sunrae Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 Hey Everyone... Well briefly in case you dont know my story.... Dated this guy for about 2 months, we really hit it off.. Meet the parents ect, Then he comes to my office one day and tells me he needs "time"and he doesnt want me to be the "rebound" girl. So, 2 months go by with a waive hello here and there and small talk.... So today he's doing a delivery in my office and I see him, we waive and he starts small talk.... I catch him before he leaves and ask him whats up? He asked for time, I have given him time and I would like to know what he's thinking or if he was just being nice and trying to let me down gentaly.... He said, he really does care for me but, he's just getting out of a long term relationship (4 years long) and only ended it 2 months before he asked me out... When he asked me out he was only looking for a "good time" and I caught him off gaurd... I'm the type of girl you end up marrying, and he's having a really hard time, because he doesnt want to loose me, doesnt want me to wait around because he doesnt know when he'll be ready to move on. Being the smart ass that I am, I told him to have fun, with the rebounders, but I'm not going to wait. He said he understood. I feel pretty good actually. At least now, I will close this chapter and keep on moving forward..
gaudi Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 The right thing was done here, by both of you. He has been honest, but then again it does sound like he's asked you to wait for him in a way. But you've done the right thing by asking, finding out, and then saying you're not one to wait around. Good for you.
Author sunrae Posted January 15, 2010 Author Posted January 15, 2010 Thanks Gaudi.... I kept getting mixed messages from him... And I'm not the one who likes to wonder, and I've been wondering for 2 months now, if or when he's going to come back around... I like to know whats going on, even if it hurts, so I can make my choices and move on and start the healing process.... I have also gotten some really good advice on here, which has made me stonger, Ive been working out and feel better about myself and I was like finally I want my answers, dang it! and I got them and feel pretty good about them... It was a really good conversation... I cant say that I wish maybe things would have gone a little bit different direction, but I asked, I got my answers, and time to move ahead...
HLP234 Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 That's good that you were able to get your answers. I would never get mine, some people just are not on that same level. They left, moved on, didn't even say one word..well then there is no point for answers. At least you guys were still somewhat communicating throughout which caused your result for answers. Sometimes you can get your own closure although it would feel great to tell them that you are done and have nothing to do with them anymore..sometimes things are better off unsaid. Just means that person is not mature enough to consider closing things off.
gaudi Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 Fingers crossed I'm going to be able to do the same soon enough. The pain is still deep with me. 2 months out of a 2 year relationship. Stories such as yours help me out though. One day at a time !!
Author sunrae Posted January 16, 2010 Author Posted January 16, 2010 I guess we were able to talk, because no one actually did anything to cause the other hurt. No hurtfull words or actions were said, so when he asked for time I never pushed, I just gave him his time. (and still will) Even though I dont understand some of the logic behind his thinking, I now understand more where he is at.. I guess if I was coming out of four year relationship, I wouldnt awant to get back into something right away. I dont understand his "rebound" logic... But I guess I never will. People heal and handle hurt differently... Yes, Gaudi.. One day at a time.... Thats all we can do...
Recommended Posts