Jeff1962 Posted January 16, 2010 Posted January 16, 2010 I have this sexual fantasy that will not let go of me. I want to go down on my wife doggie style. It all started one nite when we were both in the tub. She got out before me, her back was toward me and I could see everything as she was getting out. I thought it was the most beautiful sight in the whole world, the way she is made. I would have voted that they place this on Mt. Rushmore. I've tried talking to her about this. She will have nothing to do with it at all. I've NEVER tried anything anal with her as far as penetration goes. But this fantasy of going down doggie will not let go of me. I'm not obsessed but it would be a turn on for me. Am I abnormal? I would not expect my wife to be with me in an uncomfortable situation but I feel as if I'm being cheated in some way. Are there anyother guy's out there that feel like this? Women, do you like this?
Ronni_W Posted January 16, 2010 Posted January 16, 2010 No, you're not abnormal. And, no, you're not being cheated in any way. Some women and men do like anal play...and some don't. Same as golden showers, really (or whatever else.) If your wife wanted to experiment with that but you didn't, it would be somewhat absurd for her to start thinking that you were "cheating" her out of something. I'd tell her to get the hell over it. It's a fantasy that you have, that is not going to happen with your current wife. That's all. I'm telling you the same thing I'd tell your wife about her 'golden shower' fantasy
Author Jeff1962 Posted January 17, 2010 Author Posted January 17, 2010 Ronni. You made me lol. You are right though I guess. I guess I need to get over it. It's just a fantasy and fantasies are what they are, fantasies.
Ronni_W Posted January 17, 2010 Posted January 17, 2010 Happy to make you lol, Jeff. Just to be clear, I didn't mean to get over your fantasy -- hang on to it, and enjoy it in the privacy of your own mind Rather, get over any notions that you're "being cheated in some way." It's not accurate but, if you tell yourself it often enough, you'll start to believe yourself. And it's the kind of self-defeating crap that can lead to resentment, communication break-downs and relationship issues...all over a WRONG belief that you're "being cheated in some way." If that makes sense?
Author Jeff1962 Posted January 18, 2010 Author Posted January 18, 2010 Happy to make you lol, Jeff. Just to be clear, I didn't mean to get over your fantasy -- hang on to it, and enjoy it in the privacy of your own mind Rather, get over any notions that you're "being cheated in some way." It's not accurate but, if you tell yourself it often enough, you'll start to believe yourself. And it's the kind of self-defeating crap that can lead to resentment, communication break-downs and relationship issues...all over a WRONG belief that you're "being cheated in some way." If that makes sense? Yes, it makes sense. You are right. Sometimes we place too many expactations on our loved ones. Thank you.
In_Repair Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Does she let you perform oral on her at all? I mean... the vagina and the anus do live right next door to each other. Try it out and she what kind of reaction you get. If she lets you do it, then what argument does she have for not letting you enjoy the whole fantasy of her bending over in the bath for you? Most women do enjoy a little anal play, but most women won't admit to it. Once down there... As far as the feeling cheated thing, I kind of understand what you are talking about. Especially if you feel really close to and open with the woman. I'm not into the whole anal play thing myself, but I love performing oral on a woman... and I do feel somewhat cheated if she isn't open enough or doesn't feel comfortable enough with me to straddle my face or let me eat her out from behind. It usually revolves around their own insecurities though, and it's not about you at all.
Ronni_W Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 (edited) I mean... the vagina and the anus do live right next door to each other. Try it out and she what kind of reaction you get. Oh, I wouldn't recommend that It's already been discussed and she has already made it clear that "She will have nothing to do with it at all." Having been on both sides -- having said no but been ignored, and having been told no but still gone ahead a "tried it out" anyway -- I really wouldn't recommend it. It is disrespectful to the max, and manipulative, and just plain not a smart idea. Unless you're looking to invite a whole lotta drama and unpleasantness between you and your wife/partner/lover. Yes, some people DO like it. But once your partner has already expressed their preference / dislike / distaste...it's off the table, is the only respectful thing to do. Doesn't really matter if it's a sexual thing or some type of food. THEY. DO. NOT. LIKE. IT. Edited January 18, 2010 by Ronni_W
Author Jeff1962 Posted January 18, 2010 Author Posted January 18, 2010 Yes. She loves oral. Hell. She won't even have doggie style intercourse with me anymore. We used to. She loved it. Now? Sigh. It's just in the doggie position when going down you can see everything. I think how a woman is made is quite beautiful and a turn on. Well. Whaddyado? Keep it inside I guess.
Ronni_W Posted January 18, 2010 Posted January 18, 2010 Hell. She won't even have doggie style intercourse with me anymore. We used to. She loved it. Now? Sigh. When did that change, and can she tell you what happened to cause the change? Nothing is to say that you two can't still continue to have open and respectful dialogue about it. I would back off trying to make it happen, physically. And maybe even start a convo about it way, far outside the bedroom...or kitchen (wherever you guys have sex .) When you're out for dinner...or ice cream (whatever you guys do on date night), then ask her about it. Maybe?
Author Jeff1962 Posted January 19, 2010 Author Posted January 19, 2010 When did that change, and can she tell you what happened to cause the change? Nothing is to say that you two can't still continue to have open and respectful dialogue about it. I would back off trying to make it happen, physically. And maybe even start a convo about it way, far outside the bedroom...or kitchen (wherever you guys have sex .) When you're out for dinner...or ice cream (whatever you guys do on date night), then ask her about it. Maybe? Yeah, good luck with that one. Already tried.
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