chenazah Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Hello, how do people deal with coping with the good memories that are left after a relationship? the memories are the reason why i feel sad most of the time. How do people lock these away? should i think of them as a part of my life that i enjoyed and not think of them as part of my life i want back.
ginyi1111 Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Dont think of the past, period. That will setback your healing as you will be so hung up from all the wonderful happy memories and beating yourself up because you will never get them back again. Do active blocking of those memories because if you dont you will never be able to get over them. I know how it feels, seems like after I got dumped just about every direction Paris (my first holiday with my ex) was mentioned i.e. news, holiday destinations, visitors...all I did was push the thought of him away and concentrate on the matter at hand.
Ilovecake Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Date my ex, he'll leave you with practically no good memories to think of.
Odyssey Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Making a list of all the things i hate about my ex helped me a little. But there's no way of wiping them totally away, unless you get an lobotomy. Because trying to forget someone you love, is like trying to remember someone you never knew. The best way is to distract yourself from thinking about them by forcing yourself to be active and busy...and thereby... thinking about something else. Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears...for awhile.
gaudi Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 Chenazah, I suffer the same type of thing too. Even though I know the relationship we had was not perfect and we would argue and fight now and again, now that she's gone, all I remember are the good times we had. And that's what hurts. I'm not having much luck trying to block them out to be honest, I think subconciously I'm kidding myself that they are still within reach. I trust myself to get over them soon enough. One thing I am sure of is that I have the rest of my life to make a million more happy memories to look back on. Starting now.
twinklecat Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 Chenazah, I suffer the same type of thing too. Even though I know the relationship we had was not perfect and we would argue and fight now and again, now that she's gone, all I remember are the good times we had. And that's what hurts. I'm not having much luck trying to block them out to be honest, I think subconciously I'm kidding myself that they are still within reach. I trust myself to get over them soon enough. One thing I am sure of is that I have the rest of my life to make a million more happy memories to look back on. Starting now. I love this last bit, about making new memories to cherish! I spent quite a bit of time after the breakup telling myself I couldn't do this or that because it would remind me of him, of the past, and I just thought to myself, I can make new memories, I have the rest of my life to live!
Recommended Posts