SadandConfusedWA Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 So a guy that I dated 5 or so years ago found me on Facebook. We dated for about 2 months and I can't even clearly remember us breaking up. In any case, I was on the break with my ex bf then and wasn't too interested in anyone. I do think that this guy just stopped calling me at some point, but there weren't any hurt feelings on my side at all. We also made out number of times but didn't have sex (I insisted on waiting). I remember him as a very intelligent and classy guy. We had great conversatiosn but to be totally honest, he was an inch shorter than me and that kind of bothered me. Anyhow, he has now sent me a message on FB, sort of like "how have you been, what have you been up too etc." I responded briefly and he followed it up with "From your pictures, you are still as beautiful as I remember you and it doesn't look like you aged at all", he also sent me his new mobile number and told me that he would love to see me and lets catch up for coffee. Now what does this sound like to you? Does he just want to be friends? Except for the lame compliment, he came across as "just friendly". His relationship status on FB is single and there are no girls in his pictures (apart from his sister). I want to see him and I am a completly different person now. I have long since moved on from the ex and the height difference wouldn't bother me if other things were there. HOWEVER, he did kind of just stop calling when things fizzled out last time AND things did fizzle out. Both are red flags. This is assuming that he is interested beyond friends. What do you think??
Goodin Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 I think with what you know at this point it is too early to think into it much. Go meet him and see what happens! It's just coffee, not a marriage proposal. He is probably asking the same questions himself about you. He might be thinking "she's an inch taller than me, and I didn't like that...". Based on his comments, oh yes, he is still into you.
ella23 Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 It's difficult to really tell what he's thinking from those FB messages. Meet him for coffee, you'll probably get a clearer idea of what he wants.
Author SadandConfusedWA Posted January 21, 2010 Author Posted January 21, 2010 So I ended up messaging back and forth with this guy (on FB), and eventually he sent me his number and told me to give him a call. I kind of don't feel comfortable with calling guys first (seems too much like chasing). So I just responded with "I would love to talk on the phone sometime and here is my number". And left the ball in his court. He called today and asked me "out" or whatever it is for Friday night. He also said it would be nice if we had dinner rather than just coffee. I kind of get "date vibe" from him. He said that he has been too career focused to date in the last few years but is now ready...... Anyhow I will go and we will see what happens. I am kind of excited about seeing him
meerkat stew Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 He considers you as "the one that got away" and wants to see if something can reform. Why do you call his compliment to you "lame" though? That's not a good way to start off thinking of someone who re-emerges from the past unless you don't really like him.
Author SadandConfusedWA Posted January 21, 2010 Author Posted January 21, 2010 He considers you as "the one that got away" and wants to see if something can reform. Why do you call his compliment to you "lame" though? That's not a good way to start off thinking of someone who re-emerges from the past unless you don't really like him. I don't know. I guess I am unsure because things didn't work out the first time around and I can't even remember WHY. But on the up side, we never really dated long enough to truly open up and get to know each other. I am going to be cautiously optimistic
tami-chan Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 Awww..how exciting! Go and enjoy the "date"...do you plan to ask him why he stopped calling? if it were me, I wouldn't even bring that subject up...
Author SadandConfusedWA Posted January 21, 2010 Author Posted January 21, 2010 Awww..how exciting! Go and enjoy the "date"...do you plan to ask him why he stopped calling? if it were me, I wouldn't even bring that subject up... Nah, no way. It was 5 years ago and I am starting fresh now. The thing is, I was so preoccupied with my ex bf at that time, I really wasn't hurt in any way if this guy stopped calling (I am saying "if" because I can't even remember if he stopped calling or if I just didn't return one of his calls or something - I am about 70% sure that he stopped calling though). Bottom line is; I am not holding on to any grudges and hurt feelings so no point in bringing it up.
Author SadandConfusedWA Posted January 21, 2010 Author Posted January 21, 2010 Awww this guy is so nice. I work about 60 minutes from where he works and I don't own a car. I was originally going to take a train to the city (which is exactly at half way point) and just meet him there. He has now messaged me saying that he feels bad about me taking the train and wants to come and pick me up at work
Crazy Magnet Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 That is sweet! He does sound like a nice guy. I'm interested in seeing how everything turns out this time around!
ella23 Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 Awww this guy is so nice. I work about 60 minutes from where he works and I don't own a car. I was originally going to take a train to the city (which is exactly at half way point) and just meet him there. He has now messaged me saying that he feels bad about me taking the train and wants to come and pick me up at work That's really sweet of him. He sounds like a nice guy. Hope you have a good time.
meerkat stew Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 If you sneak a USB drive into his notebook while he is driving you back and forth we are coming after you!
