Satisfaction Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 If you're going that far sexually, then that's not really waiting. But I suppose that's splitting hairs. And yes, I would say when you realized you wanted sexual intimacy and he didn't that was a great sign to leave then. Avoiding train wrecks are an important way to keep you sane in crazy world. Yes, actually you are right, but after a a few months of just that kind of sex, you really notice the difference between that and "full" sex. I know guys do it so they can say I did not have sex with that woman but at the time, I didn't think it was fair to leave someone because they didn't want sexual intimacy.I thought it would naturally progress to more, as far as I was concerned I was in a relationship with him and i saw him or spoke to him every day. I simplified it a bit, it was much more complex than that. I started off by saying I don't want to go too far too fast but then after a while he got pissed off and said he would never ever sleep with me, he'd make me wait years and then I would get annoyed and say well, i never wanted to sleep with him back and forth like that for a year. Such a crazy relationship. What the hell was I thinking? Anyway, now I would never go anywhere near anyone like that and if I realised that the person I was going out with was like that, I would back away pretty fast.
Bejita463 Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 I guess the question is can someone really love me but out bother about the little things? I don't know to be honest? I think you should check all these hings before you make plans to commit... The little things often do not appear to be as important as they truly are, and are often overlooked for that very reason. I'm guilty of it as well. I had an SO once that wouldn't even let me tickle her. Now how do you have a partner you know cares about physical affection and reject something so basic as that?
Satisfaction Posted January 19, 2010 Posted January 19, 2010 I had an SO once that wouldn't even let me tickle her. Now how do you have a partner you know cares about physical affection and reject something so basic as that? She wouldn't let you tickle her? hmm, strange. Maybe she has some issues in her past? If you really care about her, you cold also try the mirror technique. I don't know if anyone indulges in such acts of crazyness, I made this up myself, I think or it could have been something I saw on a film and later blocked from my mind... Anyway a SO/boyfriend/whatever was just not into touching at all. He wanted to be with me but just hated being touched(tolerated it ), so one day I ended up standing behind him in the mirror , not touching him and touching his reflection stroking his face and stuff. Also he didn't like saying good bye but would walk me to the tube so and I would put my hand on the glass and he would put his hand on the other side and walk along for a bit as the train started moving. He hated anniversaries as well, bought me a valentines day card, flowers and a teddy two weeks before the day. And slurred the word love even when in casual discussion. (omg why oh why did I put up with **** like this????) But yeah anyway he later told me how I taught him to believe in love again and he wanted to spend his life with me, and proposed to me and bought me a cheap and tacky ring etc etc. His family all hated me so it was just a no no and he went off to live in his country of origin and got married a couple of months later to some girl he had apparently been seeing for 6 months. So therefore overlapping with me. Seems like the moment he realised I would do almost anything for him but not dispose of my whole life to go live in a third world country he looked for someone else. So the moral of the story is don't be stupid, if you have to work too hard to make someone open up to you its probably not worth it, if they hurt you walk away, go for counselling if you need it and learn to give yourself what you need and don't be stupid
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