silvisy Posted January 17, 2010 Posted January 17, 2010 I won't go into it all but I dumped him, I really did care about him but it just wasn't working out because we hadn't seen each other in 3 weeks and wern't texting and I dumped him on the expectation of wanting to get back. I kissed another guy at a club a week later. Then 2 weeks later he went off with someone else and are now going out, I know it was purely just to get me jealous, friends tell me and its obvious from FB status updates etc. We have been texting a good bit about the breakup but I've been on NC now for 10 days because he started ignoring my messages. Anyways 3 days ago he liked my FB status and Friday night we were in a club and he kept looking at me and making eye contact, his new gf was there but I heard that he cheats on her and they have broken up loads (shes ugly and hes obviously not that into her) So basicly I was going to like something on his FB page but decided against it not to break NC. So I need advice please. I know he still has feelings for me and I'm so mad about him its unbearable sometimes.
Ronni_W Posted January 17, 2010 Posted January 17, 2010 Have you considered saying that you regret breaking up, that it was a mistake on your part, and that you're sorry for hurting him? And then letting him know that you're open to reconciling if that is what he wants, as well? Of course, assuming that you've resolved the issues that seemed so insurmountable before; that you've learned that trying to manipulate others into doing what you want them to can backfire on you; that you're not planning to be resentful that he went out and started dating someone else, etc.
Author silvisy Posted January 17, 2010 Author Posted January 17, 2010 Have you considered saying that you regret breaking up, that it was a mistake on your part, and that you're sorry for hurting him? And then letting him know that you're open to reconciling if that is what he wants, as well? Of course, assuming that you've resolved the issues that seemed so insurmountable before; that you've learned that trying to manipulate others into doing what you want them to can backfire on you; that you're not planning to be resentful that he went out and started dating someone else, etc. Thats all I've been telling him over and over that I'm so sorry but I think I hurt him a lot but he never said it he was just passive agressive by starting this new relationship with someone hes obviously not that in to. I've told him that I accept it and want to be friends and he said he would love to be friends.
Ronni_W Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Ah, okay. Well...if he's not yet ready to forgive you, then he's not (and he may never be, but that's another story.) Personally, I'd tell him, "Fine. Goodbye. Good luck." And then I'd cut him off. Cold turkey. Block all ways that he has of contacting you. Unfriend him. You have as much chance of him wanting to reconcile with you if you do stay in contact with him, as if you don't. The exact same chance. But if you cut him off, you're at least also displaying some dignity, strength and self-respect. If he wants to get back with you at some point, it's going to happen even if you don't just settle on getting friend-zoned by him. Or maybe, especially if you don't do that. Best of luck.
USMCHokie Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 I won't go into it all but I dumped him, I really did care about him but it just wasn't working out because we hadn't seen each other in 3 weeks and wern't texting and I dumped him on the expectation of wanting to get back. You don't deserve him back if you make a habit of playing games or doing crap like this. If you break up with someone, you should be fully prepared to never talk to or see them again. Yes, sometimes we make mistakes and it takes time to realize that...but in this case it looks like you did it intentionally to get a reaction from him...unacceptable...I hope he doesn't look back...
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