Kristine Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Okay I'm seeing this guy and wondering how long into a relationship before you open that sex door? We've had 3 very deep dates, he's told me about his past some of which I'm still processing, and I've told him my past, we've been very open and honest with each other. I don't know if it was to scare me away, which it hasn't totally because of his other qualities, or to just be upfront which is what he has said. I saw some on-line articles that say you're not supposed to bring up sex until the 3rd or 4th date at least. We'll it was brought up on date 2, past partners are never to be revealed, and that was brought up today (date 3). So we've basically blown it and we're still talking to each other. We have a 4th date planned for Tuesday, he inquired about Valentine's Day I was hesitant so nothing was scheduled. Anyway if we do cross that line, how much dating should occur before we do so? We've basically spent 3 days together. Our dates were quite long. We spoke for 3 hours on our first date, 2nd date was a movie, dinner, and drinks following the date, the 3rd date was bowling, lunch, and a movie, then his apartment to hang out, talk, make-out (major kissing). He got more touchy feely, and well I'm just wondering how long I should hold out. I'm really attracted to this guy, horny, the whole bit, but don't want to give the wrong impression.
GAchasen Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 I don't think it has anything to do with how many dates you have been on with him. It has to do with how you feel about him (how you feel about each other)...Are you ready for that step? It's more about both of you being comfortable and willing. Only you know when you are ready....Also, I have not been a fly on the wall, so I have no idea about the relationship you have with him.
Jasmine444 Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Hi I think you should wait as long as possible. I know how it is we all get horny but make sure you find out as much as possible about this guy before you go there. I come to learn that a person NEVER really shows their true self until after you've had sex with them. Above all else Respect yourself and he will too. Good luck:)
Author Kristine Posted January 18, 2010 Author Posted January 18, 2010 Truthfully no I'm not ready to take that step yet, I'm just wondering what the timeline is. I'm thinking if we make it to Valentine's Day maybe then I'll be ready. I know it's not going to happen in the next week. But we both feel comfortable with each other.
Pizzaman81 Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Truthfully no I'm not ready to take that step yet, I'm just wondering what the timeline is. I'm thinking if we make it to Valentine's Day maybe then I'll be ready. I know it's not going to happen in the next week. But we both feel comfortable with each other. It won't hurt to wait a bit longer. Get to know the dude first, 3 dates is not enough to figure it out. I know at the beginning everyone get all hot and bothered! But trust me, both of you would appreciate it if you wait a few months. Unless of course, both of you are not trying to seriously know each other. good luck
TaraMaiden Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 My ex-husband and I waited over 6 months before we hit the sack. My current partner of 6 years and I, waited 2 days. There is no right, there is no wrong, there is no magic special day, there is no milestone, there is no timeline. You do it when it feels right. And you'll know it will be right, because it will feel right. Six days, six weeks, six months. It doesn't matter.
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