couldn't get rid of him. Obviously, that guy was me.

The point is that right now the best way to get your dignity back is to work on yourself and go NC. Your ex may not be as cold as mine was, but you're better of not taking any chances. Don't degrade yourself anymore. In the future, the thing that will hurt the most won't necessarily be as a result of what she did to you, but rather how you disrespected yourself and subjected yourself to mistreatment from another person that is your equal.

Really don't send the letter. Just work on getting back your dignity one step at a time by becoming a better person from it.

[HLP234]

Don't bother with that letter. Your words seem like you want her to feel like crap for what she did. And I know you are hurting and you want her to realize how bad you feel, but making someone else feel bad is not the way to do it.

 

You have more respect and dignity if you just ignore her and what she did. It won't bother her that you are ignoring her, but then again you can move on much better.

 

Saying stuff that tells someone how horrible they are almost always means a response coming back. I don't suppose you expect her to say "Oh you are right, I was a horrible girl I'm sorry..goodbye."

 

That is not the response you get I guarantee you. She will use your words against you and make you feel 10x worse.

[DenverBachelor]

 

well, asking you for second chance proves my sincerity and loyalty for the relationships and that proves that i am very big when compared to you..you are such a low girl i have never seen before.

 

thx

 

 

This is one of the most passive-aggressive letters I've seen written on here. On one hand, you're saying you're so noble because you "asked" for a second chance and then in the same breath you explain to her how she is miles beneath contempt.

 

If I read that letter, what I'd read is this:

 

"I'm so upset you broke it off with me and I hate you like a little kid who gets his candy taken away but I'm the good guy because I put up with you and was willing to put up with you some more. I hate you, but if you get back together with me, I'll love you again."

 

Dude, you're mad at the situation and you're applying a scorched Earth policy on her. Not only are you going to destroy any chance of her keeping fond memories of you far into the future, but you're going to help her burn off any guilt she feels with the anger you're about to push inside her.

 

Once you send that letter, she'll feel a lot better about dumping you. You're not doing the situation any good by sending it.

[LovelyDaze]

Eternal,

 

Don't send the letter. Although right now it may seem that sending it will have some kind of healing property, it won't. I promise you that if you fold it up (assuming that it is in physical form) and open it a year later, you'll be happy you didn't send it. After a breakup, dignity can be restored through silence. It is the best way. Words will mean very little to her right now and depending on how cold she is, she will just go and tell her friends how you're still making a big deal out of it.

 

Here is a short story for you..

Two years ago, I had an ex gf who decided to leave me. I cried (alot) and begged in front of her. I wanted her to make the pain stop, but the more I would say to her, the more like crap she would treat me. Finally one day I decided to go to her work after months of being a floormat. It was pouring sheets of rain. I decided to get out of my car and go meet her outside her car as I knew she would be finishing her shift. We'll turns out that she got of a little early and as I was waling towards the parking lot, I see her car. She pulls up to make the stop right next to me. I wave at her. She looks at me for a couple seconds and she steps on the gas as I was grabbing for her door handle. I turned to see her taillights driving off as I stood in the rain drenched from head to toe with tears in my eyes. This is the stuff movies are made off.

Anyways, about a year and a half later, my friend and I were talking and my ex somehow comes into the conversation. He then starts to tell me how he wanted to me to know something but he couldn't tell me at the time because I was going through depression from the breakup. We'll it turns out that my friend's supervisor works at the same office that my ex worked at and remembers her talking about some guy named Cruz that she had dumped and that she was so glad to be out of the relationship. She also remembers her saying how pathetic this guy was with the crying and how she couldn't get rid of him. Obviously, that guy was me.

The point is that right now the best way to get your dignity back is to work on yourself and go NC. Your ex may not be as cold as mine was, but you're better of not taking any chances. Don't degrade yourself anymore. In the future, the thing that will hurt the most won't necessarily be as a result of what she did to you, but rather how you disrespected yourself and subjected yourself to mistreatment from another person that is your equal.

Really don't send the letter. Just work on getting back your dignity one step at a time by becoming a better person from it.

 

This is WHY you let things go. richardcruz had the best intentions but now knows that he should have done NC from jumpstart. PLEASE don't send that letter.

 

BTW, richardcruz: I sure hope you are healing nicely, so sorry you had to go through that kind of pain from your situation.

[Chitowngirl]

Don't send it. It's written poorly and sounds very bitter. Insulting someone you love isn't the way to win someone back....I'm confused...

[dietpepsi]

dude (i assume you're a dude) - this letter reeks of desperation. please do not send it. silence and NC are your best weapons

 

 

This, she will just think you are trying to get a reaction out of her. Take her out of her power position in your life by just going straight NC.

[OndaChin]

Don't send the message.

 

This is one of those times in your life your emotions are going to get a hold of you.

 

Weather the Storm of feelings and stay quiet!!

Trust me..

If you send it, you'll be reading it in the future and feel sick that you actually resigned yourself to expressing these feelings to her.

 

Be strong! Things will get better as time goes on.

[dietpepsi]

Trust me..

If you send it, you'll be reading it in the future and feel sick that you actually resigned yourself to expressing these feelings to her.

 

 

absolutely, I still feel sick about some of the things i said 5 months ago, please don't put yourself in that spot.

[ditched]

I've learned that "getting your dignity back" is an internal adjustment that needs to be made. Not external. It's very therapeutic to write letters like that. but sending it would be bad. IMO of course. good luck man!