Author SadandConfusedWA Posted January 21, 2010 Author Posted January 21, 2010 If you sneak a USB drive into his notebook while he is driving you back and forth we are coming after you! Hahah, it's WAY too early for that
Itzo Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 So a guy that I dated 5 or so years ago found me on Facebook. We dated for about 2 months and I can't even clearly remember us breaking up. In any case, I was on the break with my ex bf then and wasn't too interested in anyone. I do think that this guy just stopped calling me at some point, but there weren't any hurt feelings on my side at all. We also made out number of times but didn't have sex (I insisted on waiting). I remember him as a very intelligent and classy guy. We had great conversatiosn but to be totally honest, he was an inch shorter than me and that kind of bothered me. Anyhow, he has now sent me a message on FB, sort of like "how have you been, what have you been up too etc." I responded briefly and he followed it up with "From your pictures, you are still as beautiful as I remember you and it doesn't look like you aged at all", he also sent me his new mobile number and told me that he would love to see me and lets catch up for coffee. Now what does this sound like to you? Does he just want to be friends? Except for the lame compliment, he came across as "just friendly". His relationship status on FB is single and there are no girls in his pictures (apart from his sister). I want to see him and I am a completly different person now. I have long since moved on from the ex and the height difference wouldn't bother me if other things were there. HOWEVER, he did kind of just stop calling when things fizzled out last time AND things did fizzle out. Both are red flags. This is assuming that he is interested beyond friends. What do you think?? Yes, I think he's attracted to you. The main reason why he wants to see you is to have a sex with you. An then if things are good he might still be wanting to see you. This part bothers me when you said, " We also made out number of times but didn't have sex (I insisted on waiting)." To keep the man by your side you need to have some physical contact. The true desire to men is SEX. To women is to FEEL. So how you put those two into harmony?
phineas Posted January 21, 2010 Posted January 21, 2010 Nah, no way. It was 5 years ago and I am starting fresh now. The thing is, I was so preoccupied with my ex bf at that time, I really wasn't hurt in any way if this guy stopped calling (I am saying "if" because I can't even remember if he stopped calling or if I just didn't return one of his calls or something - I am about 70% sure that he stopped calling though). Bottom line is; I am not holding on to any grudges and hurt feelings so no point in bringing it up. If i noticed a woman I was dateing was still hung up on her ex i'd just assume she either wasn't ready or not that into me & I just would not want to deal with that.
Author SadandConfusedWA Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 Guys, I am SO anxious. He is picking me up in 15mins. I have no idea why I feel so extremly nervous, I almost felt like canceling. He called to say he is on his way now so it's too late to cancel. I am freaking out here.
OpenGL Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 I remember him as a very intelligent and classy guy. We had great conversatiosn but to be totally honest, he was an inch shorter than me and that kind of bothered me. Seriously, why do you women make it so easy to prove my point mulitple times a day, everyday? The more time I spend on here the more I hate you guys. It's like a constant reinforcement.
Satisfaction Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 what outfit did you wear? have you checked your hair? got all your stuff?
Satisfaction Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Seriously, why do you women make it so easy to prove my point mulitple times a day, everyday? The more time I spend on here the more I hate you guys. It's like a constant reinforcement. Weird, i get exactly the same feeling when reading one of your posts.
Author SadandConfusedWA Posted January 22, 2010 Author Posted January 22, 2010 I am wearing a knee length sleevless black dress (tight but not much cleavege so I don't think it looks too slutty) and flat shoes (because he is an inch shorter and I don't want to make him uncomfortable). I am very tanned and it's summer here, so I don't feel like I need much make up. I have mascara and lip gloss on and that's pretty much it. I am wearing my hair straight and down. It's blonde and about couple of inches past my shoulders. I think I look pretty hot even if I do say so myself
Satisfaction Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Oh nice sounds great! So difficult to find flats that match with a dress. Are they like slippers or those ballet type shoes?
ella23 Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Great. Good that you couldn't cancel, why would you want to cancel when he seems to be a nice guy? Have a great time.
torranceshipman Posted January 22, 2010 Posted January 22, 2010 Worst that can happen is that it doesn't work out, and then hey, you'll have dodged the short guy bullet :D
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