amagordos Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Hi this is monica's cousin. I have a problem. I have been dating my boyfriend for 9 months and its starting to feel like a daily routine instead of something I like to do. The relationship has gotten boring and I don't know if i should break up with him for awhile or end it for good. Anyone ever been there and if so what would be best for me to do?
Crazy Magnet Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 That's what I was thinking. Who the heck is Monica?
Satisfaction Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 Well, I hope Monica is well and you use copy and paste more effectively next time. If that's what you feel you should tell him. But saying you are bored is not good. What would you like to be doing instead? Tell him what you would like to introduce into your routine to make it less tedious. If you can't figure out what you want to do, then you are not trying hard enough or in the right way.
Gcm Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 Depending on how often you see your partner, It's fairly normal for a relationship to feel like a "daily routine". I was with one of my recent ex girlfriends for 8 months. In that time, I saw her close to everyday. I continued to tell her that she needed to spend more time with her friends; however, she'd lost many of her friends due to her psychotic ex that made it a priority in his life to ensure that she wasn't speaking to other people. She began to feel like a second job to me. I tried to tell her that we were spending too much time together and that's when her insecurities came out to play. She accused me of cheating on her far too many times; I eventually called it quits. Are you seeing this guy everyday or close to it? Are you constantly on the phone with him when you're not around him? "Time apart makes the heart grow fonder", in most cases anyway. If you're spending less time with this guy and still feel as though you're bored in your relationship, then find out what's boring you. Do you constantly go to the same restaurants for dinner? Hang out with the same group of friends? Drink at the same pub? Try to do different things and mix it up a little. Breaking up for a while / ending it might not be exactly what you what. I'm taking it that's the case seeing as you've created a thread asking for advice. My advice is to slow things down a little, see how much you really miss this guys company. If you let him go completely and then realise it was a big mistake, there's always the chance that he won't be there when you wish to return. All the best.
SoulSearch_CO Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 Familiarity breeds contempt. Maybe you're spending too much time together. The fact that you're not necessarily UNHAPPY with him, just "bored," leads me to think that once you break up with him, you'll then "miss" him. At this point - try to spend some time doing your own things for a bit. Still seeing each other, but a lot less so. You fell for each other in the first place for who you were as individuals - not as a couple. So rediscover those hobbies and interests you may have dropped upon becoming a couple. When you get to spend time together, you'll have more to share, and therefore find more interest in each other again. But I will say this much - if you find yourself enjoying your alone time WAY more than time with your BF and you don't look forward to sharing your experiences with him, then it may be time to move on. I just don't think it's wise to break it off so quickly without further examination.
Author amagordos Posted January 20, 2010 Author Posted January 20, 2010 monica is amagordos just for those who asked and thanks ill tell my cousin what you guys said
hoping2heal Posted January 20, 2010 Posted January 20, 2010 Okay obviously I need sleep. I just laughed hysterically at "Hi this is monicas cousin"
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